Heavenly Grandfather - Fiona_of_Random_Fandoms - Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon) [Archive of Our Own] (2024)

Chapter 1: Episode 1: Holy Meeting

Chapter Text

It had been about a week since the sudden redemption and appearance of Heaven’s first ever rehabilitated Sinner: Sir Pentious.

And to say that the two Head Seraphims of Heaven were shocked would be the understatement of the century.

Emily was overjoyed, constantly showing Pentious around and quickly making friends with the serpent.

…as for Sera…

“SERA!” A familiar voice shrieked. “COME HERE!”

And who was that voice?

Michael Morningstar. The twin brother of Lucifer Morningstar himself. He had become the head of Heaven not long after his beloved brother's fall…and unfortunately, such responsibilities had taken a toll on the Angel of War as millennia passed.

Needless to say…Michael had a…temper. Even the Exorcists themselves knew better than to let him know about their own existence. Especially since he was the right hand to…well…the Father of Heaven, whom had been absent for some time.

Sera sighed as she teleported herself to Michael’s office. “Sir Michael. What is the problem- OH MY GOODNESS!!!” The Head Seraphim yelped.

And standing right beside Michael, looming over him to his towering height was a humanoid creature of some kind. He had no facial features other than a smile, with four eyes floating right beside him and complimenting a large tophat on his head. He was wearing a pristine and almostshiny suit, with had a long feathery cape with an entiregalaxy on the inside.

Finally, the figure was holding a large cup of wine and sipping on it.

This was none other than The Father of Creation. The Ruler of Heaven. Creator of the known universe.

God. And in one of his many forms no less.

“…hello, Sera.” The Father of Heaven said.

Sera was at a loss for words, stuttering and spouting gibberish.

Michael was steaming. He looked exactly like Lucifer, but he preferred not to wear a hat, and his usually kept blonde hair was a mess. His golden wings were ruffled, and his suit was wrinkled up. His blue eyes were glowing, and, being a Seraphim himself, eyes were constantly opening up on his body. He had an entire bottle of wine in his hand, along with several stress toys…which were almost destroyed.

“Sera… sit, younger sister.” Michael snarled, looking like he'd snap any second.

Sera immediately obeyed and sat down at the office.

God hummed and then snapped his fingers, suddenly summoning an entire meeting table, which he sat down at the edge at. He then snapped his fingers again and summoned three more.

The other Head Seraphim, Sir Pentious, and Lute, who looked like she had just gotten done scolding…somebody.

“Huh?! Wha-” Lute's voice promptly died in her throat when she noticed the head of the table.

“Lute.” Michael spat, taking a swig of the bottle. He then looked at Sir Pentious, who was sitting still out of fear. “Hm. Edward Bennett, correct?”

“Y-yesss, sirrrr, Ssssaaiint Michael.” Sir Pentious stuttered, nervous.

“My apologies if you are at unease. I am… very stressed at the moment.”

Emily, however, was only flabbergasted for a minute…before she squealed like a squeaky toy. “Saint Michael! Heavenly Father!!! It’s…it’s so nice to finally meet you!!!” She cried, flying up to the tall head of the table.

Sera’s eyes widened. “E-Emily-“

The Father of Creation was silent…before a large grin formed on his face. “Emily! Is that you? You were hardly an infant last I saw you!”

Emily gasped. “You remember me?”

“Of course I do, little one.” God chuckled. “Michael. Isn’t she adorable?”

A small smile grew on Michael's face as he looked at Emily fondly. “She is, Father. As precious as she was the day You brought her to us.”

Emily giggled. “I’m only 205!”

“And those two centuries ago is a fond memory.” God chuckled.

Emily then noticed Sera and Lute and her eyes widened. “Are…are my sister and Adam’s second in command in trouble?”

“Yes, my dear.” God said. “They are very much in trouble. You and Sir Pentious are not. I simply just wanted to properly meet him.”

He then turned his head towards Sir Pentious and smiled. “Hello, Edward! Tell me, have you found your…what were they called? Err, Egg Boiz! Is that correct?”

“Y-yessss, ssssir, my Lord.” Sir Pentious nodded. “They ended up in the Heavenly Pets district of Heaven due to being reborn as little chicks. They love the playgrounds!”

God laughed. “Oh, that is very sweet. I quite like Frank, I believe his name is. Anyway, I apologize if I get…cross. As you can see through my son, I am…not in the greatest of moods. For my vacation was interrupted by the one I entrusted to protect Heaven’s souls wasn’t doing her me-damn job.”

Sera gulped, looking more terrified than…well, ever.

Emily’s eyes softened. “Heavenly Father-“

“Emily. Please. You can call me Grandpa. Or Grandpa Morningstar.” He chuckled. “I quite like the sound of that!”

“Oh! Umm! Okay! Grandpa!” Emily smiled. “Can you please go easy on my sister? What she did was horrible, but…she’s still family. And she deserves a second chance at the very least.”

Grandpa Morningstar sighed. “I can’t promise that, my dear…but rest assured, no harm will come to her. You and Sir Pentious are excused.”

Sir Pentious gave Sera a sympathetic look, before he walked over and held out an arm for Emily. “Come, Missss Emily. We'll wait in the lobby.”

Emily hesitated, but she linked her arm with Sir Pentious’, and the two slowly left the room.

Lute swallowed, feeling sweat dotting her forehead as Michael gave her a scathing look.

“Michael.” Grandpa Morningstar said. “You may have your, err, turn when I am done. Could you hold it in for me?”

Michael sighed, but nodded, taking another swig as he grabbed one of his stress toys.

Grandpa Morningstar took a small sip of his wine before having it float beside him. He then stood from his chair and fastened his bow tie and adjusted his tophat…and then his eyes glowed gold.

“I GO ON A 500 YEAR VACATION TO TRY AND WATCH OVER EARTH AND ALL OF ITS INHABITANTS, AND I COME BACK TO SEE MY SON HAVING A MENTAL BREAKDOWN IN MY OFFICE AND THAT YOU TWO WERE COLLABORATING IN A ME-f*ckING GENOCIDE!!!” GM shouted, his voice bouncing off the walls and literally throwing Sera and Lute right out of their chairs. “WHAT WERE YOU ME-DAMN THINKING?!?!”

Sera slowly climbed back up. “H-Heavenly Father-“

“Sera!!! I chose you to protect Heaven’s souls because you were the wisest of all my Seraphims! The oldest! You have existed since the beginning!!!” GM cried. “I assumed you could handle such a task!”

“W-with all due respect, sir, please just…let me explain my side of the story.” Sera said.

GM’s eyes narrowed and he sat down. “I am all-hearing and all-seeing, Sera. Once I got back, I ‘caught myself up’. You thought that Adam’s idea of yearly genocide was a good idea to prevent an uprising from Hell, who by the way, wouldn’t even be able to get past Heaven’s gates?”

“My lord, Hell was suffering in overpopulation a-and I wasn’t even sure Sinners could be redeemed! It just…it just hasn’t happened until now!”

GM huffed. “I wanted that to happen from the start, Sera…but evidently! Creating, let alone trusting that fool of a First Man is one of my biggest mistakes…”

Sera blinked. “…what?”

“S-sir, we…we don't understand.” Lute finally uttered, looking confused.

Michael scoffed, suddenly. “Are you two stupid? And I thought Luci's head was in the clouds too often…at least he understands what mistakes are…”

“When I first exiled Lucifer and his wife to Hell, I had come up with a plan. I was well aware that not all Sinners were evil or had the capacity to change or even repent for their sins.” GM said. “So, I instructed Adam to give him my notes on how Lucifer could do that. I wanted the two to work things out…but I was too busy to think Adam still held a me-damn grudge against Lucifer for treating his wives like me-damn human beings and didn’t give him said notes.”

“…redemption…was…supposed to be happening…?” Sera squeaked.

GM nodded. “Yes.”

Sera was rendered utterly broken, unable to even think for a moment.

“But aside from that. Sera, did it ever occur to you that an uprising from Hell would be more likely if we kept attacking them? Eventually, they were going to fight back if you had kept it up…and look at that!” GM said with an angry smile as he pointed at Lute’s robotic arm. “They not only know how to kill you now, but them fighting back is exactly what f*cking happened!!!!”

“S-sir-” Lute gulped.

“Oh, shut up.” Michael groaned. “Adam was the father of mankind, Lute. Those Sinners you killed? Those were his descendants, sins be damned! He literally got you into killing his kids. Think about that, you friggin’ simp!”

Lute went dead silent, her eyes growing wide.

“Oh, by the way. Don't threaten my sister-in-law. She reported your ass to me. Moron.” Michael muttered, taking another swig.

GM then sighed. “So…it seems things have been made clear. Sera? You are no longer Head Seraphim. You will report to Emily now. Lute? You and your Exorcist army are disbanded…and me? Ohohoho, I’m never going on vacation ever again…”

Sera finally found her voice again. “O…of course…m…my lord…”

“Oh! And one more thing…I found out I have a granddaughter today.” GM said. “A pure-blooded granddaughter. And she, without reading my notes, put my system back on track…so, if you’ll excuse me! I am going to let my boy scream his heart out while I go visit my beloved grandchild!”

He then took his glass of wine and chugged it down before making it disappear as he began walking off. “Say hi to your wife for me, Michael!”

And then, in a flash of holy light, he was gone.

Michael grinned, almost maniacally, as he slammed his bottle onto the meeting table.

“Now…let's get talking, sisters… ESPECIALLY ABOUT THE WAY YOU TREATED MY NIECE, HER GIRLFRIEND, MY BROTHER AND MY f*ckING SISTER-IN-LAW.”

Chapter 2: Episode 2: Godly Grandparent

Chapter Text

Charlie smiled wide as she stepped down the stairs, still so utterly proud of the new Hazbin Hotel they had built. And she was even more happy that the Exterminations were effectively canceled thanks to their efforts.

They even killed Adam! And he was an asshole!

Her smile only faded when she saw the shrine they made for Pentious. She went over to it, and sighed. “Morning, Pen…”

Then, a familiar voice called out. “Charlie…?”

It was Vaggie. Her newly sprouted wings fluttered as she walked over, with KeeKee, their cat and the literal key to the hotel, scurrying over and rubbing herself on Charlie's leg.

Charlie giggled a bit and pet KeeKee on the head and then looked at Vaggie. “Morning, mi amor…gosh, those wings are so pretty…”

Vaggie's face flushed and she laughed. “Still getting used to them. Too bad eyeballs can't grow back.”

“Wouldn’t surprise me if they could.” Husk said as he walked out from his room, stretching a bit and already having a bottle in his hand.

Charlie smiled. “Morning, Husk!”

“Yup. Morning.” Husk nodded before sitting down at the bar.

There was a big yawn as Angel walked out, chuckling as his pet pig, Fat Nuggets, ran around playfully at his heels, apparently having the ‘zoomies.’ “Mornin’, guys.”

“Guess I better get started on breakfast!” Charlie laughed as she began walking to the kitchen…until suddenly, the doorbell rang.

The Princess of Hell turned. “Huh? That’s…odd. Who could- WAIT! THAT COULD BE SOMEONE WANTING TO STAY!!!”

Eager as ever, she rushed over to the door and opened it. “ Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel! My name is Charlie and- Oh! Oh, you’re tall!”

The voice at the door laughed. “I could be taller!”

Vaggie tilted her head curiously and approached…before she froze, her one remaining eye nearly bulging out of her skull as her jaw dropped.

“Wait…your glow looks familiar.” Charlie said before her eyes widened and she backed up. “Are you from Heaven?”

The figure held up his hands. “Wait, wait, wait! Before you become frightened, I’m not here to hurt anyone. But yes, I am from Heaven…actually, I rule Heaven, ha! I came here to meet you!!!”

Charlie smiled before she blinked. “Wait… rule Heaven? You’re…you’re the ruler of Heaven?”

“Correct! May I come in?”

Charlie hummed. “Well! Okay!” She said as she stepped to the side.

Then, in Grandpa Morningstar stepped, even having to duck his head through the door. “Ohhh! So this is what the Hazbin Hotel looks like! I love it! Red and gold compliment each other very nicely.”

Angel hummed, curious about the new stranger, but then noticed Vaggie frozen. “Vags?” He waved his hand in front of her face, confused. “Hell to vagin*! You in there, toots?”

No response.

“Char? I think your honey is broken.”

Charlie gasped and rushed over. “Vaggie? Vaggie, baby?!”

“Oh my.” GM said as he walked over. “I think I may have startled her.”

Husk chuckled. “And who are you supposed to be…and why the hell are you so bright?”

“Oh! I apologize, Henrik!” GM said as he toned down the brightness of his body.

Husk’s eyes bulged and he stood up. “How the f*ck do you know my name?”

Then, Alastor, Nifty, and Cherri walked out from their rooms as well, with Cherri giving The Radio Demon the stink eye before seeing their new guest.

“…stab!” Nifty said, remembering Charlie’s instructions about stabbing shiny people like the Exorcists.

Angel's eyes widened and he immediately took Nifty's knife. “No! No stabbing! Down, girl! Bad!”

Nifty pouted. “But he glows like the last one I stabbed! He glows so pretty!”

“Oh, you are referring to The Exorcists!” GM realized. “So, you’re the famous Nifty that killed my First Man?”

Alastor’s eyes widened before they narrowed, but he didn’t say anything.

“Answer my damn question!” Husk said. “Who the f*ck are you? How do you know my name? And what do you mean your First Man?”

GM then smiled. “Well, I suppose there’s no better time than now for introductions! I am the Father of Heaven and Creation itself. I don’t exactly have a name…but most mortals refer to me as God.”

Charlie whipped her head around to the tall and very well dressed man. “Huh!?”

Vaggie made a strangled noise, suddenly hiding behind Charlie.

Then…Angel burst into laughter.

“Oh, please. Charlie's grandfather? Then I'm Moses. Char, don't listen to this guy. He's probably a guy who keeps a list of souls and that's how he knows Husk's name. He's probably a con artist.”

Cherri nodded. “Yeah, listen to Angie! I mean, c’mon! This guy is God?”

Suddenly, GM then shapeshifted into a large bearded man wearing a white robe. “Were you expecting this? ”

Angel rolled his eyes. “Obviously someone's done their homework. Look, I don’t know whose rocks you're wanting to jack off, but trying to con the Princess of Hell? That's a dumbass move, even for an Angel. Get outta here, unless you want Nifty to steal your skin.”

GM sighed, but his smile was still evident as he turned back to the form he was originally in. “Well, I was afraid you would all say this. But very reasonable! You would not believe the cruel things humans do and say it’s what I wanted them to do. How can I prove it to you?”

Husk just growled a bit. “Flood something. Don’t you do that?”

“Ohhh, that was not my proudest moment.” GM grimaced before all four of his eyes lit up. “Actually! I may have just the thing to show you I am who I say I am!”

Charlie stepped closer. “And what’s that?”

GM then merely tapped his foot and the entire hotel transformed into a large stage, with all of them even wearing golden versions of their original outfits.

Charlie’s eyes widened and then she laughed as music began to fill the air.

GM then appeared beside his granddaughter, looking just as excited…and then? He began singing.

“~Well, let’s see, I can conjure up 40 thieves! All of them with blades galore!~” GM said as he snapped his fingers and sure enough, what he said appeared and pointed their blades at Charlie.

Charlie backed up before being held up in the air and hoisted onto GM’s shoulders.

“~But Charlie, you’re in luck! Cause in your blood, you have a grandad who rarely fails!~” GM said as he turned all of the thieves into stardust and then threw it across the room. “~You have God’s power in your corner now! Heaven’s ammunition in your camp!~”

He then tossed Charlie into the air, only for her to land in a bouncy castle, which GM was suddenly bouncing on with her. “~You got some punch! Pizazz! And so much more, and all I gotta do is show a samp, so I’ll say!~”

Then, a copy of him appeared in front of the others, but was giant. The guests at the hotel were as big as his foot.

“~Hello ma’am’s and sirs! What would your pleasure be?~” The copy asked before shrinking and suddenly looking like a waiter, with his tophat being gone as well. “~Just let me take a prayer, I’ll jot it down! You won’t ever have a friend like me!~”

The copy then disappeared and teleported them all onto a dinner table. “~Life is a restaurant and now I’m your maitre’d! Come on, just tell me whatever it is you want cause you’ll never have a friend like me!!!~”

That’s when GM snapped his fingers and one by one, gourmet meals that would take hours to make appeared on the table one by one, with Charlie eagerly grabbing one as it suddenly exploded into miniature fireworks.

“~I pride myself on service!~” GM grinned before waving his cape and they were all suddenly below Charlie, who was sitting on a throne made entirely of jade and gold. “~I’m the boss! The king! The shah! Say what you wish, and it’s yours, true dish! How about a little more baklava?~”

Then, Angel suddenly found himself sitting on a large pile of gold coins, with GM sitting beside him. “~Have some of column A!~”

Angel gawked at the coins, his eyes wide as he felt them, his mouth dropping as he realized that they were real. “Holy sh*t…”

Cherri was then on a pile of…bombs. She grinned wide before GM carried her off. “~Please don’t try column B!~”

Then, once again, GM appeared beside Charlie with a wide grin. “~I’m in the mood to help you, Char! You ain’t never had a friend like me!~”

GM then tipped his hat and a miniature version of him shot out of it, landing on the floor and doing a little dance routine with a cane and his feet tapping against the floor to add to the rhythm of the music. Then, the mini God tapped his foot a final time and lightning struck them all, but instead of killing them, it just teleported them to a large theater, with GM on stage.

“~Can your friends pull this!?~” GM said as he took off his own head, made duplicates of said head, and began juggling them.

Another GM appeared and started spinning lightning around like a lasso. “ ~Can any of you do that!? ~”

A final GM appeared in the middle of his duplicates and took off his hat…and took out a galaxy , holding it in the palm of his hand. “~Can your friends pull this out of their little hat? Oh, and can your friends go-“

Then, all three Gods exploded into fireworks, with another appearing behind the cast. “I’m over here!”

Charlie was smiling the biggest grin she could muster, looking like she was having the time of her life.

GM then took her hands and spun her around as the two danced to the music before the Father of Heaven spun around. “~Can your friends go ‘abracadabra’ and then ‘letter’ rip?~” He said as he summoned a giant version of the letter G in his hand, clearly making a Dad joke.

Charlie laughed before GM snapped his fingers over and over again as they all went back to the stage from the beginning one by one.

“~And then make us suckers disappear?! So, don’t sit there slack-jawed, buggy-eyed! I’m here to answer all your midnight prayers!~” GM said as he did a backflip and leapt into the ground as if it were a pool.

And to fit what he just did, they were all suddenly just relaxing at a pool, with the water being various colors such as gold, blue, and pink.

GM then floated by, holding up a contract that only had scribbles on it instead of actual words. “~You got me bona fide, certified! You have a God for your mortal affairs!~”

They were then in space , bouncing from planet to planet and shockingly being able to breathe in the void of the universe just fine. GM then leapt off a planet like a trampoline, dragging Charlie with him.

“~I have a powerful urge to help you out! So, what’s my task? I really gotta know!~” GM grinned. “~I can do a list that’s three miles long and all I gotta do is sing like sooo!~”

Finally, they were once again back on stage. GM spun around his cane. “~My dear granddaughter, yes, you have a dream! Or two! Or three! And I’m on the job because I’m God! So, I hope you’ll have a friend, hope you’ll have a friend! Hope you’ll have a friend, hope you’ll have a friend!~”

He then snapped his fingers again, summoning everything he had showed off earlier. “~Cause you’ll never have a friend like meeeee!!!~”

Charlie laughed and danced around, even taking GM’s cane and spinning it around.

“~The world can’t have a God like me!~” GM finished before they were all back in the hotel as if nothing happened.

Angel's eyes were wide as he struggled to process, then he slowly turned to Vaggie. “S-s-so…th-that's actually…?”

Vaggie nodded rapidly.

Angel stared…then he sat down, grabbed a whiskey bottle, then downed half of it in just a minute, his eyes still wide.

Husk, on the other hand, smashed his beer bottle in his hand. “What the f*ck was in that…?”

Alastor looked at himself before his eyes went static-y for just a moment. Only for a moment. He seemed to have already processed what had happened.

Nifty blinked. “Again! Again!”

“…HOW…WHAT…?” Cherri breathed.

Charlie then squealed. “GRANDPA!!!”

“CHARLIE!!!” GM smiled as he hugged his granddaughter, spinning her around. “Oh, it’s so good to finally meet you!!! I’ll give you 200 birthday gifts to make up for all the lost time!!!”

“Are you kidding?!” Charlie laughed. “I'm just glad to meet you!!! I heard so many stories!!!”

“And I’ve heard just as many stories!” GM grinned. “Like the fact that you did what no one could and rehabilitated a Sinner!!! Congratulations!!!”

Alastor snapped his head over. “…excuse me?”

Charlie was now finally like her friends, rendered absolutely flabbergasted.

“W-wait…what?” Vaggie whispered.

Angel's eyes widened and he dropped the whiskey bottle.

“W-wait…is…is it Pentious?” He asked quickly. “Sir Pentious is okay?!”

“Sir Pentious is doing fantastic actually!” GM chuckled. “He and his Egg Boizs are absolutely delightful. And I’ve only met them once.”

Cherri’s eye rolled to the back of her head and she actually fainted.

Husk rubbed his head. “…I NEED TO f*ckIN’ SIT DOWN.”

“The phony bad boy is alive?” Nifty asked.

GM laughed. “And in Heaven! According to Emily? He asks about you all everyday.”

Charlie…then began to cry.

GM’s eyes widened. “Oh, Charlie! No, no, please don’t cry! It’s okay! It’s okay!”

“Vaggggieeeee!” Charlie sniffled. “Weeee diiiid ittttt!!!”

Then, finally Lucifer walked down the stairs. “What in the unholy Hell is going on in-?”

GM gasped. “Oh! Lucifer! Hello!”

“…NOPE!” Lucifer said as he immediately headed back to his room.

Chapter 3: Episode 3: The Truth

Chapter Text

"…it seems my son still doesn’t want to talk to me.” GM said. “That…that is very fair.”

Charlie was still a sniffling mess at the realization that not only was her friend alive, but her hotel now had undeniable proof it worked. She even had a bit of snot dripping out of her nose.

GM’s four eyes softened and he summoned a box of tissues.

“T-t-thanks, Grandpa.” Charlie said as she grabbed one and blew her nose.

Vaggie's eye was shining with pride as she raced over, picking up Charlie and spinning her around. “I f*cking knew you could do it, princessa!!!”

“Vaggie, we d-did it!!!” Charlie cheered before blowing her nose again. “Pentious is aliiiive!!!”

Alastor looked down at the unconscious Cherri and lightly kicked her, only to see nothing happened. He then looked at GM, his eye slightly twitching, but his time to speak would come soon. So, he remained silent.

“…this…this is a lot to take in one f*ckin’ morning, man.” Husk said.

GM chuckled. “Please. Take your time. We literally have all of eternity.”

Angel stared off into space, processing. He, eventually, took a deep breath.

“S-so…we can…we can see our families again?” He eventually asked, his mind immediately going to his mother and sister. He was never close to his father for being different growing up…but maybe…maybe he could talk to his brother, at the very least.

He wasn’t sure about his father, but…but maybe his big brother had a chance too.

“Yes.” GM said. “However, you will all still have to do the work. I mean, I know I sang a song about how I can do anything for this hotel and for my darling grandchild, but redemption can’t be given. It has to be earned.”

He then summoned a whiteboard and a pointer, showing a rather expertly drawn version of Sir Pentious. “Take Sir Pentious for example. In his previous life, he was essentially the Victorian Era’s version of a terrorist. When he died, he continued that life…but after coming to this hotel? He learned there were things more important than power and found something worth fighting for. What truly redeemed his soul was when he selflessly sacrificed himself to stop Adam.”

Husk nodded. “…so…does Angel and anyone else gotta die to get to Heaven?”

“Oh, no, no.” GM reassured. “It’s likely Pentious would’ve just assumed his Heavenly form if his attempt had succeeded. Adam just so happened to blast him. So, none of you have to die to do this.”

“Well, that’s no fun!” Nifty pouted.

Angel gave her a concerned look. “...Nifty, we gotta talk about your definition of “fun” sometime…”

Nifty just gave Angel a creepy smile. “Okay!”

GM just sighed. “Speaking of little Nifty here, I may have to congratulate her. She was the one that killed Adam after all.”

“And you’re not mad that our little maid killed your First Man?” Alastor grinned.

GM’s eyes narrowed. “…Adam was a selfish, misogynistic, murderous, and infuriating piece of sh*t who was not only totally okay with murdering all of his descendants, but f*cking lying to me. I DO NOT MISS HIM, NOR WILL I MOURN HIM.”

Vaggie grinned. “f*ckING THANK YOU!”

“You’re welcome, Vaggie.” GM smiled. “But we shall have a small talk later if that is alright. I’m aware you’re one of his former Exorcists.”

Vaggie's eye widened, but she slowly nodded. “U-ummmm, s-sure, sir.”

Husk then blinked. “Wait…Adam lied to you? The f*ck is that supposed to mean?”

GM sighed. “Alright. So, you all know The Story of Hell? Lucifer gave Eve The Fruit of Knowledge, evil was introduced to the world, he and Lilith were banished for that crime, etcetera?”

Charlie wiped her eyes. “Ummm…yes?”

“Well! I realized that…my son actually had a point.” GM sighed. “Creating Eve to have no free will of her own was another mistake of mine. What’s the point in giving humans sentience if they couldn’t make their own choices? So, I came up with another plan. For all future humans, in this case Sinners, who would end up in Hell would also be given a choice. They could suffer eternal damnation…or better themselves. Once Hell started to suffer from overpopulation, I told Adam to give Lucifer the news about my idea. But, he evidently wasn’t happy with Lucifer and didn’t.”

Vaggie's eye bulged…and she clenched her fists. “...REDEMPTION WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HAPPENING THIS WHOLE f*ckING TIME?! CHARLIE WATCHED HER PEOPLE SUFFER FOR ABSOLUTELY f*ckING NOTHING…BECAUSE ADAM WAS UPSET THAT LILITH CHOSE LOVE?”

GM nodded. “Indeed…you can see why I was enraged. But! That’s why I became so eager to meet Charlie!!! She didn’t even read my notes and yet, here she is, already putting her idea into action!!!”

Charlie’s eyes were wide. “…this…was already supposed to be happening…and I’m the one who finally did it? ”

“Correct!” GM smiled. “Funny, is it not? But, with that…I have to sincerely apologize. Even if that was my plan from the beginning, I trusted that it was happening after I went on vacation. But, it wasn’t. The Exterminations were occurring and Sera approved because she feared something that couldn’t even happen. She has lost her position and my trust. The Exorcists are disbanded and Lute is going to have a much more severe punishment in Adam’s stead.”

Vaggie grinned. “HA! EAT IT, YOU EYEBALL STEALING c*nt!”

Charlie smiled and hugged her girlfriend. “Yay for payback!!!”

GM chuckled. “Indeed. And now? The Hazbin Hotel has Heaven’s full support. Any resources you need? They’ll be there. And my son supports you as well, so you have Hell’s support as well! This hotel is going to be a smashing success!”

“Just one problem.” Husk said. “Not a lot of Sinners are gonna believe us.”

GM just grinned. “I will handle that, my good man. And I hope you do not mind me staying here a little while! I’d like to spend some time with Charlie for the 200 years I missed. And maybe even get to know all of you!”

Alastor’s eyes glowed a bright red, but he didn’t do much else. It was pretty clear he was ticked however.

“We can’t really tell you what to do.” Husk shrugged.

Charlie then hugged her grandfather. “Yay!!!”

GM then hoisted Charlie onto his shoulders. “Yay indeed, my child!”

“Um…quick question.” Angel said, raising his hand. “...Charlie doesn't have a surprise grandma out there, does she? Like…the Big Bang and everything…?”

Charlie immediately looked mortified. “ANGEL!!!”

“Char, I just learned that God is actually real. My mind can't handle anymore shock!”

GM just chuckled. “It’s alright, Charlie. He was just asking. Keep in mind I’m responsible for sexual activities even existing…even though I did not expect it to go this far…anyway, no. I created my children with my will alone. If I were to have a significant other, I physically couldn’t get intimate with them.”

Nifty giggled. “Cause you’re all about virtue and stuff?”

“No, because I don’t have a butt or genitals. And if I did have those things, the activity would literally destroy my partner…and possibly create irreversible damage to the universe.” GM blinked.

“Ahhh. Gotcha.” Angel nodded, satisfied with the answer.

“I did not need to know that.” Charlie said, slowly shaking her head.

Husk then grinned, deciding to join in on Angel’s fun. “So, why call it The Big Bang?”

“Because the word ‘bang’ originally meant explosion.” GM said. “Not…you know.”

Angel giggled, amused by Husk's antics. “It’s still funny.”

“I suppose it is amusing.” GM said before he turned around suddenly.

And then, there Lucifer was…trying to sneak out the door with a bunch of suitcases.

Charlie’s eyes narrowed. “Dad. Where are you going?”

“…uhh…king stuff. ” Lucifer said.

GM sighed. “Samael-“

“It’s LUCIFER, Dad!!!” Lucifer cried. “I had my name changed over a million years ago!!! C’mon!!! See, this is why I’m leaving!!! Wayyy too awkward!”

“Son, it’s not like I’m moving in-“

“You’re moving in!? OH HELL NO!!!” Lucifer cried as he ran out the door.

Charlie hopped off her grandfather’s shoulders and chased her father down. “DAD, GET BACK HERE!!! DAAAAAAD!!!!”

Vaggie sighed. “...Nifty? Sic him.”

Nifty cackled like a madwoman and ran after the two.

“I'll get the blessed rope.” Angel sighed, walking off.

Alastor just grinned wide and then began walking off. ‘Well…this should be interesting…’

Chapter 4: Episode 4: Vaggie

Chapter Text

"Well then. That could’ve gone worse.” GM said before turning to Vaggie. “Is it alright if we have that talk, Vaggie? Since my granddaughter and my son are…uhh, occupied.”

Vaggie swallowed, feeling nervous. “Um…sure.”

GM smiled kindly before the two walked off, simply just going to the hallway. He then summoned two chairs, with him taking a seat. “So, how have things been for you? While Hell isn’t the eternal pit of damnation it used to be, it’s not exactly a cakewalk either.”

Vaggie hummed, slowly sitting down. “I mean…things aren't so bad. We finally have proof, Pentious is alive, and Lute and Sera are getting justice.”

“Well, that is delightful to hear.” GM smiled. “But, as for what I wanted to talk to you about…”

Vaggie swallowed. “Look. I intend to cherish and protect Charlie with everything I have-”

“I want to apologize for what Lute did to you.” GM said suddenly. “Frankly, I…I just want to apologize for everything that Adam and Sera had you do. You were a soldier. You were just following orders…and you were punished for it. Lucifer, at the very least, deserved a punishment. You? You spared a scared little boy. So I’m sorry.”

Vaggie's eye widened. “Huh?”

GM then looked up and chuckled. “Did you expect me to be angry?”

“I-I mean…I wasn't expecting that.” Vaggie admitted, feeling a little anxious. “It wasn't your fault.”

“And while you did swing the blade, it wasn’t completely yours either.” GM said. “But, while half of it is…that’s why you’re here. For redemption. And in my eyes, you have redeemed yourself. You defend the Sinners of this hotel, you’ve made Charlie so happy and you admit that what you did was wrong…if you wish, it is possible for you to one day return to Heaven. And I don’t mean for a simple visit.”

Vaggie's eye widened. She…she could go back?

She was shocked…but then she shook her head.

“I expected that.” GM smiled. “But know the gates of Heaven are always open for you, however.”

Vaggie smiled at that. “Thank you, sir.”

“So, what do you like to do for fun around Hell?” GM asked, now just wanting to start conversation…since he had the feeling Lucifer hadn’t been caught yet.

Vaggie hummed. “I mean, I have to help Nifty clean the hotel since it's so much bigger now, and I have to do grocery shopping a lot-”

“No, no. I mean, for fun!” GM smiled. “Things you actively enjoy!”

Vaggie hummed, tilting her head. “I mean…I like helping Charlie.”

GM’s smile then faded. “Okay…perhaps I should rephrase. What do you like to do for fun that isn’t a chore or related to Charlie?”

Vaggie opened her mouth to answer…and then closed it. Her cheeks turned red.

“I was afraid of that.” GM sighed. “Vaggie, while it is a good thing to help out your friends and loved ones, it is just as important to help yourself out. If you are entirely dependent on Charlie, then…I don’t see a very good future no matter how much you love each other. You may need to find something that you enjoy doing.”

And before Vaggie could say something else, the Father of Heaven held up a hand. “Without Charlie or helping the hotel. Everyone needs a hobby after all.”

“I mean…I don't know what I'd like.” Vaggie admitted.

GM hummed as he began thinking, even standing. “Well…you are rather agile. My foresight allowed me to see that after you lost your wings, you were still able to move around rather quickly.”

Then, his four eyes lit up. “I may have an idea on how you could start looking around.”

Vaggie tilted her head curiously. “What is it, sir?”

“As the kids would say!” GM said as he suddenly summoned a ball into his hands and then threw it at her. “‘Think fast!’”

Almost instantly, Vaggie's hand shot up and grabbed the ball, her eye wide in surprise. “Um…sir, I don’t-”

“Good catch.” GM chuckled. “If the baseball didn’t make it obvious enough, I personally would suggest a sport as a hobby! You yourself are a soldier and while it isn’t always the greatest idea to constantly be in battle, it is good to remain healthy both physically and mentally! And sports are a good way of exercising your body and who doesn’t a love little friendly competition? It certainly helps you focus more if I say so myself!”

Vaggie hummed, looking at the baseball curiously…then smiled. “I'll…think about it.”

“That’s all I ask.” GM smiled before hearing the door open, so he teleported them both back.

And sure enough, Charlie had trapped her father…in a dog kennel. She then looked at him. “Dad. What do we say to Grandpa?”

Lucifer groaned like a kid being forced to go to school. “…welcome to Hell, Dad… ”

“Pleased to be here!” GM smiled.

Angel peeked out, and blinked. “How hard was it to get him in there?”

“Pretty easy! We used a rubber duck as bait!” Charlie smiled.

Chapter 5: Episode 5: Husk

Chapter Text

Grandpa Morningstar decided to wake up the next morning a little early, not that he exactly needed sleep due to him being the creator of the known universe. He just thought it was a nice way to relax and recharge.

But much to his surprise, a familiar face was already at the bar.

“Oh! Henrik!” GM smiled. “Good morning, my friend!”

The avian cat grunted, taking out bottles of alcohol for the day. “Er…mornin’, Lord.”

“You can just call me God…or Grandpa Morningstar…actually! ‘Boss’ has a nice ring to it!” GM smiled.

Husk shrugged, wiping down glasses that needed cleaning. “Okay, Boss.”

GM then walked over. “So, what are you doing up so early? I can’t imagine 6 AM is the proper time for a drink.”

Husk sighed, looking at the glass.

“I…couldn't sleep.”

GM’s four eyes softened and he suddenly stepped inside of the bar, now the one sitting behind the table instead of the other way around. “Am I allowed to ask why?”

Husk hesitated. “Er…don't you know everything? Mama used to say you do.”

GM chuckled. “See…that’s the tricky part. So, I am capable of seeing everything and hearing everything. Understand?”

Husk nodded. “I…think so.”

“That means I literally see and hear everything…all at once.” GM sighed. “And unfortunately the lifeforms of Earth, Heaven, Hell, and even the souls of Purgatory don’t often wait for me to process all the information. Even a being such as myself has trouble making it all out. So, I tend to ‘shut off’ my omniscience. It makes it much easier to do anything without something that is more painful than a bad hangover.”

Husk winced. “That sounds like overstimulation on steroids, damn.”

GM chuckled. “I suppose that is an accurate description. And that is not the only thing I limit on myself. For example, I may like to use my powers to ‘show off’ so to speak, but…there really is so much meddling I can do.”

His face then lost its smile. “Many humans often pray for people or pray for a better life. I hear all of it and I always have to convince myself not to intervene in such a big way…because if I do? I’d be doing what I did with Adam, Lilith, and Eve, essentially controlling every aspect of their life. And if I used my control over reality to grant every single wish or solve every single problem…they wouldn’t learn not to do it again.”

Husk chuckled, but it was a weak sound. “Some never learn. Not until it's way too late.”

“Precisely.” GM said before his eyes softened even more when he heard the weakness in his voice. “…is there something you wish to talk about? I understand bartenders are often the ones with wisdom…but…”

His fancy tuxedo and cape then transformed into that of a simple button up shirt and golden suspenders. He now looked like a bartender himself. “That doesn’t mean they don’t have their own problems that need a listening ear.”

Husk sighed, gnawing on his bottom lip. He wasn’t sure if he should say, but…

The others were asleep.

f*ck it.

“I, uh…always knew I was different from my family.” He admitted. “Especially when I was a dumbass teenager, I knew it. I…always kinda knew that I was…y'know…”

GM tilted his head. “Preferred a bit of both?”

“Yeah. Or anyone of gender, I guess. I'm thinking that I'm, uh, pansexual. Um…my father…he wasn't very proud of me. But, I wanted to prove him wrong, so, when I was in my thirties, I got myself drafted.”

GM’s eyes widened a bit. “You’re a soldier? While I knew your name and tidbits of your history, I didn’t know you had fought in a war.”

Husk sighed. “World War II…it was Hell on Earth. I…I-I made friends, and I thought I was doing the right thing…but…”

GM just nodded, trying to show he was listening.

“Then…sh*t started getting bad. My friends were dying, other people were dying…not just soldiers. Citizens. Women, children…I just couldn't understand why people hated others for being different.”

The Father of Heaven sighed. “I can’t understand either. Some say it's fear of what they don’t fully know and others say it’s just how some are. I don’t really know myself because everyone has a different answer to the question…so, what happened after the war ended?”

Husk sighed. “I was on the verge of becoming homeless. ‘Honor to those who sacrificed’ my ass. So, I had an idea. I always wanted to be a magician when I was a kid, and I was good at it, too. So, I kinda became a street performer.”

“And I take it this helped your eventual casino career?” GM hummed, summoning a small stack of playing cards and sliding them over to Husk, almost as if he wanted to see some of the tricks he could do.

Husk nodded, taking the cards, putting them into two rows. And then, he slowly turned them over.

Amazingly, he managed to somehow separate the red and black cards, despite each of them being in a random row.

GM, despite being able to do all kinds of actual magic tricks, looked rather impressed. “And if I recall correctly, you became quite the skilled gambler…is there anything or any one else I’m missing before…well. You began your new career down here?”

Husk took a deep breath. His breath was a little shaky.

“...I had a daughter.”

GM’s eyes widened and he used a tiny bit of his all-seeingness to get a visual on what his daughter looked like. “…what was her name?”

“Minnie. I always called her ‘mouse.’ She hated it.” Husk chuckled softly. His eyes were filled with fondness. “She was just a baby I found on my doorstep, something like out of a damn movie. I didn't have the heart to just put her in an orphanage. I…I felt lonely. I was selfish. Still kinda am.”

GM hummed. “You know, when someone often blames themselves for being a ‘selfish person’, it implies that selfish in itself is a bad word. A bad idea. It’s not really. Self-care and mental health are quite important, especially in this modern day. But much like the Seven Deadly Sins, the problem is when you do too much of it. When you’re too selfish, too greedy, too lustful, too wrathful, too lazy, too jealous. The list goes on…so I don’t think you’re selfish. At least, not in the way that makes it bad.”

“Maybe not back then, but…when Minnie got older, I started gambling more. Started drinking more. I really thought I could stop, but…I didn't. My mind and body wouldn't let me. Withdrawal isn't just mental. It's physical, too. I felt like I needed it. So, I kept doing it. And, eventually, I began cheating so I could just bring food to the table for my baby.”

GM’s eyes softened. “And then…you died because someone found out you cheated and wasn’t very happy…I would ask how old your daughter was, but…it doesn’t matter. It’s always too young.”

Husk sighed shakily, running his hand over his face. “I never forgave myself. I let her down. She needed me, and instead she became an orphan all over again. I wouldn’t blame her if she cremated my body and threw my ashes into a lake somewhere.”

GM then gently slid Husk a glass of water and gently took one of the cards. “I know better than anyone what that feels like…I have 9 children. One of them hates me and one of them was crucified…but in a way, I still feel like I let all of them down…and even if I had the power to turn back time itself, there isn’t any changing the past.”

He then turned the king on the playing card to that of Lucifer. He then did the same with all the other cards, each of them showing his sons and daughters. “But…if there’s anything I’ve learned? It’s that you can change the future. And while you may not be here for redemption…”

One of the cards then changed to Angel Dust. “You’ve already helped someone reach that path. Someone who hated himself and his life so much…you made him feel seen. You made him feel wanted…and if it brings you any comfort at all?”

He then changed the card to that of Minnie, showing both what she looked like as a human…and what she was in Heaven. A wolf of some kind. “She never forgot you…nor does she resent you. No matter how much you think she should.”

Husk's eyes widened and he stared at Minnie's card in awe. He covered his mouth, taking in her pink hair and her punk rock outfit. Tears beaded in his eyes, and he struggled not to break down then and there, sobbing quietly into his hand.

“It’s alright, my friend. Just let it out.” GM said. “There’s no one up but you and me.”

Husk sobbed. He had to sit down, weeping into his hand. And GM could sense it.

Relief. So much relief and regret and sadness. He was relieved that Minnie made it to Heaven, but saddened that he couldn’t just hold her in his arms.

And one more thing that Husk had regretted, one that he had not said because it was a well known fact…

GM could see a bright green chain around Husk’s neck, leading all the way to Alastor’s room. He reached over gently, actually loosening the chain just a little to give him more comfort.

“It’s not too late for you, Henrik Skylar.” GM whispered. “And if there is any reason to keep trying…it’s those you care for.”

Husk's eyes watered, but he slowly nodded. He hesitantly reached for Minnie's card. “Can…can I…?”

“Go right ahead. I have an infinite supply.” GM said with a nod.

Husk smiled and took Minnie's card, gently holding it as if it were valuable, or even fragile. This was the gentlest he'd been yet.

His eyes landed on Angel’s card, and his face flushed pink.

Chapter 6: Episode 6: Angel Dust (Part One)

Chapter Text

GM and Charlie walked through a portal, with the two having just spent the day together.

“Vaggie, Vaggie, Vaggie, Vaggie!!!” Charlie squealed. “Grandpa took me to Earth!!!!”

Vaggie grinned, standing up. “Really? How was it?”

Angel overheard, and he looked up, eyes wide. “Wow…how much did Earth change?”

“It’s actually a lot like here!!!” Charlie cried. “With tons of technology and people, and all kinds of monuments!!! Ohhh, and the animals were so cute!!! Thank you, Grandpa!!!”

GM chuckled, patting Charlie’s head. “I hope you enjoyed the song that came with it.”

“I didn’t just like it, I loved it!” Charlie squealed. “Guess I know where I got my love of singing from! Both Dad and you!”

“I did invent the concept.” GM chuckled.

“That’s amazing, sweetie!” Vaggie cheered, hugging her girlfriend. “I'm so glad you liked it!”

Angel smiled…but it faded as memories suddenly flooded his mind.

Memories he wished that he could forget.

And it seemed GM could sense it and his eyes softened before he looked at Charlie. “How about you tell Vaggie all about Earth? Especially since she’s only ever been allowed to view it from Heaven.”

“Oooh, good idea!” Charlie cried before holding Vaggie’s hands. “Okay, so we started in-“

Their voices faded as they walked away and GM turned towards Angel. “Is everything alright, Angel?”

Angel's eyes widened. “O-oh. Yeah, everything's okay, Big G. Just…just thinking, that's all.”

“Am I allowed to ask what about or is it ‘none of my beeswax’ as you kids say?”

Angel snorted. “People don't really say that anymore, you know.”

“They don't?” GM blinked. “Hmm. Forgive me, I’m literally older than the universe itself. I still don’t exactly know how to work one of those fancy computer things.”

Angel laughed at that. “Man, you have a lot to catch up on, don't ya?”

“Yes, yes I do.” GM chuckled. “But still. If you need someone to listen to whatever’s on your mind, I’m your God. You’re one of my granddaughter’s closest friends and you’ve made many efforts to redeem yourself. If you ask me? You’ll be in Heaven in a few months if you keep this up.”

Angel hesitated. “...I don’t think I deserve it.”

GM walked over. “And why is that?”

“...You really don't know, huh?”

“I know a lot of things about you, Anthony. But I also know there are things that others may not want me to know.” GM said. “If I truly wanted to, I could view your entire life up to this point and know more about you than anyone other than yourself. But I don’t want to invade your privacy…so if there is anything you’re comfortable with telling me, I’m all ears…figuratively. This body does not have any visible ears.”

Angel laughed at that. Then, he took a deep breath.

“...I'm the son of a mafia boss. I killed people for him. Whether or not they were innocent don’t matter. I killed them, and I liked it. I liked the power it gave me. Serial killer sh*t, I know.”

GM hummed. “Your father was a cruel man who was well aware he would be arriving here. Even your brother said he wanted to come to Hell to see if it was real…and from what I’ve seen, they are still doing what they did in their former life. So, tell me…what are you doing now?”

Angel thought about it. “...Trying to help Charlie achieve her dreams?”

“That’s certainly one of the things you’re doing.” GM said. “But it’s not the main reason you are where you are now. So, tell me that reason. And ‘because it gives me a free room’ is a lie. Believe me, I can tell.”

Angel hesitated. He gnawed on his lip, finicking with his hair. Then, he took a deep breath.

“...I wanna get better.”

GM smiled. “There it is. You see, most serial killers or mob bosses or various criminals down here who truly don’t deserve redemption or a second chance…are the kind that continue to do what they are doing despite the consequences. And while yes, you have admitted you once held a sense of power over those you killed…that has changed. The only people you’ve killed in an entire six months are greedy Loan Sharks or Exorcists. And you didn’t exactly do it because you got a sick pleasure out of bloodshed. You did it out of self-defense. Tell me, do you still find pleasure in senseless murder and violence of innocent or guilty?”

Angel slowly shook his head. “No. I…I hate it, honestly. I only got bloodthirsty if the others were in danger of getting hurt or worse…like this one guy who tried to hurt Husk when he saved me from a spiked drink. I didn't feel relief until I knew he wasn't seriously hurt.”

“Exactly. And ruthless killers who don’t deserve a second chance would not feel any empathy for their victims.” GM said before sitting down. “You’ve made mistakes, Anthony. But so has everyone. What matters is that you’re trying to be better and succeeding. And if you still don’t believe that you deserve it…take your mother and sister for example. They did the exact same things you did, yet the only difference is that they changed before their time was up on Earth. You changed a little later than that, but does that really matter?”

Angel sighed, shaking his head. “I…I guess not, but…the forties were a bitch. Dressing up wasn't allowed. Liking dolls when you’re a boy wasn't allowed…collecting jewelry and wearing girly clothes wasn’t allowed…I felt ashamed of who I am. I wanted to fit in with my dad and big brother. I wanted to prove them wrong. I wanted to show them that I'm a man.”

GM smiled. “You already have, Anthony. While you are correct, back then, liking other men or wearing dresses when you yourself are not a woman was looked down upon…times have changed to the point where there is an entire month dedicated to showing who you truly are inside. You are a man and you like other men. You are a man and you like to wear feminine clothing, play with dolls, collect jewelry. The only thing that your dad and brother were wrong about was that a man can’t like those things.”

He then chuckled. “And while annoyingly so, there are still people like that to this very day…it is okay to be who you are. And you are a good person who has made mistakes, but are learning from them. You have people who understand exactly what you were going through, possibly during a time where instead of being looked down upon, it would equal in death if a man loved another man…heck! One of my sons up in Heaven likes other men and no one judges him for it. Some may be confused or even a little upset, but it’s his life. Much like this one is yours.”

Angel stared at his lap, slowly taking in GM's words. He sniffled, wiping at his eyes. “Th-thanks, Big G…u-um, how are they? Ma and- and Molly? I…I feel bad for pretty much leeching off of them for drug money before I…y-y'know.”

“I do. Molly and your mother are doing terrific…but they miss you. Molly talks about you a lot and your mother has pictures of you and your siblings still.” GM smiled. “I’ve actually spoken to your mother before, did I ever tell you that?”

Angel's eyes widened and he looked at him. “Wh…what did she say…?”

“Well, she urged me to try and eat something due to how skinny this form is.” GM chuckled. “But, she also thanked me for allowing her and her daughter to come to Heaven…and even asked if you were coming. I hope I can report back to her that you are when I go back to Heaven.”

Angel's eyes watered, and he took a deep breath. “...Tell her that I'm trying as hard as I can. I'm trying to wean myself off of the drugs and alcohol. I'm trying to control myself when it comes to, err…lovemaking. I…I'm trying, and while I don't think I'm in a place where I can say for sure, I'm at least better than I was the last time they saw me, and…and I’m sorry for lettin’ them both down.”

“I will relay the message.” GM said as he handed Angel a box of tissues. “Now, if you’ll excuse me my boy, there is someone else I wish to speak to here. Will you be okay?”

“I…I think I'll have to steal KeeKee and Fat Nuggets for cuddles, but…y-yeah. I'll be okay, I think.”

GM smiled and then teleported both KeeKee and Fat Nuggets onto his lap for him as he walked off.

But, he then summoned a cup of Heavenly wine and sipped onto it as he walked. “…it is going to be awkward when he finds out his mother has been my daughter-in-law for three years…”

Chapter 7: Episode 7: Charlie

Chapter Text

After a rather sentimental talk with Husk, GM had been planning a special day for him and his granddaughter ever since…well. Yesterday.

When he met her.

It had only just recently occurred to him how fast time had flown by already.

GM then smiled wide when he saw his granddaughter walk out. “Good morning, Charlie! How did you sleep?”

Charlie giggled, her eyes sparkling. “I'm great! I'm just really excited to spend time with you. I always wanted to meet you, but…you know…Dad…”

GM’s smile faded slightly. “Yes, uhh…that’s another road that we’ll go down another day. But today’s road! I have something fun planned! I did come down to spend time with you after all!”

Charlie grinned. “Yeah? What is it?”

GM walked over. “A quick little trip! Just you and your grandpa! But where to is a surprise!” He said as he booped her nose.

Charlie snorted. “Alright. Dad knows I'm with you, so I hope he won't worry too much…”

“We’ll be back before he even knows we’re gone.” GM said as he snapped his fingers and summoned a portal. “I’d leave a note for Vaggie and the others though! Since you are their friend and the owner of this hotel.”

Charlie smiled and nodded, grabbing a piece of paper and a pen. “Good idea!”

GM patiently waited, even imagining a little tune in his head and lightly bopping his head before Charlie walked back over. “Alrighty then! Let’s go!”

The two then walked through the portal and it closed behind them and after a brief flash of light…Charlie found herself in a bright green forest right beside her grandfather.

Charlie’s eyes widened and she looked around in shock. She had never seen a place so… green, before.

“Grandpa? What is this place?”

GM smiled wide and then spread his arms wide, presenting the massive forest. “Charlie Morningstar...welcome to Earth!”

Charlie's eyes bulged. “E-Earth?! Where…where my friends come from?”

“Where all humans come from.” GM smiled. “And the very planet I focus the most on.”

Charlie looked around, her eyes wide as she took in the most beautiful place she had ever seen.

Green, luscious grass…trees with brown bark, a river nearby, birds singing and chirping their song, bramble bushes…

It was breathtaking.

Not even Heaven could compare!

“W-w-wow…”

GM smiled before he noticed something nearby. His grin only grew and he gently held Charlie’s shoulder…and he began to sing in a soft voice. “~Come with me…and you’ll be…in a world of pure imagination~”

He then gently turned Charlie around to show them a little fox was looking up at them, clearly confused as to what they were. The fox looked young, likely not an adult fox. Its black eyes had this shine to it and its fur was as fluffy as a cloud.

“~Reach out, touch…what was once…just in your imagination~” GM smiled before he knelt down, gesturing for the fox to come closer. “~Don’t be shy. It’s alright…if you feel…a little trepidation~”

The fox then slowly crawled closer, looking up at Charlie specifically.

Charlie slowly knelt down, hesitantly reaching her hand out for the little fox to sniff. She…she had never touched earthly animals before. What if she hurt it?

But then, the fox gently nuzzled her hand, making an adorable little purring sound.

“~Sometimes these things don’t need explanation~” GM smiled as a bird landed on his shoulder and he petted its little head with his finger before watching it fly off. “~If you want to view paradise…simply look at them and view it~”

The fox then gently crawled into Charlie’s lap, still nuzzling her hand.

Charlie giggled, gently petting the little creature, and then she looked up upon hearing what seemed to be a calling sound.

Another fox stood, looking older than the little one. It's the mother, Charlie realized, and she smiled softly. She gently set the little fox down, watching it scamper back over to its mother.

It…reminded her of her and her own mother. Charlie knew that her mother had struggled with fertility due to a curse after the Fall, but somehow, she had come to be.

And she and Lilith had been close ever since.

Then, she noticed her grandfather looking at the river close by, where a family of ducks were swimming across. There was the parent, and 9 little ducklings following.

“~Somebody to hold onto, it’s…all we really need~” GM sang softly, his voice even cracking a little like he was crying for a moment. But then, his smile grew as he looked at Charlie. “~Nothing else to it~”

The wind then blew, causing Grandpa Morningstar’s cape to blow and Charlie’s hair as well…and the wind almost sounded like music.

GM’s smile then grew almost goofy as he held out his hand to his granddaughter, looking excited.

Charlie raised a brow, but she smiled and held out her hand, reaching for her grandfather's.

And when she took it, GM then began to spin them around the forest. “~Come with me and you’ll be in a world of pure imagination!!!~”

They then went through another portal and arrived in a small neighborhood, but it seemed that none of the humans there could see them or the portal.

And in nearly every yard were families. Some were talking, some were playing in the pool, and in almost every one were children. Laughing, smiling, running around, doing whatever they wanted without a care in the world.

GM then summoned a golden cane as he pointed to several of the scenarios. “~Take a look! And you’ll see into your imagination!~”

He then began spinning around as they suddenly appeared in the city, which unlike Hell and even Heaven, was covered in a bright blue sky with all sorts of colors instead of just red and gold. And instead of demons or angels walking around, it was humans.

“~We’ll begin with a spin traveling in the world of my creation!~” GM sang as he took his granddaughter’s hand and they began walking down the sidewalk, admiring all the sights and sounds. “~What we’ll see will defy explanation!!!~”

They then suddenly leapt onto the top of a moving car, with GM holding onto his tophat so it wouldn’t fall off. “~If you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it! Anything you want to, do it!~”

The two then leapt onto another one, and then another one before the cars all stopped as a group walked across the crosswalk.

GM then leapt onto the crosswalk, even doing a little quick tap dance routine. “~Want to change the world? There’s nothing to it!~”

Then, GM held his granddaughter’s hand again and they went through another portal as they went into an entirely different continent, on top of the Great Pyramid of Giza, being able to see a small city across from it.

“~There is no life I know to compare with pure imagination!!!~” GM sang as they began traveling the entire planet through his portals, seeing all the sights and places and people it had to offer.

Cultures, monuments, technology, families, it was all so much to take in. And so many moments of…well. Humanity.

Friendships being made, adventures being had in the sky or on the ground, romance of all kinds, inventions that Charlie once thought were exclusive to Hell alone, and even families being made through the little infants being held by their parents in various hospitals after hours of struggling.

It all felt even bigger than Heaven. Grander almost.

But then, they suddenly landed at a lake, but Charlie was on the docks while GM had landed on the water, but he was staying afloat with a large grin.

“~Living there, you’ll be free…if you truly wish to beeeee!!!!~” GM cried as he shot fireworks into the sky, all of them in various and bright colors.

Charlie laughed, clapping her hands. “Oh, Grandpa!!! This place is wonderful!”

GM smiled as he walked on the water back to her before hopping onto the dock and then taking a seat. “It really is, isn’t it? Oh! And we’re just in time for the sunset. Pop a squat, Charlie! It’s beautiful.”

Charlie giggled and sat down. Her eyes widened and she gasped softly. “Wow…”

And the sunset in itself was almost…indescribable. It lit up its half of the sky in a beautiful golden-orange that was mesmerizing to look at. And as the minutes passed, it went down more and more.

GM sighed softly, even closing his eyes as he took in the sounds of the lake’s water washing onto the shore. And when they opened, he looked at Charlie. “So. What do you think of Earth?”

Charlie beamed, admiring one of the most awe-inspiring beauties she'd ever seen. “...It's imperfect…but that's what makes it so beautiful.”

GM laughed. “Couldn’t have said it better myself…I may have shown you everything great about this planet and its people, but you have seen firsthand the bad that can come from it in Hell…but in all honesty? That just means you should appreciate the good things that are there and strive to make more of it. Earth won’t ever be perfect, especially if not even Heaven can be, but I don’t think I want it to be. Not anymore.”

He then held up his hand, manipulating the water into the shape of the Earth. “Many humans and even some people in Heaven are disappointed with how Earth turned out. And I can’t deny the wars and terrible tragedies that happen everyday…but…I think some of it is exaggerated. People call me an optimist, but I like to see myself as a realist…and that reality is just not so bad.”

Charlie giggled, smiling wide. “It’s really not. Sometimes people forget that, but…that’s okay.”

GM turned to his granddaughter and ruffled her hair. “You’re most certainly my granddaughter, Charlie. And the best one I could ask for!”

Charlie beamed. “Really? I'm surprised my aunts and uncles didn't have children of their own.”

GM hummed before he beamed. “Well, I technically do have one other grandchild in Heaven, but by adoption. You would love her. She reminds me a lot of you, actually! But, a lot more of…err…Angel’s kind of jokes.”

Charlie giggled. “He'd probably get along with her then. Angel's very sweet…just in a tough situation.”

“I’ll have to get to know him more then. Perhaps I can help.” GM smiled before he sat back. “For now though, let’s just enjoy the moment.”

He then summoned a small handful of stones and set it in between them. He then grabbed one of them and skipped it across the lake.

Charlie smiled and picked up one, skipping it across the lake herself. Then, her face fell.

“...Grandpa?”

“Hmmm?” GM asked as he skipped another stone. “What is it, Charlie?”

Charlie skipped another one. “...Do you know where Mom is?”

GM’s four eyes widened and he turned. “…she…hasn’t been with you?”

Charlie shook her head, sniffling. “...She disappeared 7 years ago…Dad told me they had an argument and…and she didn't come home.”

GM’s heart clenched because he knew where Lilith was. But if she had gone to Heaven of all places, then that meant she didn’t want to be found.

And while he badly wanted to tell Charlie…it wasn’t his place. Not yet anyway.

He then reached over and wiped away his granddaughter’s tears. “Wherever she is, I’m sure she’s so proud of you for what you have accomplished. I don’t know where she is or why she left, but…I will find her.”

It hurt him to lie to his beloved grandchild, but…truth be told, he didn’t know why Lilith had left. He didn’t know what had changed between her and Lucifer. But, now he had a reason to discover that.

“So, chin up.” GM smiled. “I haven’t known you for very long, but I already hate seeing you cry.”

Charlie sniffled, and smiled weakly, wiping at her eyes. “Sorry…I just want to know if she's okay. If she's safe. I…I figured she may have been struggling. After all, she was busy a lot when I was a kid.”

GM’s eyes softened. “…I…think I know why. She must have been ruling over Hell alone since…your father…”

He then took a deep breath. “Your father didn’t want Hell. He didn’t want to be a king, truth be told…your mother on the other hand? It seemed she had embraced her new role, but we both know leadership can change anyone’s point of view. However, I know your mother. She’s strong and absolutely fearless. She’s not going to let anyone, not even Heaven and Hell’s armies combined, harm her. She’s alright out there…”

Charlie smiled, feeling a little better as she looked at the sunset. “I hope so. I really hope so.”

GM then stood. “Speaking of Hell, how about we get back there? It’s starting to get late and a growing girl like you needs your sleep.”

Charlie laughed. “Grandpa, I'm 200. I'm not little.”

GM grinned cheekily. “200? You’re right! To me, that’s barely an infant! Perhaps I should’ve brought a stroller.”

“Grannnndppaaa!”

“I’m kidding, my child.” GM laughed as he snapped his fingers, with the two walking back through.

Chapter 8: Episode 8: Alastor

Chapter Text

The Father of Heaven caught notice of his son and grinned, realizing he was just in time. “Lucifer!”

Lucifer yelped and turned. “OH, sh*t! DAD!”

GM walked over to him. “How was your day, kiddo?”

Lucifer blinked before looking from side to side. “…uhhh. Good! ”

And that’s when he teleported right into his room, giving GM the signal that he definitely wasn’t ready to talk.

“…well, I’m hopelessly crushed.” GM said, breathing out fake laughter before he began walking away…until he suddenly stopped.

A familiar radio host then began to speak. “I must say! There is nothing more entertaining to watch than family drama!”

GM turned, his smile having disappeared. “Alastor.”

Alastor grinned his signature grin and walked over. “The Big Cheese of Heaven himself knows my name! I must say, I’m honored! Quite honored!”

GM hummed. “Well, you have quite the record of Sins and you were a well known serial killer, Alastor. And I keep track of people like that.”

Alastor chuckled. “Come then! Let’s talk, shall we? After all, it seems to be what you’re good at!”

GM then gave a little smirk and began walking with Alastor into the lobby. “You aren’t phased by who you are talking to. Even Husk and Angel were clearly nervous…you even processed I was who I said I was when we first met rather quickly.”

Alastor laughed. “I must say, I had my doubts! But your magic was quite impressive!”

“And far surpassing yours.” GM said as he took a seat.

Alastor’s eye twitched a little at that, but his smile remained as he took a seat across from him. “Well, things like that haven’t stopped me from harassing your boy!”

“Oh. I’m well aware.” GM said. “He could tear you apart, yet you talk to him as if you’re his equal in power. I must say, your lack of fear is admirable.”

Alastor chuckled. “Coming from the creator of the known universe? That is quite the compliment!”

GM then snapped his fingers and suddenly, a tray of jambalaya appeared in front of them, with steaming radiating from it. “How about a snack?”

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say it was poisoned!” Alastor laughed. “You do have a history of causing floods and plagues!”

GM hummed as he took a bite of the jambalaya, having summoned silverware and plates. “I was a different God back then…much like how you were a different man so long ago.”

Alastor took his own plate and a bite. “Hmmm! This actually brings me back! I must say, you must’ve ripped out this recipe straight from my mother!”

“I did.” GM said.

Alastor was silent for a moment, but his large grin remained. “She never hands that over to just anyone, you know.”

“I’m aware.” GM said. “But I’m not just anyone…unlike you…”

Alastor grinned. “Seems you don’t know me as well as you think you do, Jehovah…”

GM seemed a bit surprise at the use of one of his names, but he just grinned as he took a bite of the jambalaya again. “Oh, I think I do…I know you sold your me-damn soul for all that power you have.”

Alastor froze and dropped his fork and he looked at GM, his eyes temporarily turning black.

“What’s wrong?” GM asked. “You look like you want to strangle me…”

“i Do…” Alastor hissed.

“But you know you can’t.” GM said. “Please, Alastor, you’re smart enough to realize I would’ve known about your…situation. I even know who you sold your soul to. I have to say, it was clever of her to disguise herself as a deity from the Voodoo Religion to trick you…tell me. Do you know what she really is?”

Alastor’s eyes were completely black with red radio-dial pupils and his antlers had grown large and razor sharp. “I do…she told me.”

“She does like to brag.” GM said, not even intimidated by pieces of Alastor’s true demonic form coming out as he kept eating. “Am I getting under your skin, Alastor?”

“Ohoho, very much so…that is not something many walk away from…”

GM chuckled. “You were given this power to become the strongest Overlord in all of Hell, and you let it get to your head. So, you can’t stand it when someone is more powerful than you and you look for any way to stand above them. Such as my son, using his relationship with Charlie against him…I bet you had the poor girl convinced you genuinely saw her as a daughter.”

Alastor’s antlers finally shrunk down. “I suppose that is a possibility…”

GM then finished his plate and set the silverware down. “So, let’s make things clear, Alastor…we are not friends. You have no intention of staying here to change yourself and you take entertainment in the suffering of others.”

“Ohoho, the lack of friendship is very mutual. I can assure you.” Alastor smirked.

“But…you are incapable of doing any real harm to anyone in this hotel as of now. And you have defended it, even if it was for your ego and out of the small hope that you’ll be able to escape your owner’s clutches.” GM said. “So…I’d like to make a request.”

Alastor chuckled. “And what makes you think I’d accept said request after what you just said to me? I may not be able to harm you, but I doubt dear Charlie would like it if you obliterated me…and your status does not matter to me.”

“Oh, I’m aware.” GM chuckled. “But hear me out…you’re a deal-maker, aren’t you?”

Alastor grinned wide. “I doubt you’d be stupid enough to offer your soul to me just for a favor…”

“Oh, please.” GM laughed. “Even if my soul could be sold, you wouldn’t be able to handle it…no. This is a simple deal. A favor for a favor.”

Alastor hummed. “Very well…”

“Advertise the hotel that redemption works through your radio broadcasts.” GM advised. “You’ve made it clear that radio is not dead and that Hell very much knows and fears you…so, you have influence. And we both know that you aren’t exactly great with television.”

“Worthless piece of junk…” Alastor chuckled.

GM hummed. “I never cared much for it myself either. Never understood it. Besides, Earth is like my own ‘TV show’.”

“So, what’s in it for me?” Alastor asked.

GM’s eyes softened. “…you may send a message to your mother through me and I will make sure she gets it.”

Alastor’s eyes widened and his smile, for just a moment, flickered.

“I know there is some good in you, Alastor.” GM said. “Whether you want to admit it or not, you are growing fond of Charlie and want to protect her. You get along well with Zestial and Rosie…and the love you have for your mother has not faded.”

“…how is she?”

GM sighed. “Well…fine for the most part. She wasn’t particularly happy to find out you were a serial killer, even if your victims were usually other killers and crooks.”

“…as I expected. ” Alastor said. “…very well then. It’s a deal.”

GM nodded. “What is the message you want to send to her?”

“…tell her that I am sorry.” Alastor said, not elaborating any further.

The Father of Heaven tipped his hat. “A pleasure speaking with you, Radio Demon.”

Alastor’s composure returned as he stood. “The pleasure is all yours…Heavenly Father.”

Chapter 9: Episode 9: Cherri Bomb

Chapter Text

The next day, GM was once up early and just walking around the hotel. But, he was now just viewing a large family portrait in the lobby.

It was of Lucifer, Charlie…and Lilith.

‘Why did you leave?’ The Father of Creation wondered.

“Oi! Big G!!!” A voice with a familiar Aussie accent suddenly cried.

Thankful it wasn’t the Sin of Greed, GM turned around and saw the one-eyed (sort of) resident of the Hazbin Hotel. He smiled kindly. “Ah, good morning, Casey!”

Cherri blinked. “…how the f*ck do you know my name?”

GM’s smile softened and he gave her a ‘Really?’ gesture, looking very amused.

“…right. God.” Cherri nodded. “Yeah. Anyway, I’ve been looking for ya ever since you told us my boyfriend was alive! You never stay in one damn place!”

GM hummed. “Oh. I’m sorry. I was just excited about getting to spend time with Charlie and then I had to talk to Henrik, then Anthony, and then I tried to talk to my son, and then Alastor came in.”

“Creepy Bambi-ripoff…” Cherri mumbled. “Alright then! My turn to chit-chat with the Sky-Daddy of Heaven!”

GM’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t ever call me that. Please.”

“Yeah, it was wrong as soon as I said it.” Cherri said before she went over, having to look up at the Ruler of Heaven since he was so tall. “So, how is my man?”

GM hummed. “I wasn’t aware you two were dating.”

“Well…we aren’t.” Cherri said. “He…kinda had a thing for me and I was too f*ckin’ blind to see it. Then, he gave me a really nice kiss before he…well…”

“I’m aware of that part.” GM said. “But to answer your question, Pentious is doing fine. The first thing he asked when he went to Heaven is if you were all okay.”

Cherri’s cheeks reddened and she grinned. “…man, he’s a sentimental snake. So, can I see him? Like, can’t you use your all-seeing-whatever to bring him down here?”

GM hummed. “I suppose I could-“

“Great! Please do!” Cherri cried.

GM then held up a hand. “I will, I will. But, since we are talking, I’d like to ask you something in return.”

“Alright. Shoot.” Cherri said as she sat down.

GM took a seat across from her. “From what I have seen in your life, you have quite the…explosive personality.”

Cherri snorted. “That’s a you-damn understatement.”

“When you were alive, you were a wildcard. You were so hyperactive and always wanting to live life to the fullest…and then, you found out what a bomb was.” GM said. “It was fireworks first, then firecrackers, and then dynamite, and then…well, let’s just say you were quite the dangerous pyrotechnic.”

Cherri laughed. “Yyyup. Make ‘em myself.”

“But then, your hunt for the thrill got innocent lives killed.” GM said.

Cherri’s eye widened and she sat up. “…well, sh*t. Way to remind me…”

“It’s what got you sent to Hell, Casey. Your blatant disregard for others’ lives and safety, even your own.” GM said. “And it seemed the song from 1976 really stuck with you. Considering you literally named yourself after it.”

“Man, am I that obvious?” Cherri asked. “But you’re just kinda tellin’ me my own life. What’s the actual question?”

“I’m getting to it.”

“And for the record? I don’t not care about others.” Cherri said. “Angie’s my best bud! We drink, we get high, we fight together! Hell, we even landed a few guys together one time. Oh, that was a night!”

GM hummed. “And you were always there for him whenever his life started to get to him.”

Cherri’s eye softened. “…I mean…what was I supposed to do? Tell him to suck it up? No way.”

“And now comes my question: why are you here?” GM asked. “To my knowledge, you were completely content with your life down here. It has all the thrills you could ever wish to chase.”

Cherri blinked and she was left silent, thinking for a moment. “…I mean…Angie’s here and I miss him. The others are decent people. Husk’s a good guy to drink with, Nifty’s a creepy bugger, Vaggie’s one mean mama, and Charlie’s happiness is you-damn contagious…Alastor’s just f*ckin’ creepy.”

GM shrugged. “His boss is much worse.”

“Ignorin’ that, I…don’t really know why I’m staying.” Cherri said. “I mean, the more I think about it, I…guess I’ve kinda reached a peak.”

GM hummed. “A peak?”

“I’ve done every f*ckin’ thrill that Hell has to offer! Hell!” Cherri said. “I’ve fought wars all by myself, I’ve done every stunt, I’ve even blew myself up! Regeneration is painful by the way.”

“It’s meant to be.” GM said with a nod.

Cherri then sighed. “I’ve gotten to levels of high that I don’t even remember…the fun’s kinda starting to lessen now. I fought against Angels and didn’t die. Like, what else can you do to really top that?”

“So, you’re staying here because you no longer find the thrills fulfilling?”

“I mean…I guess that’s part of it.” Cherri said. “And hey, you just said the whole Redemption sh*t works.”

“But before The Exorcists attacked the hotel, you didn’t even want to really change yourself.” GM said. “So, I ask again: why are you staying here? What is now making you feel so fulfilled?”

Cherri took a deep breath. “Okay…gettin’ serious here…so…sh*t, how long has it been since I’ve talked about this?”

“If you don’t want to talk about it-“

“No, no, no. I’m over it.” Cherri said. “Okay, so…I did have someone before Pen. Don’t really wanna say his name, it ain’t worth it. Bottom line, he used the fact that I loved him as a way to get what he wanted. Was a piece of sh*t.”

GM’s eyes softened. “I see. I’m very sorry.”

“Thanks. But it happened years ago.” Cherri said. “He liked to have me for a quick f*ck, blow sh*t up together, and had his ways of getting me to forget talking about how screwed up we were. Eventually, he ran out of ways and I dumped his ass...into a flaming pit, but still. We were through and…man, that was probably the first time I was vulnerable, y’know?”

GM nodded. “Even someone with all the power in the universe can know what it feels like to be vulnerable.”

“Yeah…it…really f*ckin’ hurt. Thought he cared about me as much as I did him.” Cherri said. “I got over it with some help from Angie…and Pen was still any rival at the time. And after that kiss, man, I feel so stupid…he was giving so many f*ckin’ hints…complimenting me, treating me like an equal, being all cute and gentlemen-y, and just…well. Not treating me like something, but someone. You get it?”

“I do.” GM said.

Cherri then sighed. “So…when he died, I…I was kinda confused. I blew him up more than once, but he straight up died for us. For me. He wasn’t gonna regenerate, so…one day, that settled in once I started staying here. And then I just…cried. Came right out of nowhere. Couldn’t stop for a while. I…I miss him. I wanna actually get to know him on a personal level.”

GM’s eyes softened.

“…plus, Angel told me he’s got two dicks, so-“

GM held up a hand. “Casey. The question.”

“Right, right, right…so…I guess I’m staying here 'cause I wanna see him again. I wanna…find something worth living for again. All the death and carnage actually got old. Chaos started to becoming boring and…unsatisfin’.” Cherri said. “And especially with your comment about what got me sent here, it’s…it’s really starting to get to me…I kinda forgot about it cause no one really dies here unless it’s holy stuff…”

GM then walked over. “So, you want to change for the better?”

Cherri looked down and then back at him, nodding.

“Then, much like Angel, put in the work.” GM said. “I will allow you to see Pentious as much as I can…but have him and the thought of a much more fulfilling existence be your new thrill. Your driving force. Heaven may not be nearly as a explosive, but…it’s still a fun place. It’s not all relaxation.”

Cherri sighed in relief. “Good. Cause, I may find a lot of it boring now, but I still like that stuff! Y’know?”

GM nodded. “I do.”

“…y’know, you’re a real nice guy to talk to.” Cherri said. “Always thought you’d be more of a…”

“Douche, as you kids put it?”

“Yeah, that!” Cherri said. “But, you ain’t even that scary. sh*t, you don’t even act like you’re God half the time.”

GM chuckled. “I had more than enough time to do that a millennia ago. And much like your hunt for the thrill: It got old.”

Chapter 10: Episode 10: The Seven Deadly Sins

Chapter Text

"…so! Where are we going?” GM asked as he and his son walked down the street. He looked particularly excited.

Lucifer didn’t speak, he just had a pouty face on.

Charlie had insisted that her father take him for his meeting. And while he wanted to refuse, his daughter had the dreaded ‘puppy dog eyes’ technique. He got that from him.

“Son?” GM asked. “Lucifer?”

Lucifer groaned. “Okay, fine, you’re impossible to ignore! I have an annual meeting with The Sins that I’ve been blowing off for seven years, along with the rest of my king duties. And as a Deadly Sin myself-“

“Rather prideful of you to say!” GM quipped.

Lucifer, a fan of dad jokes, tried to keep in a chuckle. “As a Deadly Sin myself, it’s about time I show up. Besides, I haven’t spoken with the others in a while and it’ll be nice to catch up…hopefully they’re not too pissed that I brought you with.”

“Oh, don’t worry!” GM said. “You won’t even know I’m there!”

“Dad, you’re taller than Lily, it’s gonna be impossible not to notice you…then again, Ozzie’s usually pretty tall.” Lucifer hummed.

GM smiled wide. “Exactly! So, just pretend I don’t exist and I won’t mess with your playdate.”

“I’ve been trying to pretend you don’t exist for- Wait, playdate?” Lucifer asked. “Dad, I’m as old as the Earth itself! This is a meeting!”

“Right, right, right!” GM said. “I just remember when you would come in on my meetings and call it a play date when you were younger! Wanted to make it an ‘inside joke’ as you kids call it!”

Lucifer facepalmed. “…Dad, you cannot be that old. ”

“…you’re right, I just like saying that.” GM chuckled. “Still don’t understand those fancy mini-computers.”

“…you mean a cellphone?” Lucifer asked. “C’mon! Even I have one of those!”

“Lucifer, those things are used for so many things other than calling. It cannot be considered a phone anymore.” GM said. “By the way, why is everyone staring at us? Including traffic?”

Lucifer blinked. “…yeah, I guess I haven’t been out in a while.”

They eventually arrived in the poorly named ‘Meeting Palace’ in the middle of Pentagram City. And much to their surprise, they were the first ones there.

Lucifer took a seat at the end of the table. “Okay, haven’t had to act professional in a few hundred years…”

“Son, you’re the King of Hell.” GM said. “Even I have to act professional sometimes!”

Lucifer sighed. “It’s hard to act professional when other Royals are whiny little babies who only care about land or money or politics and your subjects just wanna cause as much destruction as they can, Dad!”

“Not all Sinners are heartless. Charlie taught us that.” GM said.

“Oh, I’m not just talking about them. The Hellborn aren’t any better.” Lucifer said. “And you and everyone else gave me this sh*thole to rule over! Thanks a lot for that, Dad.”

GM’s eyes softened. “Son-“

Then, suddenly, in a small blast of blue flames, The Sin of Lust appeared in the room. Asmodeus.

Lucifer grinned. “Heyyy, Ozzie! Long no time no see!”

Ozzie’s eyes widened and he turned towards Lucifer. He even rubbed his eyes. “…Luci?”

“How long’s it been?” Lucifer asked.

Ozzie was about to answer before his eyes widened even further at who was right beside his old friend. “…Lucifer. Why the f*ck is your dad here?”

GM waved. “Hello, Asmodeus! I’m ‘digging’ the new look!”

Lucifer sighed. “Long story. But he isn’t here to start Armageddon or something. He’s just here as a visitor.”

Ozzie then sat down. “I…see. That aside, what the hell are you finally doing here? You haven’t been to one of these things in forever!”

“I was… very busy.” Lucifer said.

Ozzie’s eye raised. “Making rubber ducks?”

Lucifer blinked before he reached into his pocket and slid one that looked exactly like Asmodeus over. “Does this make up for it?”

“…you’re forgiven.” Ozzie said as he held the rubber duck replica, admiring the attention to detail. “Oh, it even has a little mane!”

Lucifer nodded. “Took forever to make that! Ya like it?”

“Like it? I love it! Ohhh, Froggie’s gonna squeal…and in the cute way, not the ‘f*ck me’ way.” Ozzie chuckled.

GM grimaced a bit. “Right. Lust equals sex.”

Ozzie grinned. “Oh, don’t tell me. You and your heavenly folk get all ‘OH DEAR’ at the mere mention of sex. Didn’t you create it?”

“I’m fine with the mention of it. It’s just…evolved in a way I did not intend.” GM said.

Ozzie just chuckled. “Shouldn’t have made it feel so good then.”

“That aside.” Lucifer said. “When are the others gonna get here?”

“If they do. You aren’t the only one who’s been blowing these off.” Ozzie said. “But there’s a lot you’ve missed, Luci.”

Lucifer sighed. “Yup. I know.”

And then, one by one, the other Deadly Sins arrived in their own dramatic entrances.

First was Beelzebub, Sin of Gluttony. She arrived in a small swirl of honey and…whatever’s in lava lamps that isn’t actual lava.

Next was Leviathan, Sin of Envy, who appeared through a small tidal wave of pitch black water.

Then there was Mammon, Sin of Greed, who arrived in a puff of green smoke, electricity, and a cha-ching sound.

Then, there was Belphegor, Sin of Sloth, who appeared and…almost immediately passed out on the table. Her entrance was not that dramatic.

Finally, there was the Sin of Wrath, Satan. Often confused with Lucifer, Satan was what everyone thought ‘The Devil’ was. Bulky, red, dragon-like, a voice that commanded respect, and easily the most edgy of the group due to his entrance being surrounded in flames that burnt the room.

“…dammit, Satan!” Lucifer said. “You do know mostly everything here is highly flammable, right?”

Satan’s eyes narrowed before he noticed GM. “...Heavenly Father… ”

“Oh, sh*t.” Leviathan said as he suddenly hid under the table.

Bee gasped. “Luci!!! Hi!!!! It’s been forever!!!!”

Belphegor just snored before Satan smashed the table, causing her to sit up. “sh*t- I’M UP!”

Mammon blinked before leaning over to Ozzie. “Yo, Oz! Is that-“

“Don’t even come within an inch of me, Mam.” Ozzie snarled, blue flames starting to surround his mane.

GM then cleared his throat. “How about I get some snacks for all of you while you do your meeting? How does that sound?”

“…that, uhh…sounds fine, Dad.” Lucifer said.

Bee gasped. “God giving us snacks? Man, the world must be coming to an end!”

“Beelzebub? When did you become a Hellhound, dear?” GM asked, smiling.

Bee giggled. “Oh, they’re just my peeps! So, I wanna look like one! We can all shapeshift after all!”

“That you can. Anyways! Just pretend I’m not here!” GM said as he left the room to go fetch and or make them some snacks.

Leviathan slowly peeked out. “…is he gone?”

Ozzie sighed. “Yeah, Levi. He’s gone.”

“Good. I hate meeting new people.” Leviathan said, still looking rather anxious to even be there.

“Explain.” Satan boomed, staring directly at Lucifer. “You have abandoned your duties for far too long, ‘your highness’.”

Lucifer sighed. “Good to see you too, Satan…so, yes! My father has come for a visit! He was recently made aware of Charlie’s existence…and Heaven screwing up again!”

“Oh, Charlie!!! Man, I miss her! How’s my favorite niece?” Bee smiled. “Is she still sweeter than literal candy?”

“Yeah, my little girl is still a bundle of joy.” Lucifer laughed. “And her hotel is working and has my full support. Dad’s too, but who cares about that?”

Belle blinked, rubbing her eyes. “Wait…am I still high or did you just say redemption works?”

“Yes, Belle. I did.” Lucifer said.

“You’re probably still high though.” Ozzie said. “Seriously, woman, when are you not tired or high?”

Belle pointed at him. “Hey, I…I…f*ck, I’m too lazy to come up with an insult.”

Mammon laughed. “So, how’s our niece doing? Like, if this hotel f*ckin’ works, then she’s bound to be making a profit, eh?”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed. “She’s already rich, Mammon. Why would she need any more money?”

No one really liked Mammon.

“There’s always the ability to make more money!” Mammon cried. “Hell, I’ve been making a f*ckin’ profit off of the Fizzies Sale…considering that little sh*t quit-“

“Do not call him that.” Ozzie snarled.

Mammon turned, snarling back at him. “Oh, you wanna go, mate?! I’m still f*ckin’ pissed at you!!!”

“Oh, pipe down, you Australian Christmas tree!!!” Ozzie boomed. “You’ve got two newbies who wanna be exploited!”

“For your f*ckin’ information, they’re making bank!!!”

“Then why are you still so mad about losing Fizz 'cause of your sh*tty attitude!?!?”

“'Cause I don’t like being humiliated, ya piece of garbage!!!” Mammon cried.

Satan then slammed his fist on the table, cracking it. “ENOUGH!!! SIT DOWN. BOTH OF YOU!!! I TIRE OF YOUR CONSTANT BICKERING!!!”

Leviathan slowly slid under the table again, clearly a bit intimidated and even more socially anxious thanks to Satan’s yelling.

Bee noticed and then went under as well, mostly to try and bring him back out.

Lucifer blinked. “…okay! Clearly, I missed a lot! So…please catch me up. That’s what these meetings are for anyway. Ozzie, you first. How’s Lust and you been?”

Ozzie sat up straight. “It’s been going well. For one, I’m in a happy relationship now with the most handsome Imp around. His name is Fizzaroli.”

Belle blinked. “You’re dating somebody…? I thought you…uhhh…what’s the word…only did sex stuff?”

“Belle, just because I’m Lust doesn’t mean I can’t fall in love.” Ozzie said. “And I did! Don’t care who knows it 'cause, frankly, who’s gonna do anything about it?”

All of them, even Mammon, nodded and murmured in agreement.

“You were really bad at hiding it anyway.” Leviathan said, slowly coming back out thanks to Bee’s encouragement.

Ozzie sighed. “Yup, I know…as for my ring? Pretty good. My club’s doing well, designing some new toys to really get people off, annnd…having to rebuild a hotel due to a recent turf war or something. Between two Imps, a Hellhound, and some Power Rangers-Iron Man cosplayers.”

“Turf war?” Lucifer asked. “You have those too over there?”

Ozzie shrugged. “Not really, but uhh, it’s Hell. What do you expect? Oh, and I gave Prince Stolas one of my crystals so his sort-of boyfriend can travel to the living world legally.”

Satan raised an eye. “You gave permission for a demon that isn’t a Succubi or Incubi to travel to the living world? For what purpose?”

“I don’t know. Still looking into it.” Ozzie said.

Satan stood up. “Asmodeus, it is your sworn duty-“

“HA! Duty.” Mammon grinned.

Satan slowly turned his head towards Mammon. “...I’m going to rip your spleen out from your bloated body if you keep that up… ”

“Okay! Moving on!” Lucifer said. “Congrats on the relationship, Ozzie.”

“Aw, thanks.” Ozzie smiled.

“Satan! Since you spoke up, how’s Wrath?”

Satan sat back down, his eyes narrowing. “Wrath is going smoothly. Fights of all kinds happen, but my Imps all respect me and my power. And I trust that your little mystic field will keep Sinners out?”

“Yes, I can assure you, not even the strongest Overlord can break through that thing. We don’t want them hurting the Hellborn.” Lucifer said.

Satan huffed. “Yet, you still have them run around your ring like it’s a jungle…when you should be controlling the Sinners and their outbursts. You do nothing to command respect of them.”

“I don’t want the respect of people like them, Satan. We’ve been over this!” Lucifer groaned.

“You are King! You should act like it!” Satan boomed. “Lilith was a far better ruler than you could ever hope to be.”

Lucifer’s heart clenched at the mention of his wife and he sighed. “Yes…yes, I know…”

Bee looked at her fellow Sin. “Satan, cool it. Please?”

Satan huffed and sat back down. “…apologies.”

“…still haven’t found her?” Ozzie asked.

Lucifer shook his head slowly. “…but that’s not what this is about. Bee? How’s Gluttony?”

“Oh! Going fantastic!” Bee smiled. “Honestly, I’m surprised no one goes there more often. It’s just one big f*ckin’ party and there’s no violence! Just good vibes all around!”

“Your music is too loud…and you keep trying to steal my medication.” Belle said, her eyes narrowed.

Bee laughed. “C’mon, Belle! Just call them what they are: Party Drugs.”

“They’re prescription pills.” Belle said. “And you keep trying to steal them, you jackass…”

“Okay, Belle! How’s Sloth?” Lucifer grinned.

Belle blinked. “…fine, I guess.”

Lucifer tilted his head. “…is…is that all?”

“Yeah.” Belle said. “I don’t really check…hey, does anyone got a pillow I could lay my head on?”

Lucifer then sighed. “Not sure what I expected…Leviathan! How’s Envy?”

Leviathan looked around, feeling a massive spotlight on him. “…it’s good.”

“Can you go into detail?” Lucifer asked. “No one’s gonna judge you.”

“We’re your friends, bud.” Bee smiled, trying to encourage the Sin of Envy.

Leviathan then took a deep breath and sat up. “…the beaches are nice and…and EnVee’s doing pretty well…could be better, but…I-I dunno, I still think it’s a cool app…”

“It’s an amazing app.” Ozzie smiled. “And hey! How’s that musical of yours going?”

“…I threw it away, wasn’t worth it…”

“Ah, c’mon! Don’t say that!” Lucifer said. “You know Hell loves songs!”

Then, the Father of Heaven poked his head into the room. “Did someone say songs?!”

Leviathan quickly hid under the table again.

“Oh! Sorry!” GM chuckled as he brought in a tray of snacks. “Hope I’m not interrupting you all! Not ‘cramping your style’!”

Lucifer slammed his head on the table. “I almost forgot you were here…”

Mammon gasped and quickly stole the tray, pouring it down his mouth with all the snacks and various foods falling onto the floor as well. And in mere moments, the tray was bare. “Thanks, Big G!”

GM blinked. “…you…could have shared, Mammon.”

“Nah, they didn’t need ‘em!” Mammon grinned.

Ozzie sighed. “Can I please strangle him?”

“Mammon…how’s Greed?” Lucifer asked, knowing he’d regret it.

Mammon shrugged. “I dunno!”

“You don’t know?” Satan asked. “You’re its ruler! How do you not know?”

Belle summoned a pillow, but Bee took it away. She then faced Mammon. “Yeah, even I kinda know…”

“Look, I don’t really care about what my Ring does! I just want the money it gives me, and boy! Do I get some money!” Mammon laughed. “Oh, and some Mafia f*ckers try to overthrow me. It’s goddamn hilarious- Hey! GODdamn! Ya get it?! 'Cause-“

“I make that joke too.” GM said before leaning over to Lucifer and whispering. “I am so sorry you have to put up with him…”

“You and me both.” Lucifer whispered back before clearing his throat. “Okay, I think that’s all! Pride’s as sh*tty as it’ll ever be, so no need to report there!”

GM turned. “I wouldn’t say that. Did you tell them about Charlie’s hotel and how she and her friends personally ended the Exterminations?”

“Yes, Dad.” Lucifer sighed.

“Oh! Okay, good!” GM smiled.

Satan stood. “You have to start managing your Ring, Lucifer. One of these days, it will go beyond your control and you can’t just hope someone else will deal with it.”

Lucifer sighed. “I know, I know. I’m gonna start trying to be a better king…'cause…'cause Lily’s been gone for seven years and I’ve been ignoring my role and my daughter for too long…”

GM’s eyes softened.

“So, I’m gonna start making some changes…and as an apology for not contacting you all in some time…I made you all these.” Lucifer said as he snapped his fingers.

And then, much like Ozzie’s, rubber duck replicas of each of The Sins appeared in their hands.

Satan just stared at it, his expression emotionless. “...how…thoughtful. ”

“OMG, IT’S SOOO CUUUUTE!!!” Bee squealed.

Belle smiled. “Hey, it is pretty cute…it’s got my candle and everything…”

Leviathan just stared at his duck, hiding a smile.

Mammon tapped the duck. “Aw, shucks, Luci! I knew you liked me!!! This is why we’re best friends!!!”

“You just said we’re best friends so I can’t sue you for ripping off my theme park.”

“Yup! Best friends!”

Chapter 11: Episode 11: Anthony (Part Two)

Chapter Text

It had been about a week since the Father of Heaven stayed in the Hazbin Hotel, and while he used his omnipresence to be in two places at once (one in Heaven and the other in Hell), he decided that he would eventually have to make his leave soon. He just had a few more things left to do.

He badly wanted to talk with his son, but it seemed that no matter what, even after the meeting with The Sins, Lucifer would avoid him every chance he got.

…not that he could blame him…after what happened all those years ago…

But, he had also been getting to know everyone at the hotel quite well. So much so that he would call them friends…except Alastor.

“And that’s my story!” Nifty grinned.

GM blinked. “…I have heard and seen some very disturbing things in my time…and that was definitely up there, my little friend.”

“Hehehe, am I scary to you?”

“I said it was up there. Top 10.” GM said. “And not even 1 on that list really frightens me. You’ll have to try harder…that being said, I’d like to see you twice a week from now on.”

“Okay!” Nifty said as she hopped off his shoulder and went back to cleaning.

GM then went over to the bar. “Husk, my friend! How are things?”

“Smoothly, boss. Same as usual?” Husk grinned.

GM chuckled as Husk handed him some wine. “Looks like I am very easy to predict, am I not?”

Charlie then sighed as she walked over to her grandfather, sitting down beside him.

“Charlie? What’s wrong?” GM asked.

Charlie looked at him. “It’s Dad. He still won’t come out of his room 'cause…well-“

“Because I’m here.” GM sighed. “Yes. I gathered.”

Charlie then sat up. “I just…I get that he doesn’t like Heaven, but…does he really just want nothing to do with you? Our family?”

“…Charlie.” GM began. “What happened to Lucifer was…terrible. It was terrible of us to allow and he feels…betrayed. And rightfully so…”

He then sipped on his wine. “…truth be told, I don’t want to talk about it either. But I know we have to.”

“…why…why did you cast him out anyway?” Charlie asked. “I-I mean…I guess I know why, but…how did you feel? What was so bad that you banished him?”

GM took a deep breath. “…Charlie, the day I casted your father out was one of the worst days of my life-“

But then, the door opened and in walked Angel Dust himself. “Hey, guys. Look who’s back?”

Husk turned with a light grin. “Hey, An-“

But then, he suddenly went quiet when he saw Angel was wearing sunglasses. “…you…you okay?”

“Huh? O-oh, yeah! Yeah!” Angel laughed. “C’mon, I’m good…but I’m tired. Long day at work. Night, you guys.”

They all watched him leave, and just before Husk could open his mouth?

“He’s lying.” GM said. “…something’s wrong.”

Charlie turned. “Wait, what? What…oh…oh, I think I know…”

“…sh*t…that f*cking moth…” Husk snarled before standing. “I’ll go check on-“

“Allow me.” GM said, standing up from his seat. “We’ll talk later, Charlie. Keep Husk company for me, hmm?”

He then walked up the stairs and towards Angel’s room…and his four eyes widened in horror when he heard crying on the other side.

GM was silent as he listened to the desperate, muffled, and pained sobs. He then very slowly raised a hand and knocked. “…Anthony?”

“…y-yeah, Big G?”

“Is…everything alright?” GM asked.

“Y-yeah! You know me.” Angel said in a tone that showed he was clearly holding back his sobs. “It was just a long day…”

GM’s heart clenched. “…may I please come in? Angel, I…I know you’re not okay. And that is fine. I want to help.”

There was silence for a long moment…before the door slowly opened and Fat Nuggets was at the doorway.

GM smiled softly at the pig, watching him scamper back to his owner…but then his eyes widened in horror when he saw Angel Dust himself.

Angel was shirtless, but he had bruises across his body and a black eye, with tears still coming from all of his eyes, which were glowing pink and now properly showing. He was hugging himself with one set of his arms, while the others pet and held Fat Nuggets.

“…please close the door…I…I don’t want them to see me like this…”

GM quietly shut the door and then walked over, kneeling down. “…A-Anthony…what happened to you…?”

Angel didn’t say at first, he just tried to keep himself from crying even more.

GM’s heart practically shattered at the sound before he took off his cape and then very gently wrapped it around Angel. “…it’s okay…you don’t have to tell me…”

Angel then broke. He started to sob and cry into his hand as he wrapped the cape around him tightly, still holding his beloved pet.

Fat Nuggets nuzzled into his owner’s chest, trying to do whatever he could to comfort him.

And GM just waited patiently, sitting beside Angel to let him know that he wasn’t alone. And he wasn’t going to use his foresight to see what had happened no matter how much he wanted to.

Like he said before, he wouldn’t let himself know anything important about them unless they wanted him to.

Angel cried for what felt like forever before he finally spoke.

“…u-use your magic…I…I-I don’t wanna say… ”

GM’s four eyes then closed as he used his foresight…and when his eyes opened, they were filled with utter horror.

He had heard voices…pained cries…the sound of a fist pounding the ground desperately…the dark laughter of someone using the poor spider…a horrible slapping sound…and the smell of smoke…

“…oh, Anthony…” GM whispered. “I…I am so sorry…”

Angel choked out another sob before he suddenly hugged the Father of Heaven.

GM very gently hugged back, minding his bruises and wounds. “Shhh…just let it all out…you’re safe…”

Angel sobbed into his chest, even clutching at his suit and if it weren’t magic, he would’ve ruined it.

But GM didn’t really care about that…after seeing what had happened, all he cared about was Angel.

After what felt like ages, Angel began to speak again. “T-t-this is all my fault…I…I-I shouldn’t have…I-I should have-“

“No…no, this is not your fault.” GM said softly.

“Yes! Yes, it is!” Angel cried. “I-I fell for his f*cking flattery! I-I signed away my soul!!! A-and now I’m just...I’m just trapped!!! I-I put myself in there and…a-and I wanna be strong! I-I don’t wanna worry everyone…g-god, they have been through so much…m-my problems aren’t theirs. I…I just have to be better at taking it…I-I can’t let them worry-“

“Angel…please look at me.” GM said.

Angel obliged before very gently, GM wiped away his tears, trying to be careful of his black eye.

“Okay. Now follow my lead.” GM instructed. “…breathe in…and breathe out…”

Angel nodded slowly and inhaled, held his breath, and then exhaled.

“Very good. Breathe in…and then breathe out.” GM said, inhaling and exhaling alongside him. “Breathe in…and then breathe out. You’re doing great.”

Angel nodded as he kept continuing to breathe in and out.

“Okay…do you see Fat Nuggets?” GM asked.

Angel nodded as his beloved pig crawled into his lap.

“Just pet him. Hold him. He’s here for you and so am I.” GM said.

Angel very slowly began to pet his pig, nodding as he kept breathing in and out.

“…Angel, you are not a burden to anyone in this hotel.” GM said. “This was not your fault…he tricked you into signing away your soul…you didn’t think that it would be this bad…”

Angel just kept petting Fat Nuggets. “…but I still did it…”

“Yes…but we are here for you.” GM said. “You are so brave…do you know that?”

Angel sniffled. “…I just don’t wanna make them even more worried…Charlie and Vags are running this place…Nift’s got a lot to do every f*ckin’ day…Cherri still misses Pen…and…and Husk has enough on his mind…”

“But even so, you are not alone.” GM said. “They have their own issues, yes, but you have helped them…let us help you…can I heal your wounds?”

Angel nodded slowly…and then in less than a second, his black eye and bruises were all gone.

“…I hate him so much…” Angel sniffled. “I-I wish he would let me go…I-I wish I could just stay here with everyone…n-not have to get…used by him…but I-I don’t want to break myself…I wish he would just shrivel up and die…”

GM nodded slowly. “…you have done so much to better yourself, Angel…you feel you have thrown yourself into a hole that you can’t climb up from…but we’re here. It’s all going to be okay…”

Angel looked at him, looking like he desperately wanted to believe him. He then took a deep breath. “…are the others listening…?”

GM nodded. “…did they already know what he does to you?”

Angel nodded again before he looked at the door. “...can they come in…?"

GM used his magic to open the door…and sure enough? Charlie, Vaggie, Cherri, Nifty, and Husk were all at the door.

Angel sniffled as they all walked inside, and he used all of his arms to pull them into a hug. And they all hugged back.

GM could hear him mumble the words ‘I’m sorry’ to them, but they all just held and comforted Angel, reassuring him that he was indeed not alone.

Angel had fallen asleep, and Charlie gently shut the door as everyone else stood with her.

“…I’m gonna f*ckin’ kill Valentino.” Cherri said. “I’m gonna f*cking kill him!”

“Cherri, that…that might just make it worse. And you might get hurt. He’s an Overlord.” Vaggie said.

Husk then spoke up. “But we can’t just let this keep happening…if an Overlord dies, they may regenerate, but they lose their souls. I was one once. I know this sh*t.”

GM then spoke up. “…I’ll handle this.”

“Grandpa?” Charlie asked, turning towards him. “W…what do you mean?”

“Anthony may have put himself into this pit, but he now realizes what he has done and has done so much on his own to better himself…it’s time he finally receives a helping hand.” GM said. “…and I will not let what he did to you and Anthony slide…”

He then turned around and began walking. “Husk, my friend. Prepare me the strongest drink you’ve got when I return…”

“…why?” Husk asked.

“Because I’m about to show The Vees what happens when I choose to be a wrathful God again…”

Chapter 12: Episode 12: The Vees

Chapter Text

GM walked through the streets of Pentagram City, stopping traffic with a mere flick of his finger so he could keep walking without a care, not that anyone in Hell could hurt him even with their cars.

And to show his absolute fury, a thunderstorm started to grow in Hell. The red sky of The Pride Ring was covered in dark clouds and the thunder started to rumble louder and louder with every step The Father of Heaven took.

Then, lightning shot out and GM disappeared once it did, now at the doorstep of Vee Tower.

“…sheesh. Did Hell usually have storms?” Vox asked, looking outside.

Velvette was just texting on her phone before suddenly giggling. “Man, she’s insatiable.”

Vox turned. “Who is?”

“Uhh, what? f*ck off! No one!” Velvette said.

Vox rolled his eyes before looking out the window again, staring at the lightning striking from the dark clouds.

Then, the third Vee walked in. “Ugh, what the f*ck is going on?! I’m trying to get some sleep- Wait, did it always storm in Hell?”

Vox turned. “Yeah, that’s what I asked…and for some weird reason, I’m feeling uneasy.”

“Go spy on Alastor then to calm your nerves or something! Don’t you have drones around that sh*tty hotel?” Valentino asked.

Vox sighed. “That’s just it…everyone in the hotel keeps talking to someone that the drones can’t see. Even that old timey prick seemed…pissed off.”

Velvette laughed suddenly. “Wishing that was you?”

“Shut it, Velv!” Vox said. “I don’t give a flying f*ck if I’m the one messing with Alastor or not!!! As long as he’s out of my hair!!!”

“Mmm…we both know that’s a lie-“ Valentino said before a lightning bolt struck the ground, letting out a large boom and causing the power to go out.

Vox sighed. “Great. Just great-“

But then, the lightning struck again…only this time… inside the room, nearly hitting The Vees.

“ What the bloody hell?!? ” Velvette exclaimed, quickly jumping off the couch and backing up.

Vox backed up as well before the lights flickered on again. “… okay…this is-“

“Hello, Victor.” A voice said.

Vox’s eyes widened at the mention of his real name and he whipped around, jumping back with a yelp.

And then, there GM was, towering above them since he was only just slightly taller than Valentino.

“Who the f*ck are you!?” Valentino exclaimed, grabbing one of his guns and pointing it at GM.

GM looked at the gun before his four eyes glowed gold. “…so, you’re Valentino? I have to say…you’re even more disgusting up close.”

Valentino’s eye twitched. “Give me one good reason not to blow your goddamn-“

But suddenly, Valentino’s gun disappeared with another strike of lightning outside.

“Goddamn.” GM repeated. “Well. I am going to erase your damned existence…”

Vox then snorted. “Okay, Four Eyes! I don’t think you know who you’re talking to…so spill it! Who the hell are you?!”

GM sighed. “…I am the Lord of Heaven…and you’ve pissed me off … ”

The thunder and lightning struck again, as if to show how furious GM was.

Velvette then laughed. “Wait, wait…you’re saying you’re God or some sh*t?”

“That is correct.” GM said.

Vox then began laughing with his friend. “Oh! Oh, real nice! Real nice! A great scam!!! Telling us you’re God to try and scare us. How-“

GM then grabbed Vox’s arm and squeezed it tightly, with Vox’s entire arm suddenly glowing gold. “How’s this for a scam…?”

Vox suddenly began shrieking in utter agony as he immediately fell to his knees. His screams were horrible to listen to, and he was already crying from how much it hurt.

“If I squeezed any harder, I would shatter every bone in your body…and I’m not giving any effort.” GM said as he let go of Vox’s arm.

Vox’s arm stopped glowing and he held his arm, breathing heavily as he suffered the aftermath of the pain slowly fading. Emphasis on slowly.

Valentino then pulled another one of his guns and Velvette readied her own powers, with her phone glowing a bright red.

“Oh, you messed up-!”

“SILENCE!!!!” GM demanded as he lifted out his hand and chains made of literal lightning formed around The Vee’s necks, forcing them to fall to their knees.

And each of their chests were glowing…their very souls were glowing.

GM then took a deep breath. “…unlike you Overlords…I don’t need contracts or deals to gain someone’s soul… I simply will it into my possession. Doubt my identity all you want, but it won’t change a me-damn thing…you three will LISTEN.”

The electric chains then disappeared and The Vees all looked up at GM, absolutely horrified and practically trembling in terror. And they all screamed when another lightning bolt from outside came into the room and nearly hit all of them.

GM then crossed his arms, not even phased by the dangerous storm. “Valentino. Stand.”

Valentino didn’t dare disobey as he stood, shaking.

GM then grabbed Valentino by his face, lifting him up. “You…you are the very definition of a Sinner…you were destined to come here from the moment you burdened your mother with your birth.”

Valentino struggled and thrashed around, looking like he was on the verge of a panic attack.

“Scared? Like all the innocent souls you’ve terrorized?!” GM growled as he threw Valentino down, suddenly causing the floor to crack .

Valentino was even screaming in pain as well, as if the fall had somehow broken his back. He then tried to crawl away, but GM lifted a finger and stopped his hands from moving.

“In your life, you have committed every single Deadly Sin…” GM said. “You were prideful enough to think you would never pay for your crimes. You lusted after power and others, no matter how much they begged you to stop. You were greedy in every f*cking sense of the word. You were wrathful with the slightest annoyance or inconvenience, bloodying your hands with innocents. You envied others that you would ruin their lives so they would come crawling to you. You stuffed your face in such a gluttonous and disgusting manner and sat on your ass while everyone else worked.”

His eyes then glowed gold. “And you became even worse when you woke up here…my son made a fatal mistake leaving you alone…because now you have done the single worst thing you could ever do.”

He then picked up Valentino, forcing him to stare into his eyes.

“YOU PUT YOUR WRETCHED HANDS ON MY GRANDCHILDREN…” GM boomed as the lighting and thunder started striking with every single second that passed, almost like a timer. “YOU LAID YOUR FILTHY TONGUE ON CHARLIE AND YOU ABUSED ANTHONY TO NO END!!!”

Valentino couldn’t even speak , having the literal fear of God inside him.

“The only thing I’ll congratulate you for? You’ve become so horrid…that you’re actually worth my time.” GM said as his eyes glowed a bright gold once again. “ GOODBYE, VALENTINO. I WILL TAKE GREAT JOY IN REMEMBERING THIS MOMENT.”

He then punched Valentino high into the air and right through the roof of Vee Tower and into the sky.

And then, GM suddenly blasted Valentino with a devastating blast of holy light from his finger alone.

Valentino was hit with the blast…and then was hit with every lightning bolt the clouds had.

He was gone in seconds, with not even an ash left to fall from the sky…

Vox and Velvette were silent and left frozen in terror as they witnessed the demise of their partner.

GM then turned towards Vox and Velvette. “You two. Stand.”

Vox then found his words. “P-PLEASE!!! PLEASE DON’T-!”

“I’d find a replacement for that moth if I were you. He is not going to be regenerating.” GM said suddenly.

Velvette let out hysterical and terrified laughter. “I-I-I hated him anyway!!!”

GM sighed. “While you aren’t any better than your former partner…you serve a use to me.”

Vox nodded rapidly. “O-of course!!! Of course!!! We’ll do anything!!!”

“That’s what I was hoping you’d say.” GM huffed. “You two have a great influence over Hell…so, you will advertise the Hazbin Hotel. Let everyone know that redemption works. I have already asked Alastor to do the same for me and multiple sources will do nicely.”

Vox nodded again. “D-done!!! C-consider it the most popular place in Hell!!!”

“Good.” GM said. “And if I see either of you try to even insult my grandchildren… WHAT I’M GOING TO DO TO YOU TWO WILL BE INDESCRIBABLE!!! UNDERSTAND!?!?”

Vox and Velvette nodded so fast their necks hurt.

“Good… NOW GET TO WORK AND GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!!!” GM commanded.

Vox and Velvette dashed out of the room, running as fast as their legs could carry them.

GM then took a deep breath as he looked outside and saw the storm had stopped and the red skies of Hell were visible again.

He then ran his hand over his face before snapping his fingers and repairing all the damage caused by the various lightning strikes in and out of the building.

Then, GM formed a portal and stepped through, arriving back at the hotel and sitting down at the bar.

And sure enough, a cup of the strongest drink there was waiting for him.

“…well. Haven’t had to be Old Testament Me in a while.” GM sighed as he sipped the drink.

Then, Charlie, Vaggie, Cherri, and Husk walked into the room.

Charlie gasped. “Grandpa!”

GM smiled in relief as he set down the drink and turned around. “Charlie. Consider Angel a free man. He won’t have to go to work tomorrow.”

Charlie blinked. “…huh?”

Cherri and Vaggie’s eyes then widened and Husk suddenly grinned as wide as he could.

GM grinned to himself as he sipped on his drink again.

Chapter 13: Episode 13: The Overlords of Hell

Chapter Text

It had been a few days since GM personally exterminated an annoying bug…and needless to say, he didn’t think Angel could cry and smile more than he did once he realized he was free.

The soul known as Anthony was getting closer and closer to redemption. Now that he was free, it was only a matter of time.

However, in the time they had, GM still had a few more things to do…and thankfully, Charlie was still the source of pure hope and joy she always was, so she set her grandfather on another little journey alongside someone.

…someone he wasn’t particularly fond of though.

Alastor was silent as he walked alongside the Heavenly Father, his eye twitching.

GM just had his arms behind his back as they walked, the smile that was usually on his face now gone.

Eventually, they arrived at an elevator.

“…so, where are we again?” GM asked.

Alastor laughed. “Well, unlike you, I have meetings to attend!”

“And unlike you, I can exist at two places at once.” GM grinned. “So, I’m doing both meetings and staying in Hell.”

“HA! This coming from the person who has been doing nothing in the hotel except talking!”

“Haha! This coming from the person who thought The Radio Demon was an outstanding name…when it’s just okay .”

“HAHA! f*ck you.” Alastor snarled.

GM just grinned wide before they stepped into the elevator. “I only put up with you for my granddaughter’s sake…if you do anything to guide that pure soul into a path of darkness, you are going to find your owner merciful compared to me.”

Alastor laughed. “Why! I have no intention of doing so! But I am impressed how wrathful God can be! Is Wrath not a Sin?”

“Where do you think the feelings of wrath and sin came from?” GM asked. “I was the first to experience them. There’s a bit more to it, but I doubt you’re interested in storytime about the universe.”

Alastor grinned. “I’d rather not hear your voice any longer than necessary.”

Carmilla Carmine blinked as she stared at the tall ruler of Heaven sitting down at the table alongside several other Overlords. She then looked at Alastor. “…Alastor.”

“Ah, Carmilla! I suppose this has something to do with where I’ve been for the past seven years!”

“No.” Carmilla said. “I still don’t care.”

GM couldn’t help but snort, despite his form not having a nose.

“I was wondering why God is sitting right next to you.” Carmilla said.

GM blinked. “Oh! You actually recognize me!”

“Yeah, uhh, it didn’t take long to figure out after a few days ago…and how King Lucifer was just calling you ‘Dad’.” Zeezi, a dinosaur Overlord, said.

GM hummed. “I suppose that’s true! Well! It’s nice to meet some of Hell’s Overlords!”

“I did not expect you to be this…polite.” Carmilla said. “You are aware of what we are, yes?”

GM chuckled. “Yes, I know. And while I’m not exactly fond of the fact that you collect souls…I must also acknowledge that most of you don’t torture them and the souls did agree, thus putting them into their own mess. I can’t do every little thing for everybody.”

“Ah, yes! All the wars on Earth are proof of that! What a good job you’ve been doing!” Alastor smirked.

GM just smirked back. “Guns are a fascinating thing, are they not? I find them primitive…but I certainly approve if a gun is what killed you.”

“…oh, burn.” Zeezi muttered.

Carmilla just smirked to herself.

Rosie couldn’t help but laugh. “He’s got you there, Al! But, I must say! It’s a pleasure to meet God himself!!! You’re much skinnier than I thought you’d be! Do you need a snack?”

“As much as I love a good snack, I don’t think I’d be interested in any of the snacks you carry, Rosie.” GM said. “With all due respect.”

Rosie waved her hand. “Well! Can’t blame a girl for trying!”

GM then hummed before he noticed a particular Overlord at the table. He tilted his head. “Huh…excuse me, sir! Can I have your name?”

An Overlord with a skull for a head, antlers, and blue hellfire surrounding his face turned to GM…and said nothing.

GM blinked. “…did he hear me?”

“That’s Ignis.” Carmilla introduced. “He does not talk much.”

“I see. Well, it’s pleasant to meet you as well.” GM said with a tip of his hat.

Ignis once again said nothing.

Then, the door opened and a familiar cloaked figure with four green eyes and a spider-theme walked into the room. “Apologies for being late, Carmilla.”

Carmilla smiled. “Zestial. No need to worry. We have not started.”

GM then turned around and his four eyes widened at the sight of Zestial.

Zestial turned towards the Father of Creation…and then tilted his head. “Heavenly Father?”

“…Cain? Is that you?” GM asked, scratching his head.

All the Overlords immediately looked at Zestial, their eyes wide. Zestial’s life before his reign as an Overlord had always been a mystery and he was the oldest Overlord in all of Hell. Perhaps the very first Overlord.

Zestial hummed. “How fortunate that thou remembers me.”

“I’m just surprised you’re dead!” GM said. “How did you die? I had you wander the Earth for all eternity.”

“Thy punishment did not account for being slain.” Zestial said as he took a seat.

GM blinked. “I…see. Who killed you?”

“Mother.” Zestial said, nonchalantly.

GM sighed. “Right…not very surprising.”

“Twas not for my actions against Abel if thy are wondering…how is my naive sibling anyhow?”

GM hummed. “He’s doing quite well. He works as a farmer in Heaven, I believe- Wait, why are you talking like that?”

Zestial chuckled. “‘Tis ‘fun’ to do.”

Carmilla blinked. “…Zestial, you…never told me this.”

“I told thou about my past. Just not my name.” Zestial chuckled.

Alastor tilted his head. “And your name is Cain…as in Cain and Abel?”

Rosie nodded. “The children of Adam and Eve?”

Zestial sighed, looking unamused. “ Only by blood am I related to them… ”

GM patted his back. “I am very sorry that you have to be related to Adam of all people.”

“Are thou not responsible for Father’s birth from the Earth itself?”

“Certainly doesn't mean I’m proud of it.” GM sighed, rubbing his hand across his face. “Well…it’s good to see you’re doing good for yourself, Cain-“

Zestial held up a hand. “If you please. Do not refer to me by that wretched name any further.”

“Oh! Of course, Zestial.” GM nodded.

Then, voices started to talk from the door outside…two familiar ones. Especially to The Radio Demon and Heavenly Father.

“Why the hell are we going here of all places? To talk with a bunch of old f*ckers?”

“Look, I need something to get my mind off the fact that God himself killed Val, okay!? And I’m still trying to find a decent replacement! And that’s the thing! There’s way too many better than decent to choose from!”

Then, the doors opened and in walked Vox and Velvette…and they froze upon seeing GM.

GM smiled. “Hello again.”

Vox and Velvette immediately went to their knees and clasped their hands together as if they were praying. “OH, PLEASE DON’T KILL US!!!”

Zestial slowly turned to GM. “…thou have made yourself acquainted with them?”

“That’s one way of putting it.” GM chuckled.

Alastor leaned over. “Though you and I don’t get along, you’re going to have to tell me everything. ”

“With pleasure.” GM grinned.

After a usual meeting (with Vox being too scared of GM to start up his beef with Alastor), the two made their leave.

GM hummed. “I must say, I did not expect so many of the Overlords to be rather polite.”

“We aren’t savages.” Alastor grinned. “We are not folk to be looked down on either, Jehovah.”

GM was about to respond…before suddenly, holy chains suddenly wrapped around the Holy Father’s torso.

Then, a voice called. “M&M, I GOT HIM!!! START PULLING!!!”

“Oh, it appears I’m going through a kidnapping.” GM said as he let himself be pulled into the air.

Alastor watched as God himself was ‘taken’…before he just walked back to the hotel.

Chapter 14: Episode 14: I.M.P

Chapter Text

The Big G was thrown onto some kind of large meeting table, still tied up by holy chains. Then, a light was shone right into his face.

“Alright, bucko!” A voice cried. “You answer to us now, Four Eyes!”

“Sir, who even is this?!” Another voice asked.

“He’s really shiny.” Another one said.

GM then looked around and saw…three Imps and a single Hellhound texting on her phone.

Imps and Hellhounds were the lowest of low in Hell’s society. Demons with no supernatural powers in the slightest and often treated like pets or punching bags.

It was probably why Beelzebub turned into a Hellhound. She hated how terribly they were treated, but couldn’t really do much to help their social status despite her own.

“Shut up, Mox!” The first Imp with a white scar on his face cried. “And I…don’t actually know. I just saw him walking with King Lucifer, sooo…he’s gotta be important.”

“So, you asked us to kidnap him?!” ‘Mox’ cried.

GM then suddenly chuckled. “Oh, do not fret! I let this happen, I’ve never been kidnapped before! Is this what it’s like? I have to say, I expected it to be a lot more life-threatening.”

The first Imp blinked. “Oh! Oh, you want life-threatening?! Millie?!”

‘Millie’ then took out a giant chainsaw, starting it up with a psychotic grin.

GM…didn’t even look phased.

“…okay, damn.” The first Imp said. “Are you into this or-?”

“Gross.” GM said, his four eyes narrowing. “And no. I’m just not threatened.”

The first Imp groaned. “Well, f*ck! How are we supposed to ask you for sh*t if you aren’t scared enough to give it?!”

“What do you think I am?” GM asked.

‘Mox’ then went over. “I’m assuming a demon royal?”

“Demon?” GM repeated before laughing. “O-oh, no, no, no. I am far from a demon, Moxxie.”

Moxxie blinked and stepped back. “…okay. The strange white-suited man knows my name. That’s… concerning .”

Millie then walked over, suddenly nuzzling Moxxie. The two must’ve been together. “It’s alright, honey! I’ll f*ck him up if he tries anything!”

GM couldn’t help but smile at the love these two clearly had for each other before looking back at the first Imp. “So! Blitzo, was it?”

The first Imp groaned. “For f*ck’s sake, how does everyone know my goddamn name and still get it wrong?! The O is silent!”

“Oh! Apologies! Blitz.” GM nodded.

Blitz blinked. “…oh. Uhh…thanks.”

“Sir, if he’s not a demon royal, then maybe we should let him go.” Moxxie said.

“Oh, hell no! He’s still gotta be rich or powerful or something! He was just casually talking with Lucifer of all people!” Blitz cried. “I mean, that blondie hasn’t been seen out of his castle in…uhh…”

“Years?” Moxxie said.

Blitz nodded. “Yeah!”

“My boy really needs to go outside more.” GM hummed. “But for your information, I am not exactly rich . I’m not even from Hell.”

Blitz blinked. “Say what?”

The Hellhound then groaned. “Are you all f*cking blind? Look at him! He’s glowing and sh*t!!! He’s from Heaven!!!”

The three Imps then looked at GM and stood back. “Ohhhh…”

“I’m surprised you didn’t figure that out.” GM said, sitting up despite the chains. “But I suppose the eyes do make me look a little spooky, ha! But yes! I am from Heaven. I’m just here to visit my granddaughter and her hotel. As for why I was talking with Lucifer? Well, every father should be able to talk to their son once in a while.”

Blitz blinked. “…wait… son? ”

Millie turned. “Lucifer has a dad?”

Moxxie’s jaw then dropped, since he actually did some research on their King’s origins.

Blitz noticed. “Yo! Mox! You know something! f*cking spill it!”

“...ummm…s-sir…if what he’s saying is true…this is God.”

Blitz whipped his head towards GM. “Say what now?”

The Hellhound then looked at GM as well, her red eyes wide. “…no sh*t?”

“Perhaps I should’ve taken a form that was more recognizable. A lot of people can’t seem to tell who I am.” GM chuckled. “The beard is itchy though.”

Blitz was left there, trying to process who they were talking to. “…you’re telling us you’re God? And you’re real?”

“We’re talking, are we not?” GM asked.

Millie hummed. “Okie dokie! Prove it!”

GM nodded and then effortlessly shattered the holy chains into thousands of pieces, standing up properly.

Blitz’s eyes widened. “ HOW DID- “

He then walked over to the Hellhound. “Loona, was it? May I borrow this?”

Loona then watched him take her phone. “THE f*ck, DUDE!?”

GM then tossed the phone into the air…and when it landed, it was now some kind of technological demon or lifeform with a screen for a face.

The four stared in awe, looking the former phone up and down.

The screen on the lifeform then lit up. “You have one text from ‘Tex’.”

GM smiled as he did the ‘jazz hands’ towards the lifeform. “Eh? Eh? Pretty cool, right? Don’t worry, they’re not sentient.”

He then tossed the lifeform back into the air, turning it back into the phone and then handed it back to Loona.

Loona looked from her phone back to GM over and over again, still processing what had just happened.

“Your mini-computer is quite fascinating by the way.” GM said before turning to the imps. “Believe me now? If not, I have a musical number planned for this occasion-“

“No, no, no! We believe you!” Blitz said. “…f*ck, you just let us kidnap you, didn’t you?”

“I already said that.” GM chuckled. “No one could kidnap me if they tried.”

Moxxie gulped. “A-are you going to kill us?”

GM’s eyes widened. “Oh, heavens no! What reason would I have to-“

He then hummed as he used some of his foresight. “Hang on… you’re the four that have been killing people on Earth, aren’t you?”

Blitz laughed sheepishly, well aware of the power that God himself had. He was very likely bulletproof. “Uhhh… I-I mean, it’s just business! H-hahahaha…”

GM’s eyes narrowed a bit before he sighed. “While you deserve a punishment, I will not be killing any of you.”

Millie’s eyes widened. “Wait, seriously? But…we killed a lot of people.”

“Millie, sweetie, you’re not helping our case.” Moxxie said.

GM hummed. “While that is true…you are, at the end of the day, killing horrible people. Most of the Sinners that come to you had their lives ended by someone just as horrible as they were in life, and…as much as it breaks my heart, humans die everyday. Sometimes by natural causes, sometimes by a cruel hand of fate, an accident, or in this case…murder.”

Blitz blinked. “Okay, lemme get this straight. So, you aren’t mad?”

“I didn’t say that.” GM said.

They gulped.

“But, I’m just saying you all have a point. Demons work on Earth all the time and at the end of the day, you’re merely speeding up the process of a horrible person getting their deserved karma.” GM said. “…however…what I will not excuse is the fact that innocent people get caught in the crossfire.”

Blitz grinned sheepishly. “…d-do they now? I-I can’t think of a-“

“Spring Break, the opera, a minority of the DHORK Agents, the lumberjacks, Los Angeles, the campers, annnnd that one incident where you murdered a gang of crooks but a little boy had seen it all. That boy has not slept since.” GM said.

Moxxie tugged at his shirt collar. “W-when you put it like that, I…guess we haven’t exactly been careful lately.”

“Precisely, Moxxie.” GM said. “So, a punishment is in order. But until I decide what that is, why did you kidnap me anyway? To hold me ransom?”

Blitz rubbed the back of his neck. “…uhhh…personal sh*t.”

GM hummed. “Okay. That being?”

“I…needed you to get me a meeting with Prince Stolas.” Blitz said.

GM tilted his head before he closed his eyes and used his foresight to catch up on the relationship between this Imp and one of the Ars Goetia.

But, all four of his eyes snapped open once he was done. “…you f*cked up.”

Moxxie turned. “What!? Sir, you said it went okay!”

Blitz turned. “Well-“

“You both f*cked up.” GM said. “That confrontation could not have gone any worse- That’s a lie. It somehow could have gone worse.”

“Okay, I think we need an explanation!” Moxxie cried.

Blitz opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

GM sighed. “May I speak with your boss in private? I do not think he wants to tell you all the details…what I can tell you is your jobs are safe. This is something involving him and him alone.”

Moxxie and Millie looked at each other before looking back at GM.

“…I mean, you’re the big boss of the universe…do whatever the f*ck you want.” Loona said.

GM nodded before gesturing for Blitz to follow him into his office.

Blitz followed and then closed the door behind him. “…how badly did I f*ck up?”

“Very badly.” GM said.

Blitz sighed. “Great. Like that’s anything f*cking new…look! He just laid out this ‘feelings’ bullsh*t on me out of nowhere-!”

“It wasn’t just that night.” GM said. “Your entire relationship with Stolas has been unhealthy from the start…and both of you are at fault. Albeit, unintentionally due to your poor communication skills.”

Blitz blinked. “…okay, that’s one way of putting it.”

GM sighed. “Blitz…you used him. You were after his book and you made him believe that you were there for him after he had gone through a lifetime of arranged misery. And then, you used him again at Ozzie’s.”

“…sh*t, I…guess I did.” Blitz muttered.

GM’s eyes then softened. “And then you assumed that all he wanted out of you was sex and nothing else. And yes, he did treat you like his plaything instead of an equal and he is at fault for that…but he isn’t like the other Royals. And deep down, you know that not all Royals are the same. Stolas is a perfect example.”

Blitz sighed. “C’mon, how?”

“You don’t even believe your own words right now.” GM said. “His texts in the form of paragraphs, his small gestures to show he cares…and him giving you that Asmodean Crystal so you can continue your business without your horrible deal. He cares for you, Blitz…you were just too blind to notice…because you don’t think you are capable of being loved.”

Blitz then sat down, his eyes narrowing. “…if you’re all-knowing or some sh*t, you should know why I’m not.”

“I have seen your life, Blitz…and while I do see a man pushing others away…I also see a man who is only doing that because of his own self-loathing. You are not as horrible as you think you are.”

Blitz gritted his teeth a bit. “How do you know?”

GM smiled kindly. “Fizzarolli was one of your first and greatest mistakes…yet. You’re friends with him again after all these years. You also gave Moxxie and Millie a job so they can support each other and be together, even helping save Moxxie from a Mafia wedding. You gave Loona a home and while much like you, she doesn’t like to show it…deep down, she truly appreciates it. You made her feel wanted in a world that tossed her aside…and as Stolas said himself? You made him happy…and you feel the same way. That’s why this is hurting you so much.”

Blitz was left silent, looking down.

GM then sat down on a chair he summoned. “You should not have assumed that his feelings were fake. You should not have used him or assumed that all Royals are the same because much like you and me, we’re all different deep down. And you should not have blown up at him either, despite the fact that admittedly, you were acting off pure emotion and I can’t really blame you for yelling…much like you don’t know him, Stolas doesn’t know you. ”

Blitz then took a deep breath as he felt some tears in his eyes before he quickly wiped them away. “…then what the f*ck do I do? I-I just hurt him again like I always do…h-how do I stop being this way?”

GM’s eyes softened again. “You need to realize that everyone is capable of change and love. You are capable of giving love, which means you are capable of receiving it. You have hurt people, but use Fizz as a perfect example that you can make amends to those you have wronged.”

“…how do you know if that will work…?”

“You don’t feel so bad about Fizz anymore, do you?” GM smiled. “What happened to him as an accident, and you both understand that now…maybe try apologizing to others such as Verosika. As my granddaughter says, sorry is where it starts.”

“And if they don’t forgive me?”

“You shouldn’t expect that.” GM sighed. “Their feelings are valid…but you need to show them that you have changed. That you understand what you did to them was wrong…and you might be surprised what happens.”

“…but-“

“Blitz…if you want to move on from the past, you can’t stay in it. You need to see that you can do just as much good as you can bad. Everyone has the capacity for change…and you clearly want to. You just have to take that first step.”

“…and what about Stolas?”

GM sighed. “I honestly think you need to better yourself first before you try and have such a serious relationship with him. And remember, Stolas is just as much at fault here as you are…I won’t be getting you a meeting with him, but I will talk with him.”

Blitz rubbed his hand across his face before he nodded. “…okay.”

GM then stood. “I will be assigning you a therapist though. I may have a way with words, but one talk between you and I isn’t going to magically change things for the better.”

Blitz scoffed a bit. “You hardly know me and you do that? Didn’t you just go on a tangent earlier about how you were mad at me for killing people?”

“I am still cross about that, but I think you will be more careful from now on. And if not, your eventual punishment is just going to be worse.” GM shrugged. “But it won’t be death or the end of your business, I can assure you that. I’m well aware Imps are not exactly in a great position financially.”

They then began walking towards the door with GM looking at him. “Remember what I said, Blitz…everyone is capable of love. Both giving and receiving.”

Blitz was still silent as they walked back into the office, where Moxxie, Millie, and Loona were waiting.

“Well! I shall be off!” GM smiled.

Moxxie turned. “Ummm, Mr. God?”

“Please. Mr. God was my father. Call me Big G.” GM grinned.

Moxxie blinked. “… you have a dad?”

“No, I just always wanted to make that joke.”

“Oh…well. I just wanted to apologize for our kidnap attempt.”

GM chuckled. “You wear your heart on your sleeve, Moxxie. Apology accepted! Oh, and Loona?”

Loona turned. “Yeah?”

“Stop calling him fat. Moxxie has enough self-insecurity and you do too.” GM said before facing Millie. “And Millie?”

Millie tilted her head.

“Call your family more often.” GM said.

And then, with a tip of his hat, The Father of Heaven went out the door.

“…that went well.” Moxxie hummed.

GM then peeked in. “I’ve just come up with a punishment!!!”

He then snapped his fingers…and in the room materialized a dark red and black demonic horse with almost needle like legs suddenly appeared.

“…SPINDLE?!” Blitz squealed.

“Everytime you kill an innocent, your former pet will do this!”

Spindle then headbutted each of them, causing them to groan in pain as they laid on the floor.

“Alrighty then! Farewell!” GM said as he left.

Chapter 15: Episode 15: Stolas

Chapter Text

GM walked right through a portal and arrived at a large palace. He was familiar with the Ars Goetia family. If he recalled correctly, they were descendants of Asmodeus himself.

Then again, he could easily be wrong.

GM hummed as he walked right through, the doors even opening for him thanks to a bit of his magic…and much to his surprise, the palace was… empty.

Much of the furniture wasn’t there, and there were spots across the walls that showed large photos were there, but had been taken off.

“…well. This is certainly welcoming for depression.” GM hummed before hearing footsteps and looking down to see a small Imp, likely a servant.

The servant’s eyes widened at the sight of God himself and blinked. “…uhhh-“

“Hello!” GM smiled. “Do you know where Prince Stolas is?”

“He’s…at the balcony.” The servant said. “Is this another assassination attempt?”

“No, my small friend, it is not.” GM said. “How about you take the rest of the night off? You look exhausted.”

“…I’m not sure I-“

GM then snapped his fingers and suddenly, the servant’s hands were filled with money.

“Consider it a bonus.” GM said with a kind smile.

The servant's eyes lit up before he quickly ran off. “Thank you!!!”

“Drive safe!” GM called before chuckling. “He was very sweet.”

He then walked through the empty palace, occasionally cleaning up some of the smashed pots and dishes along the way. But, he eventually made his way to the balcony…where the Prince of the Goetia Family himself was leaning forward, looking out into the city.

GM then walked over. “You know, there is a lot of red here.”

Stolas yelped, whipping around. He then blinked. “…who are you?”

“I’m just someone passing through.” GM said, tipping his hat as he walked over. “You can call me God or Big G or Grandpa Morningstar or the variety of names I have. And you must be Prince Stolas! It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“It’s nice to-“ Stolas then blinked. “Wait, did you just say your name was…God?”

“Correct.”

“…as in Heaven’s God?”

“Correct again.”

“The one who created everything? That God?”

“You’re on fire today!” GM smiled. “That’s what the kids say, right? I’m not very ‘hip’.”

Stolas was left utterly speechless as he stared at GM. He then rubbed all four of his eyes. “…am I dreaming?”

“No, you are not.” GM said. “But worry not, I really am just passing through. I’m on my way back to my granddaughter and her friends. She has a hotel, you see! And now, I’m just doing a favor for a friend. That favor is talking to you…and you look like you need it.”

Stolas looked down for a moment before looking back at him. “…I…suppose I haven’t talked to anyone in a while…”

GM smiled before looking back out at the city with him, as if they were just old friends looking out into space together. “…how are you doing, Stolas?”

“…not good…” Stolas said with a deep breath. “I…I-I’m at a loss if I’m being honest…my divorce has been finalized, but…I’m not happy about it. I’m just glad my daughter doesn’t have to see her father like this.”

GM turned. “You’re a father too, hmm?”

Stolas nodded. “And you?”

“I have 9 children.” GM chuckled. “They and all of Heaven look at me like I have all the answers, and…well, perhaps I did once. Certainly not anymore though. When you’re young, you look at your parents as if they know all and they can guide you to the future…but as you grow up, you see that they don’t have all the answers. That they are just trying their best.”

Stolas gave a weak chuckle. “…I’m not sure if my best is enough for mine.”

“You doubt yourself too much, Stolas.” GM said. “You love your daughter and you tried to give her the life you never had. That speaks volumes. She may not realize that yet, but give it time. And just continue doing your best.”

Stolas slowly turned towards GM. “…how did-“

“All-seeing and all-hearing isn’t an expression, you know.” GM chuckled. “I can shut off my omniscience as much as I can turn it right back on.”

Stolas hummed and nodded. “…so…who is the friend you’re doing a favor for?”

“I think you know him.” GM said. “Mr. Buckso himself. The head of I.M.P.”

Stolas’ eyes widened and he stood up straight immediately. “…Blitz?”

GM nodded. “He attempted to kidnap me in the thoughts that I was a demon royal and could get him a meeting with you.”

“…h-he…he wants to see me…?” Stolas whispered.

GM turned. “Yes…but right now, that is not what you both need . I saw your entire relationship and you were right, it wasn’t healthy. And I admire your approach to try and make it better.”

“…but it still didn’t work…” Stolas said.

GM sighed. “It was never going to.”

Stolas’ eyes widened and he looked right at The Father of Creation. “Huh?”

“Stolas, you admire Blitz because he gave you this sense of freedom and choice you never had. You admired his humor and how he could make you laugh.” GM said. “But…that’s all you really know about him.”

Stolas looked down again. “I…I suppose that's true…”

“I’m not saying that your relationship’s downfall was solely your fault. It isn’t. It’s both of yours. I want to make that clear.” GM said, facing him properly. “He should not have used you or assumed your feelings were fake…but you should never have made that deal in the first place. You may see him as an equal, but he did not see it that way.”

Stolas turned. “B…but I tried! I tried to make him see that I…I cared about him. That I wanted to make us work…”

“You did…but everytime it seemed like he was uncomfortable with the topic of talking, you would back down.” GM said. “You don’t have enough confidence in yourself. You can’t just tiptoe your way around things like this…relationships, especially romance, is nothing like the soap operas you watch. A grand romantic gesture is nice, but…following those everytime is just guaranteed heartbreak.”

Stolas took a deep breath and leaned against the balcony again, looking at the red city across from them. “…why do these feelings have to be so complicated…?”

“Because people are complicated.” GM said. “Stolas…you said that Blitz made it all about sex, but it was you who started the deal in the first place. You also need to realize that you not standing by his side at Ozzie’s… hurt him. Your gestures were not obvious to him…”

The Goetian Prince was left silent, already feeling tears at his eyes.

“…because he hates himself too much to even process that anyone could love him. That’s why he acted the way he did when you told him.”

Stolas’ teary eyes widened and he looked at him. “What?”

“Granted, you did just drop your feelings right there and then…but the important factor as to why he acted the way he did is because he hates himself…Blitz has been through so much that it ended in self-loathing to the point where he thinks everyone would be better off without him. That he just makes people worse.”

“I…I didn’t know that…”

GM turned. “And given his poor communication skills alongside yours? You probably would never have found out…your relationship can’t work, Stolas. Not yet.”

Stolas felt his heart break a little more at the sound of that and he took a deep breath.

“…but it can.” GM said suddenly. “You and Blitz need to learn to love yourselves first. And above all, apologize when you see each other again. Blitz does have feelings for you, Stolas…but neither of you are ready for such a serious commitment.”

Stolas was clearly taken aback by the fact that the Holy Father himself just said the one he had fallen for actually fell for him too.

“So, just be patient. With him and yourself.” GM reassured, giving a kind smile. “Keep that in mind…and neither of you are going to pass away alone as you fear.”

Stolas took a moment to process GM’s words before looking at him. “…so… how do I do that…? ”

“For one, I’m getting you a therapist.” GM chuckled. “But…that part I can’t exactly tell you how to do. Much like the love you feel for Blitz, this is something that can’t just be explained like a teacher giving you a lesson. In short, you’re going to have to find out yourself…”

Stolas sighed. “I guess I should have expected that…but…thank you. I-I’ll admit, it… helps to talk about this.”

GM smiled and then gently set a hand on his. “It does, does it not?”

Then, the Heavenly Father looked up at the sky…as music suddenly filled the air once again.

“~There are shouters and murmurers, loan sharks and burglars. Who is good or bad, whose to say?~” GM sang. “~Some are lost, some are searchers, some are givers, some are earners! But why do they all end up that way?~”

Stolas quickly tuned to GM again, now just surprised that he was singing. Especially since he liked to sing his own woes often.

“~Is it nature at play or is it nurture? Is the teacher to blame or is the learner? I’m all at sea, I’m no authority on anything but me ~” GM sang before he leapt onto the balcony and then leapt into the sky, standing on air as if it were the ground.

Stolas’ eyes widened a bit as he stood back as the music started to turn from a soft piano to that of a whimsical tune.

“~I couldn’t tell you why I am who I’ve become! But I can tell you the parts that make me up! And you can calculate the sum! I’ll empart to you what I believe would be the recipe for me!!!~”

Then, the two were suddenly surrounded in the breathtaking beauty of a galaxy, filled with golden stardust. Stolas looked around before seeing light wave around him like waves of water.

“~Power! First things first, you’ll need a great deal of power to make me!~” GM grinned as formed an orb of light in his hands. “~60 liters is less than you need! Power’s 65 percent of my being!~”

He then threw his hands into the air, with more light and even stars shooting out from his fingertips alone. “~And light! My body’s composed of trillions and trillions of lights, performing an assortment of missions that’s important to mention that I made the light of day to help make myself!~”

Stolas couldn’t help but… smile at the display, especially as he was suddenly carried into the sky alongside GM.

“~There’s an ebb and a flow! I grow, then I see changes! There are rewrites, losses, gains and rearrangements! It’s all much more uncertain than I thought it would be! Who knew there’d be so many ways to be me?~”

He then took Stolas’ hands and spun him around as they were faced with the planet Earth, with Heaven and Hell right above and below it respectively.

They then zoomed in, and began to see the various stories and tales that have happened on the planet. Be it fictional or real. Be it fantastical or realistic. Complicated or simple.

“~Stories! Audience or presenter, add scores of stories over time! A slew of silly tales that are online and journals full of narratives wrote at age 9! And still! They continue to write because they have more dreams to fulfill!~” GM grinned. “~I’ve made many tales when I was younger, some I haven’t made yet, but I will! I’ll find my way with my will!~”

Next thing they knew, they were back in Hell…but now hovering above all Seven Rings of it.

“~There’s an ebb and a flow! I grow, then I see changes! There are rewrites, losses, gains and rearrangements! I’m so much more uncertain than I thought I would be! Who knew there’d be so many ways to be me?~” GM grinned as they started flying from one ring to the next, witnessing the many lives inside of it: good and bad.

Stolas was almost in awe of it all. He knew it all existed, but…perhaps he should leave the palace a bit more. Just a bit.

“~Eggs. You may laugh and that’s great, your smiles are what make my day~”

“~…my self worth’s fragile like an egg, when it breaks, it’s tough to put together again~” Stolas sang, now joining in on the song. “~A pinch of salt in my wounds when others have had enough of me. It doesn’t help that I’m lacking subtlety when I drop hints that I crave their company~”

“~Alone~” GM sang. “~It’s hard to console myself when I feel so alone~”

“~I feel like I’ll disappear if I don’t shout ‘I’m here’! If I don’t make my presence known…and if people see me here~”

“~And find my face unclear! Can I help them to see me better?~” GM said, starting to grin triumphantly. “~I may foresee the weather, but will they accept me now or ever? Who knows?~”

“~I hope so~” Stolas whispered.

GM then set a hand on his shoulder. “~But we’re good enough! Whatever we face, you can rest assured that better days await! The path to happiness isn’t a race!~”

“~I’ll let my heart beat at its own pace!~” Stolas sang, finally smiling just as much as The Father of Heaven.

The two then took off into the air, leaving behind various trails of stardust behind them.

GM laughed as he spun around in the air. “~Sunshine! Happy and bright, it nurtures the realms with its light! Its beaming smile helps buds to flower!~”

“~I’ll take a dash of that for when I feel sour!~”

“~And rainbows, a light shines through and every hue is on display!~” GM added as a rainbow came from his hands and he even painted it across Stolas’ face as a not so subtle gesture at his sexuality. “~Save a pinch of that for a rainy day! And use it when the storm clouds go away!~”

The two then finally arrived back to the Pride Ring, seeing Stolas’ palace close by.

GM grinned wide as he looked at Stolas. “~There’s an ebb and a flow! I grow, so I make changes! There are rewrites, losses, gains and rearrangements! It’s all much more uncertain than I thought it would be! But I can see there’s no wrong way to be me!~”

“~Now I see there’s no wrong way to be me!~” Stolas sang as the two landed back on the balcony.

GM took a bow and then tipped his hat. “~Now I know putting this recipe to paper is unwise! All of the ingredients are changing all the time! I know putting this recipe to paper is unwise! All of the ingredients are changing all the time! Changing all the time! They’re changing all the time! Changing all the time, I’m changing all the tiiiime!~”

Stolas couldn’t help but clap a little.

GM chuckled. “Remember my words. Remember your faults…and take care of yourself. Alright?”

“…I will try.”

“That’s all I ask.” GM smiled. “I have my own faults to handle…farewell, Stolas.”

“Farewell, Heavenly Father.”

Chapter 16: Episode 16: Lucifer

Chapter Text

GM walked right through a portal and into the hotel. “I’m back!”

Charlie dropped her phone and rushed over, hugging her grandfather tightly. “GRANDPA!!! OH, THANK…YOU!!!”

GM’s eyes softened and he patted his granddaughter’s head. “You weren’t that worried, were you?”

Vaggie went over. “Alastor just told us you got kidnapped and-“

“It was a misunderstanding. I handled it.” GM said, looking down at his granddaughter and Vaggie. “But still. I am sorry for worrying any of you.”

Angel then walked down, having been talking with Husk and Cherri. He then gasped. “Big G! You’re back!”

“And with quite the story to tell!” GM chuckled as his granddaughter finally let go.

Charlie then smiled. “I’m just happy you’re okay…”

GM’s eyes softened and he held Charlie’s shoulder. “You’re my granddaughter, Charlie. My family…I do whatever I can for my family.”

Charlie smiled, but it faded when her grandfather’s did the same. “Grandpa…?”

“That…does remind me. I can’t put this off any longer.” GM said. “Where’s Lucifer? We need to talk.”

Husk’s eyes widened. “Oh, sh*t.”

Cherri hummed. “This could go really well…or really f*ckin’ badly.”

“Lucifer’s in his room.” Vaggie said. “I can go get-“

“No need.” GM said with a sigh. “This is something I need to do alone…but, how about you show everyone that new sport you’ve been playing, Vaggie? Could make a nice group activity.”

Charlie turned to her girlfriend. “Sport?”

Vaggie laughed, rubbing the back of her neck. “Uhhh…yeah! Your grandpa suggested I find a hobby. Been working out and trying to get in the zone and such!”

“Bet Charlie really likes that.” Angel and Cherri said in unison before grinning at each other.

As the banter between them all continued, GM began walking upstairs. He had to admit…he was scared.

He hadn’t been scared in a while. There wasn’t much that could scare him.

Eventually, he made it. GM took a deep breath, trying to remind himself of all the advice he had given to others.

Then, he slowly knocked on the door. “Lucifer? It’s…it’s your father. We… we need to talk.”

“Uhhh, I’m busy, Dad!”

GM sighed. “I know you’re trying to avoid this, but…please. I can’t bear this anymore. We haven’t spoken a word to each other in millennia. I…I have missed so much of your life. Your brothers miss you, your sisters miss you, I miss you…son.”

Suddenly, GM was now the one being teleported into the room.

Lucifer was sitting across from him, his eyes suddenly glowing red. He stood from his seat. “Son? I stopped being your son ever since Eden.”

GM’s heart clenched. “Lu-“

“No. You’re going to stay quiet.” Lucifer snarled.

GM nodded.

Lucifer’s horns were slowly starting to grow in as the glow in his eyes turned to a blood red. “…you all looked down on me in Heaven. I just wanted to help Creation!!! I wanted to help humanity!!! I wanted to create more!!! I wanted to be like you!!! But no! You and all the Heavenly Elders just shot down every idea I ever suggested!!! And you just sat and watched as your own kid just ran away and cried, thinking everyone hated him and his dumb ideas!!! But I didn’t give up!”

“… no…no, you didn’t ”

“You’re damn right I didn’t! ” Lucifer growled. “Even my own siblings thought all my ideas were stupid!!! Do you know what it’s like for your home to not be… home? And don’t even get me started on Michael!!! Admit it!!! He was always your favorite!!!”

“…I didn’t have a favorite, Lucifer.”

Lucifer just laughed, almost manically. “Bullsh*t! Everyone always bragged about him! Oh, Michael and his perfect record! His perfect creations! His perfect powers! I was just the troublemaker with his face! I bet that’s why everyone in The Council hated me! Cause I looked too much like the kid of yours they wanted around! And then…then you created Eden. And from there, Adam and Lilith were made… Lily listened, Dad.”

“She did…”

“She was the only one who listened!!! She liked my ideas!!! And the ones she didn’t like? She would improve!!! She wouldn’t just shut me down!!!” Lucifer yelled. “You…you just let Adam control her!!! She ran off because he was a selfish piece of sh*t, and then you just replaced her! Lilith was my everything, Dad!!! I loved her because she was the only one who really cared… a-and maybe she didn’t…"

Lucifer wiped his eyes. “Maybe I wasn’t good enough and that’s why she left…but she made me happy!!! We were going to change the world together!!!”

GM looked at his son, not even saying a word this time.

“We wanted to kickstart our dream by giving Eve free will!!! Something you never gave her!!!” Lucifer screamed. “I didn’t know that f*cking apple would do that to her!!! AND YOU ALL BLAMED ME FOR IT!!! AND THAT POMPOUS, EGOTISTICAL TWIN OF MINE RAN OFF TO YOU TO GET LILY IN TROUBLE TOO!!!”

Lucifer’s wings then spread wide. “And when I talked back? Ohohoho, when I talked back…YOU FOUGHT ME. MY OWN FAMILY PULLED SWORDS AND SPEARS AS IF I WAS SOME MONSTER!!! AND THEN ONCE I WON THE FIGHT, YOU BANISHED ME!!! LOOKED ME IN THE EYE AND TOLD ME WHAT WAS GOING TO FALL!!! I HAD TO SHIELD LILITH WITH MY OWN DAMN BODY!!!”

He stepped towards his father. “I MAY HAVE FELT UNHAPPY, BUT YOU WERE STILL MY FAMILY!!! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURTS WHEN YOUR OWN FAMILY HATES YOU!?! STARTS UP A STORY TO EVERYONE IN EXISTENCE THAT I’M THE BAD GUY!?! THAT MY MISTAKE WAS INTENTIONAL?!? YOU GAVE ME A KINGDOM I HATED!!! I WAS FORCED TO SEE HOW BAD HUMANS COULD BE THANKS TO WHAT I DID…I GOT THE MESSAGE THE FIRST HUNDRED TIMES, DAD!!!”

GM slowly took off his hat.

“And then, after leaving me with this wasteland of death and carnage…one of the only lights in my life fades away. ” Lucifer whispered. “ All I had was my little girl!!! MY little girl!!! I wasn’t a good dad!!! I’ll admit that!!! You could say I learned from you!!! BUT I AT LEAST KEPT HER SAFE!!! And now that she’s succeeding, you come down!!! Acting like nothing’s changed!!! SO NO!!! YOU DON’T GET TO CALL ME ‘SON’, AND I DON’T EVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!!! DO YOU HEAR ME, HEAVENLY FATHER?!?! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT!?!?”

“…you were right.”

Lucifer’s eyes widened. “…what?”

GM took a shaky breath as the words of his son settled in. “You were right , Lucifer…the humans should have had free will from the start. Adam should have treated Lilith as his equal…Eden and Earth were supposed to be a paradise, but it was just a beautiful prison…I shouldn’t have blamed you for what happened to Eve…that apple didn’t corrupt her, it gave her the choice to be evil and introduce Sin into the world… and that’s what she chose… I should have never made that damn fruit…”

Lucifer slowly stepped back, just looking at his father, confused.

“I should have been there for you. I should have made you feel at home when you weren’t! Heaven was supposed to be your home, but you didn’t feel happy there!” GM cried. “I didn’t realize how happy Lilith made you until it was too late! That’s why I wanted Hell to give Sinners the choice to redeem people! So you could see the good that came out of what you did!!! Lucifer, you have done so much good for humanity by giving them free will and I didn’t let you see that…Heaven didn’t let you and I’m sorry… ”

“…I don’t get it… ” Lucifer said. “…what changed?”

GM gave a weak laugh, but it sounded like he was on the verge of breaking down into tears. “Do you want to know what I did after your fall…? I went into my office…and cried . I filled entire oceans with my tears because I had just banished my own child into Hell! And there’s nothing I can do to change that…it’s my greatest regret.”

He then took another deep breath. “Lucifer, what you did was bad, but I shouldn’t have punished you so severely! I shouldn’t have punished Lilith so severely! But I let my anger and fear get the better of me…the humans say I have this great plan and that’s why all of these horrible things happen: I don’t. I had a plan once, but after you fell, I…I realized how flawed it truly was. That’s when I realized that nothing is perfect! Especially not me…and then your baby brother, Jesus, was born…and then crucified . I had to watch another one of my children suffer because I was too scared…but he at the very least got resurrected! You were still stuck here! So, you’re right! I gave you this hellhole! Perhaps I’m the one who should be blamed for what happened!”

Lucifer’s eyes widened at that and he froze.

“…so, I’m sorry… ” GM said, his four eyes finally watering with tears. “…I failed Heaven as a ruler and I failed you as a father and I even failed Charlie as her grandfather. I’ve missed 200 years of her life!!! No matter what I give, that will never make up or get back what I’ve missed…”

He then placed his hat back onto his head. “…but I want- I need you to know something…”

“…what…what’s that…?”

GM then looked his son right in the eye. “…I love you, son. Even after your fall, I never stopped loving you or your siblings…and I am so proud of the man you’ve become. You’ve messed up and you aren’t perfect…but you are making amends. And that’s more than I could ever hope for with you after what I did and allowed to happen.”

Then, the Heavenly Father turned towards the door. “…I’ll return to Heaven tomorrow and say my goodbyes to everyone…you won’t ever have to see me again.”

But as GM reached for the doorknob, Lucifer stepped forward.

“D-Dad, wait!” Lucifer cried. “I…I…”

GM slowly turned back towards his son.

“…I-I can’t forgive you yet even after all that, I…I need time to think about that.” Lucifer said. “But…I don’t want you to leave.”

GM’s eyes widened. “…you…don’t?”

“I-I mean…you probably gotta go back to Heaven, but…I-I don’t want you to never come back.” Lucifer said. “I-I’m still mad at you and the others, but…it was over 10,000 years ago. I…I miss my family…and I miss my dad. The dad who did care about me and showed me what it was like to dream . The dad who…who still saw me as an equal despite all the power he had.”

GM walked over to his son. “…you always were the strongest of Heaven…right beside Michael, but even back then, he struggled…and he misses you just as much as me…”

Lucifer looked up at his father, suddenly sniffling and wiping his eyes as if he was younger again and crying because of a bad dream or because of his hurt feelings. “...you really do miss me?”

GM knelt down. “More than anything…”

Lucifer looked down for a moment before he clenched his fists…and then pulled his father into a hug, his tophat falling off his head.

GM immediately hugged back as he held his son closer, finally letting himself… cry.

“…I-I still don’t forgive you…” Lucifer sniffled.

GM let out a laugh and a cry. “I-I know…”

“…but this is a start…”

Chapter 17: Episode 17: Lilith

Chapter Text

Meanwhile in Heaven…

The Queen of Hell rested on her beach chair as the waves of Heaven’s oceans washed onto shore. She had a cup of wine in her hand and a pair of sunglasses on her face.

And then, a shadow loomed over her, blocking out her sun.

Lilith took off her sunglasses and set her cup down. “…I was wondering how long it would take for you to find me.”

“I always knew you were here, Lilith. I was simply occupied with my duties.” GM said as he walked over, now standing beside her.

Lilith sat up. “Let me guess. You’re going to kick me out now?”

“No.” GM said. “But I am curious…how and why did you get here? If you’re willing to tell me and satiate my curiosity.”

Lilith chuckled. “For once, the Heavenly Father asks something of me instead of forcing me to tell him.”

“I’m not that God anymore, Lilith.” GM said, facing her. “And…I’m sorry for what I had you do back in Eden.”

Lilith looked into her cup. “Even if I hadn’t met Luci…I would’ve ran off and probably found Hell anyway. You merely sped up the discovery…I’ve gotten over it. What I haven’t gotten over is what you did to him…”

“As we speak, I am with him while talking to you. Being all powerful has its perks.” GM said.

“That won’t exactly change the fact that you still did it…”

“No. It will not…so, how and why did you get up here in Heaven?”

Lilith sighed. “Did Michael or Lute not say?”

“I have a feeling they didn’t know. And why waste my time with speculation when I can go straight for the source?” GM asked.

Lilith hummed before she grabbed her cup of wine and sipped on it…before chugging it down. “I made a deal with Adam. I would be allowed up here in secret in exchange for his Exterminations to go off without a hitch.”

“I thought Lucifer approved them?”

“He did, but I was one of, if not the biggest threat to them. Considering what I was doing for my people.” Lilith said. “Thankfully, the bastard didn’t try anything. For once, he was too occupied with that Exorcist of his. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he had genuine feelings for her beyond the urge to bed her.”

GM sighed. “Adam wasn’t a very hard man to please…but now thankfully, he’s dead.”

Lilith grinned a bit as she used her powers to refill her cup. “I’ll drink to that.”

“…and has now regenerated in Hell.” GM said.

Lilith hummed. “I suppose his soul had to go somewhere… kill him again for me, would you?”

“Why kill him when a life in Hell after a lifetime in Heaven is punishment enough?”

Lilith grinned. “My, my, father-in-law. You say something like that with claims of not being your old self?”

“Oh, hush.” GM sighed. “But, that doesn’t answer the ‘why’ question…you were a queen in Hell. Everyone bowed to you and respected you. You had a daughter who looked up to you and you had a husband who loved you…you made him happier than I ever could…”

Lilith was dead silent at that as she looked down at her cup again. She then dumped it and tossed the glass aside. “…did I?”

GM turned, tilting his head.

“You’re right. I was a queen in control of my own fate. I ruled over Sinners and Hellborn, empowering them and even encouraging them with my voice alone…and I punished those who truly deserved eternal damnation. I had a family whom I would walk every single realm and planet in the universe for. A husband who loved me for all of me and a daughter who I could guide and love…a daughter who was a miracle after so many attempts at having a child…Hell was my kingdom. It was my home, my…my own Eden.”

“…so, why did you leave it all behind? And for seven years? I doubt the beaches here are this nice.”

Lilith chuckled. “You’re right. They aren’t…”

“So why-“

“Because they were both better off without me.” Lilith said before she sighed. “…when we made Hell, I promised Luci that it would be our fresh start. Our new beginning…but no matter how hard I tried, no matter what songs I sang, no matter what I did to show I loved him… he wasn’t happy.”

GM’s eyes softened.

Lilith held out her hand as purple flames started to form into miniature versions of her and Lucifer. “Luci…was my everything. He was my light. He was the one who taught me that I could strive for a better life. To dream one up and make it happen. He lost…everything for me.”

The flames then shifted to that of several angels attacked and sliced at Lucifer with their weapons. And as Lucifer stood back, Lilith began to fall. He dove in after her, shielding her body with his own as they fell through the air.

“So, when we figured out what to do, I saw it as our chance to have the happy life we dreamed of. I was his queen and he was my king…but I…I couldn’t make him smile like he used to. He didn’t want our kingdom. He didn’t want any of the Sinners or the Hellborn. He didn’t want the fresh start…he sat in his workshop all day and all night, trying to distract himself. He would even try to make himself look as angelic as possible so he could just… forget where he was.”

GM looked down, obviously feeling partially responsible for his son’s mental health plummeting even further than he did.

“Even when we gave birth to Charlie after so many attempts…his smile only grew a little. He became even more scared and secluded when she started to act just like him…instead of dreaming of what she would grow up to be, he dreaded what she would get herself into. Like he did.” Lilith said. “As a little girl, Charlie always wanted to be with her father…and I had to tell her that he was busy or he was asleep because I didn’t want to bother him. No matter what I did, I…I couldn’t bring that sweet smile back to me…he had freed me from my prison, only to get trapped in one himself.”

“Lilith…”

“I’m not done.” Lilith said, shutting her eyes. “You can’t possibly know how much it hurts to know you have ruined the one who saved you and loved you…and then, I had to raise Charlie practically all by myself! And I had to keep Hell from tearing itself apart because even if I empower them with my songs, it’s still populated by a bunch of f*cking lunatics that I had to keep in line or torture if need be…I was lucky Lucifer had made Razzle and Dazzle just to keep Charlie company while I wanted to tear my own hair out of frustration…”

She then stood from her chair, looking at Heaven’s ocean. “…and then…my former husband came with the grand idea of yearly genocide…and Lucifer approved. He hated our kingdom so much that he would let the same people who exiled us tear it down bit by bit…it was as if he had struck me with a holy blade…”

Tears started to stream down her face. “We screamed at each other…we’ve had fights before, but…this one was unlike all of the others…and his words only proved he was better off having never met me. I ruined him.”

GM slowly walked over, his heart clenching as he looked down at his daughter in law.

“…so, I left…if I had failed my Lucifer as a wife, I didn’t want to imagine what I could’ve turned Charlie into…” Lilith whispered as she hugged herself, trying to keep more tears from coming out.

GM could even see her rubbing her wedding ring almost desperately .

“They would’ve found me in Hell, so…I went to the one place no one would ever think to look.”

“Heaven.” GM said. “…Lilith, abandoning your family didn’t help them. If anything, it made them and Hell worse. ”

Lilith turned. “…Charlie started a hotel to redeem Sinners and it works. Lucifer reunited with her…and I wasn’t there for any of it. They are better off without me and you know it. You’re just trying to make me feel better…”

GM sighed. “…there’s a thing that humans and demons and even we in Heaven often do. They…well, lie. And it seems you have done the same.”

Lilith turned. “What?”

“You’ve lied to yourself.” GM said. “So…please try not to listen to the voices that tell you that your family doesn’t need you.”

Lilith scoffed. “Like you haven’t lied before?”

GM smiled suddenly. “You are not wrong, my First Woman…but no one’s perfect.” He said as he suddenly began tapping his foot. “~I won’t give emotional weight~”

“That’s a lie.” Lilith said.

“~I won’t show up so, so late!~”

“Lie.”

“~I won’t let out so much hate!~”

“Lie.”

“~I won’t do so much singing!~”

Lilith rolled her eyes and then sang herself, almost as if to mock the Heavenly Father. “~Lieee!~”

But GM, however, was still smiling wide. “~I won’t steer my children wrong!~”

“Lie!”

“~All my work I won’t prolong!~”

“Ha! Lie.”

“~I’ll stick around for years to come!~”

“Another lie!”

“~I could stop empowering the dumb!~”

Lilith then faced him. “~Let’s face the facts and come to terms, it’s time to realize! These goals are only merely hope we quickly leave behind! They’re lies, lies, lies, lies, lieeeesss!~”

The Queen of Hell then sighed. “What game are you playing here, Jehovah?”

“You’re smart. You’re figuring it out.” GM grinned. “~I could cook a meal or four!~”

“…true?”

“~Keep my kingdom from uproars!~”

“True?”

“~Let all my Angels soar!~”

“Too true…”

“~Tell my family that I love them more!~”

Lilith sighed. “Okay…”

“~There’s some scripture left to read!~”

“True.” Lilith hummed, slowly figuring out pieces of what GM was trying to tell her.

“~Do my best to do good deeds!~”

“Fair enough.”

“~Give the time that others need!~”

“True…”

“~Stand tall and take the lead!~”

Lilith then stepped forward. “~Don’t kid yourself, you know no one is this sublime~”

“~You may be right or you could be wrong! We’ll both find out in time if they’re lies, lies, lies, lies, lieeeesss! They could be lies, lies, lies, lies, lieeeessss! I won’t let them be lies, lies, lies, lies, lieeeesss!~”

He then grinned. “And neither should you.”

“Are you done with that song?” Lilith sighed.

GM chuckled. “I thought you liked singing.”

“I do- UGH! Just tell me what you’re trying to get across!”

“I’m not the perfect father or grandfather.” GM said. “So if someone with power such as mine can make so many mistakes, yet strive to make amends…so can you.”

“…my family will hate me if they find out where I’ve been…”

“Perhaps. But, that doesn’t mean they don’t deserve to know.” GM said. “And look at me. I never thought my son would ever wish to talk to me ever again…and yet here we are.”

Lilith looked to the side, her hair blowing in the wind. “…if what you’re saying is true and…and they really have been worse without me there…what in the unholy Hell could I do? What… should I do?”

“If you ask me? Go back to them.” GM said.

The Queen of Hell was left silent.

“…but I can’t force you to do anything. You have to want it.” GM said. “I have more paperwork and things to sort out here in Heaven… and Hell. I hope you’ll consider my words.”

And with that, the Father of Creation was gone in a golden flash, leaving Lilith to ponder what she had been told.

Chapter 18: Episode 18: Adam and Lute

Chapter Text

GM patiently waited in his office, sorting through another stack of paperwork. While his other self was in Hell, continuing to bond more and more with his granddaughter, his son, and all of their friends.

And while he could exist in two places at once as he was doing now, he knew that he would have to return to Heaven completely soon…there was just one more thing to settle.

“Come in.” GM said when he heard the bell ring, setting his papers down as he cracked his neck.

Michael, now less stressed, poked his head into the room, a tired smile on his face. “Hi, Dad…”

“Ah! My son!” GM grinned. “You’re not who I was expecting, but how are things? And hey! Those bags under your eyes are finally gone!!!”

“Things are good…Annabelle had to drag my dumb butt to bed, but I feel better now that I slept…although Molls was a little worried when I slept for a week straight, heh.” He chuckled sheepishly.

GM stood from his desk and went over. “After all this paperwork, I cannot blame you. But, what brings you here? I do have a scheduled appointment with a certain… someone.”

“Ah. I just got a report. Er…Adam's soul has been spotted regenerating a new body…in Hell.”

“Oh, I’m aware.” GM grinned, looking all too knowing.

Michael snorted. “Something tells me you have something planned.”

“I am also in Hell as we speak, my boy…so, yes. I have something planned.” GM said before the door opened again. “And here is the one I was expecting…hello, Lute.”

Lute swallowed, especially when Michael gave her a dirty look. “...hello, Heavenly Father…”

GM just had an eerily-calm smile before he looked at his son. “Michael, I thank you for coming…but your old man has to have a private conversation with the former Exorcist here.”

Michael grinned knowingly, sending Lute a smug look as he slowly left the room.

Lute felt her normal hand shaking. She took a deep breath before slowly sitting down.

GM then sat down across from her, straightening his tophat and bowtie. “…I think you’re aware of what is going to happen to you, Lute.”

Lute slowly breathed through her nose. She wouldn't start crying now. She couldn't. “...yes, sir…”

GM then put his hands together. “…for your crimes against Heaven and Hell itself, you will spend the rest of eternity in Hell as a Fallen Angel. And you are not allowed to redeem yourself in the Hazbin Hotel…besides…I doubt you’d want to lose to Vaggie again anyway. The one you mutilated for sparing a Hellborn child. You know, the deal between Lucifer and Adam was that you couldn’t kill any of the Hellborn…so in a way? You punished Vaggie for doing her job.”

Lute didn't say anything. “...I did. Because I was jealous.”

It wasn't an excuse. It was merely an explanation. She had hated Vaggie from the moment she was created, simply because for a while, Adam had favored her.

And not only that, but when they were still in training to be Exorcists for Adam, their teacher always favored Vaggie. She was just second best no matter how many demons she killed.

“I know.” GM said. “You embody the sins of Envy and Wrath almost ‘to a T’ as the kids say…but…you should be considering yourself lucky. Adam just regenerated in Hell, and I know your feelings for him. You can suffer for your crimes together at the very least.”

Lute's eyes widened and she choked. “...Adam's alive?”

GM nodded. “Despite holy energy having the capability to permanently kill a soul’s form…the soul itself still has to go somewhere. And Azrael, ever the comedian, thought it would be perfect if Adam ended up there. Because…what was it you said? Hell is forever?”

“...yes…”

GM then stood. “So, that’s where you’ll be forever…try to land on something soft.”

And then, with a snap of his fingers, a portal opened up right beneath Lute and her wings glowed a bright gold and suddenly felt like the heaviest of weights.

“I’ll meet you down there.” GM said as he disappeared in a golden flash.

Lute took a deep breath. She struggled to stand, looking around her home one final time.

“...thanks for everything…and I'm sorry.”

She then forced herself to the portal…and let herself fall.

Everything was a blur. The First Man couldn’t remember it all for a moment…but it started to come back.

Lucifer pummeling him with flaming fists, and then spared by Hell’s Princess…and then a burning pain in his chest after an attempt to make himself seem above the Sinners he lost to.

Adam groaned as he held his head. “…fuuuuck…what happened-“

But then, his eyes widened when he felt his head. He grabbed onto something attached to it: a horn .

Adam immediately stood up and looked at himself, seeing his once heavenly robes were now black and red , with the robes themselves being torn up and looking like something straight out of a heavy metal band.

“… oh, sh*t. ” Adam said as he looked behind him and saw a rather large demon tail. “…OH, SHI-“

And then, he cried out in pain as something landed right on top of him. “OW!!! WHAT THE f*ck?!? GET OFF ME!!!”

A familiar voice groaned. “f*ck you, these wings are heavy!”

Adam then used what strength he had to shove off whoever landed on him. “They feel pretty f*ckin’ light to me, bitch!!!”

The woman snarled and sat up. “I swear to God I'm going to-”

Her eyes widened. “...Adam?”

Adam’s now completely red eyes widened soon after and he rubbed them to make sure he wasn’t seeing things.

And right in front of him was a white-haired woman with large horns poking out of her head, still soaked with blood as if they had just grown in. She had a crimson-colored robotic arm and completely black wings…and an all too familiar uniform.

“…Lute?” Adam asked.

Lute's eyes widened…then filled with tears. “Adam!”

The First Man was then embraced by the former Exorcist, with Adam looking confused. “Whoa! Uhh, hey! sh*t, when did you get here? How’d you get horns? You’re still bleeding by the way.”

Lute sighed. “...I Fell.”

“Wait, what!?” Adam cried. “Who in God’s name-“

Then, as if on cue, GM towered over them. “Funny how you mention that.”

Adam yelped like a little girl and crawled away…and he gave a very terrified grin. “B-B-Big G!!!”

“Hello, Adam.” GM said with a grin. “How was your laughable death?”

“…not f-fun…”

GM chuckled. “Good. It wasn’t supposed to be.”

Adam then slowly sat up. “L-listen, God-“

“You will refer to me as ‘sir’ or not at all.” GM huffed, summoning another cup of wine and taking a sip. “Am I understood?”

Adam nodded rapidly. “Y-y-yeah! Totally, Big- I-I mean sir!”

GM then stepped closer. “…I’m disappointed in you, Adam. Truly, I am…and not only are you now going to suffer for yearly genocide, which I’m still baffled you thought was a good idea, you are now going to know exactly what you’ve put thousands of souls through! Possibly even millions!!! And Lute is just as guilty!!!”

“I-I-I mean…they were-!”

“SILENCE!!!!” GM boomed as lightning struck right behind him.

Lute yelped…then promptly covered Adam's mouth to shut him up.

And Adam was too terrified to even scream into Lute’s hand.

GM took a deep breath to calm himself and stop himself from obliterating his First Man a second time. “…from the beginning, you were prideful. I created you and Lilith to be equals! You treated her as your slave! And when I created Eve? You treated her the exact same way!!! Did it ever occur to you that no woman wants to stay with you because you’re a murderous and sexist piece of sh*t who only stayed in Heaven because I created you!?!?”

Adam slowly shook his head.

“No. Of course it didn’t. Because you’re too busy thinking about rock and roll up here.” GM said, tapping Adam’s head. “Or sex or drinking or killing! You have no compassion except for Lute!!! And that’s only because she does your bidding! It was my second greatest mistake ever allowing you to stay even one second in Heaven!!!”

“…w-w-what was the first?”

GM’s eyes glowed gold. “Banishing the one who actually treated both of your wives like people. And now? Your pride has grown to the size of a mountain, and you’ve fallen down that mountain…into here. The very place you despise. Have fun being one of Lucifer’s subjects…and if I see you two step an inch towards my granddaughter again, you will not live to see what I do to you…”

Lute nodded rapidly. “Y-y-y-yes, s-s-s-s-sir…”

“Good…I’d find a job if I were you.” GM said as he snapped his fingers to make a portal back to Heaven…but nothing happened.

His eyes widened and he kept snapping, to no avail.

Adam blinked. “…uhhh…y-you good?”

“That’s…strange.” GM said as he kept trying to summon a portal.

And as he kept trying, the three were suddenly surrounded in darkness…and on the ground, walls, and even the sky itself…and then glowing red eyes snapped open and stared at them.

Adam shrieked, trying to reach for the axe that was no longer there.

GM stepped back…and he froze when he heard a familiar laugh. “…oh no…”

“S-s-sir…what's happening?” Lute whispered, standing protectively in front of Adam.

GM then took a deep breath. “…she rescheduled…”

“Rescheduled wha-“

And then, in a bright red flash, the three of them disappeared.

They then reappeared a second later in an entirely new realm that one could confuse for Hell…but it was more like one thought Hell was like.

A barren wasteland with crimson stone and no life in sight…except for black spikes having impaled rotten corpses, specifically where their heart was.

Adam looked around in a panic, standing up. “Where the f*ck are we!?!?”

And then, another figure appeared in the same red flash. The oldest Overlord of Hell: Zestial.

“ What be the cause of this!? ” Zestial asked before he turned and saw his father…and all four of his eyes narrowed. “YOU…”

Adam stepped back. “Uhhh…do I know you?”

Lute swallowed. “Adam…look ahead…”

Adam looked ahead as he was told and saw someone else become teleported like they were…although, this one he recognized.

Because the angel had a striking resemblance to him.

Adam rubbed his eyes and squinted them. “…Abel???”

Zestial whipped around. “What?”

And sure enough, there was a young man, wearing golden robes, and looking very similar to Adam, with his hair and golden wings…but he had green eyes instead of Adam's signature gold, with a long scar across his face.

“Dad?” Abel uttered…before he gave Zestial a dirty look. “...Cain.”

“Abel.” Zestial huffed before turning to GM, who was staring at the only tree in the entire realm. “Heavenly Father, what is the meaning of this?”

“…she kept it…”

Adam blinked. “Uhhh…kept what?”

“I thought she would’ve burned it or mutated it…” GM muttered, stepping back to gaze at the tree.

Abel looked at the tree…and his breath hitched.

He knew this tree. He had grown up around it ever since he was born. His mother had been obsessed with it. He remembered her and his brother would come out here and water it all the time.

“…The Tree of Knowledge…” Zestial breathed as he walked over.

Although, now instead of a glorious and green tree that God forbid any mortal from getting close to…the bark was completely red and it lacked any leaves or plants. And the branches curved upwards in a way that almost formed a symbol.

“Wait, wait, wait… the f*ckin’ tree that Lucifer gave Eve that stupid apple from?!” Adam cried.

Then, laughter surrounded them…and right beside them appeared a pathway.

GM sighed. “She’s always dramatic…follow me if you want to live. We’re not in Hell anymore.”

Zestial scoffed as he followed. “Should’ve told them to stay then.”

“H-HANG ON, WAIT UP!!!” Adam cried as he grabbed Lute’s hand and dragged her with, whether it be with intentions to keep her around or to use her as a human shield was unknown.

Abel sighed heavily, shaking his head as he followed. “...Okay, Mother…let's play.”

The group walked down the path before reaching a small… church . But unlike the ones on Earth, it was definitely not a sanctuary to God.

Instead of crosses, there was the same symbol that The Tree of Knowledge was. Instead of stained glass windows, there were blinking eyes, and the garden in front of it wasn’t of plants…but of completely red souls…

Zestial hummed. “Souls…without a form…?”

“Because they’re corrupted.” GM said as he opened the doors to the church.

Adam gulped. “Uhhh, Big G… please tell me what’s going-“

And then, inside the church’s sanctuary…was a woman. A gray-skinned woman with long flowing black hair, a large red coat and hat, and with pieces of her skin cut off to reveal darkness underneath.

“…Eve…” GM said.

“ The Root of Evil…” Zestial sneered.

Eve turned around with a large grin, her red eyes glowing bright.

“…hello, family.”

Chapter 19: Episode 19: The Root of All Evil

Chapter Text

Eve couldn’t help but cackle to herself as she walked over. “Man, look at all of you! When’s the last time we were all under one roof?”

“Why reschedule our meeting, Roo?” GM asked, his four eyes narrowed.

Zestial turned. “…meeting? With her?”

GM sighed. “Your mother gets bored…so these meetings are a way to keep her entertained so she won’t-“

“Eviscerate a bunch of people.” Roo commented. “Or consume their souls. Or torture them until their vocal cords stop working. Or corrupt them into zombified horrors. Or f*ck them to death! Now, that’s a popular way to die! Some people are f*cked up, y’know…and not just cause of me! HA!”

GM actually looked…disturbed at that. “…what she said.”

“…you’re telling me that’s Eve!?!?” Adam shrieked, finally processing that he was standing across from his second ex-wife.

Roo hummed. “Sup, chubby.”

Adam’s eye twitched. “f*ck you! I’m not-!“

Roo then appeared right beside her ex-husband, grinning wide with her sharp teeth and making him scream like a little girl.

Lute put herself in front of Adam, snarling. “Why are we here, Eve?”

“Ohhh, you must be the new girl he’s got! You’re cute~” Roo flirted, sticking out her tongue…which had various tendrils, spikes, and even eyes on it.

Lute cringed. “What the f*ck?!”

“What? Not into girls?” Roo chuckled.

A clone of Roo then appeared before Adam and suddenly punched him in the gut. “But you’re into this?”

Adam fell to his knees, clutching his stomach in pain.

Zestial tried not to smirk in amusem*nt.

GM sighed. “Roo, can you tell me why you rescheduled? I’m very busy.”

“Oh, yeah! Busy, busy, busy! The Big G’s always busy!” Roo said as her clone disappeared. “Real busy talking to people about their problems. Where’s the old you, man? Y’know…genocides. Floods. Plagues-“

“The genocides were you.” GM said, his eyes narrowed.

Roo blinked before she laughed hysterically. “YOU’RE RIGHT, IT WAS!!!”

The Root of Evil kept laughing more and more, even falling onto the floor and kicking her legs out.

Zestial then sighed. “Mother, you’re acting like a child.”

Roo then looked at her eldest son, her laughing being cut off almost immediately. “Oh, right! I brought you here, Cain! And the other one…uhhh…sh*t, what was your name again?”

Abel sighed, already tired. “Abel.”

“…pfft, who named you that?” Roo grinned. “How about a new one? Let’s call you… Mistake.”

GM got in front of Abel. “Roo. Enough. Explain yourself.”

Roo teleported onto one of the many benches, but she was sitting upside down. “Alright, alright! Way to ruin my fun. I wanted to see ya’ll again!”

“…to mess with us?” Adam asked, still holding his stomach.

“Mmmm, yeah!” Roo said with a rapid nod. “And also, the big man upstairs over there is in Hell of all places! I mean, how could I not notice that? Especially since you’re talking to my butler a lot.”

“Alastor.” GM confirmed.

Zestial’s eyes widened and he turned to his mother. “You’re in possession of Alastor’s soul?”

“No sh*t, Cain.” Roo grinned as she got up. “How do you think he got all that power? But it wasn’t enough. He still lost to Fatty over there.”

“Not to mention that Adam got stabbed by a petite cyclops.” Abel scoffed.

Adam’s eyes narrowed. “Is everyone just gonna f*cking insult me today!?!”

“Yes.” Zestial hissed. “Frankly, I’m more curious as to how you’re even still around, Adam…”

Roo made an ‘ooh’ sound as she slithered right next to her son. “Using the first names! Daaaaamn…that’s my boy! The boy I murdered.”

Zestial turned to his mother. “You didn’t even tell me why on that day, Mother. If anything, you benefited from my life spreading evil into the world.”

“You? Spreading evil instead of me?” Roo asked as she hummed. “Yeah, no. Sorry, no. Not happening. I intend to kill the competition…and I did! I killed you with a rock like you did Mistake over there!”

“Considering that I'm related to three wastes of Creation's precious materials, I consider it a mercy kill.” Abel shrugged.

Roo then walked over to her son, clearly not very fond of his casual reaction. She stared at him for an uncomfortable amount of time…before her face literally split apart into an indescribable amount of horror.

She turned back to normal once her son stepped back. “Okie dokie, we’re good now!”

“EVE, THE f*ck!?” Adam cried. “I wouldn’t even do that!”

“Says the genocidal maniac to the gal who made genocide.” Roo said, pointing at herself. “You stole my goddamn thing, Adam! You stole my thing! Ima hit you for that again!”

And sure enough, two more clones of her appeared behind Adam and began punching and kicking him until he was curled up on the floor.

“Oh, never gets old.” Roo smirked. “He’s like a punching bag! Like, c’mon! Could you have a more punchable face?”

Lute growled. “YOU c*nt!!!”

She raced towards Roo…but then Abel quite literally picked her up with one hand, due to actually having a lean build unlike the others.

“I can see why he f*cks you.” Abel murmured. “You’re a buffoon with one less brain cell than him.”

“Thou are also a fool to believe you’d stand a chance against Mother…as much as it pains me to say that…” Zestial grimaced.

Roo waved. “Hate ya too, kiddo! Want me to recap on why I’m invincible?”

GM’s eyes widened. “WAIT, NOT AGAIN-!”

And sure enough, in the background, various corrupted souls smashed through the windows of Roo’s church with instruments in hand…and began playing music.

“Ah, I love a good story…so, let’s start at the beginning.” Roo smirked.

And with the sound of a trumpet, reality was slowly warped into that of some kind of shadow puppet show, showing Roo…or rather what she used to be: Eve.

“~Dear ‘ol Eve bought knowledge! For the small price of a little sin!~” The Root of Evil sang. “~ also lost eternal life, but what’s fruit without the pits?~”

Abel sighed. “You were given the Fruit of Knowledge.”

Roo appeared and kicked Abel away with a malicious grin, ironically with the music emphasizing the kick perfectly. “~I’m evil’s roots, and it’s high time that I dropped in! And since you haven’t puked yet, you’ll know they’re wrong when they call you sick!~”

She then appeared right beside GM, who was staring at her with a clear combo of annoyance and actual unease. “~It’s unicorn horns and dragon tails, so much dull creativity! If you want the spectrum A-Z, then you need a little help from me!~”

A tendril then swatted GM right onto a stage, with the Heavenly Father nearly losing his hat…before he almost vomited at what Roo showed him next.

“~From hardcore p*rn to souls impaled, I give these things generously!!!~” Roo sang. “~If you really wanna challenge your view of sh*t, then you need to stop limiting me!!!~”

She then appeared beside her former family and Lute, with clones of her disguised as ‘regular’ people.

“~What in the hell have I been drinking?~”

“~It’s fine! It isn’t you these thoughts you’re thinking!~”

GM groaned. “You have to stop your mom from singing!!!”

“I love how hard you try, it’s so cute! Let’s resume!” Another clone of Roo smirked as they kicked GM right in the face, completely unphased by who she was messing with. “~People don’t like me much, I’m an artist! And it’s only just because I’m honest! Good and bad is all made up NONSENSE!!!~”

Adam finally got up again. “Woman, I’m gonna whoop your ass!”

Roo smirked as she threw the First Man into a chokehold. “~Do ya promise? Hey, kids! Speaking of honesty, recently a snake offered me a morsel from the Tree of Knowledge!~”

The shadow puppets from earlier then changed from that of just Eve, to Eve…and a familiar serpent with a large tophat.

“~He said ‘You’re wanting to be more honessst and be direct when dealing with your isssuesss? No longer will you deceive yourssself about the uglinesss within you’!~ ’”

The shadow puppet of Eve then transformed into a horrifying abomination for about half of a second before showing herself as Roo again. “~Neat! You wanna face facts? I’ve got one! My late night thoughts get pretty sick, dude. If I shared those musings with your friends, I’m pretty sure they’d just puke~”

She then appeared beside Zestial, gripping onto his shoulders and forcing her claws into them. “~Even though everybody sins!~”

Another clone of Roo appeared beside Lute and cut her own head off, tossing it into the former Exorcist’s hands, yet the head still sang. “~Everybody dies! Why deny yourself knowledge, sayyy knowledge of yourself!?~”

Lute's eyes widened and she dropped the head in disgust. “You’re sick!”

The head shot out black tendrils and forcefully reattached itself to its body, with sounds of bones cracking and snapping as it did. Roo smirked wide as she began to grow in size, her own body slowly beginning to turn completely black.

“~You don’t need to be ashamed of dear old Roo, you need not fear decency!~”

Another Roo then grabbed Abel and forced him to look at a projection of his burning farm, with all of his animals still inside.

“~Ya see this barn on fire? I see it too! ‘Cause you’ve got a fiend in meee!!!~”

Abel's eyes widened in horror, and his knees buckled. "NO, NO, NO!!!"

Then large red puppet strings grabbed everyone, except GM and forced them to spin around and dance in a clearly forced and almost violent way.

“~So clap your feet and stomp your hands! Just dance off your bootycheeks!~” Roo cackled. “~’Cause you can bet your bottom I’ll still be around when I make your loved ones deceased! Imagine with me!~”

She then began showing each of them separate objections of all the awful things that she could do.

“~Kicking the air out of a dolphin! Your dear wife trapped inside a coffin! Your kids choking on a lossenge! Your pet dog stuffed into a sausage! ~ ”

Roo then finally came face to face with GM, grinning wide as he backed up more and more.

“~These sorts of things are only thoughts in the mind of a gal whose soul is truly rotten! So let all those dreams of Heaven be forgotten! ‘Cause my plans aren’t in the gutter, pal! They’re for Hell! Hell!!! HELL!!! THE KIND OF PLANS YOU’D ONLY FIND IN HELL!!!~”

And finally, she dropped all of them and was now the only one on stage, where she took a bow.

Roo then cackled as she tipped her hat. “Thank you, thank you! I’ll be here all night! Gotta say, didn’t think I could just straight up hit God in the face. Figured I’d be zapped with lightning, but ohhh, I just had to do it!”

GM stood, his eyes glowing gold. “Listen here, you destructive demon-“

“Oooh, thanks for the fancy words, Big G! I love being given two D’s at once.” Roo smirked.

GM covered his mouth and then finally threw up, although his puke looked more like golden stardust.

Abel quietly stood, still unable to process the image of his barn burning.

“...we’re done here, Eve.” He whispered, his voice breaking.

Roo chuckled as she held up her hands. “Yeah, you’re right! I’ve had my fun! Say hi to that sharp-shoed girlfriend of yours for me, Cain…you might not get another chance.”

And with a snap of her fingers, Adam, Lute, Zestial, and Abel were all returned to wherever she plucked them from.

GM then stood up…and then blasted Roo with a small beam of light from his finger . “…don’t do that again…”

Roo hissed as the holy light had caused a giant hole in her stomach that was slowly regenerating.

“…even after all that, I still haven’t gotten ya to try your real power!” Roo cackled. “Gotta say, you’re a tough nut to crack. Tell me, what’s stopping you?”

GM walked over. “You may be able to disturb me, but our arrangement is that I come here to entertain you once every year and you don’t wreak havoc on Earth. Your influence has done enough damage to humanity…so much so that I would actually have to try to kill you…and damage to the universe could be irreversible. I’d rather just keep you entertained than take that risk.”

Roo giggled. “I may have influenced them…but they still made that choice, y’know.”

“I know…we’re done here. I’ll see you next year.” GM said as he snapped his fingers and finally made another portal back to Heaven, since one of him was still at the hotel.

Roo smirked. “You know I may never be able to reach your level…but I’m getting there. I briefly stopped your little portals after all…”

“…then, if you ever break our deal, I’ll be ready for you.” GM said before he walked through the portal.

Roo then laid back as the hole in her stomach regenerated, ready to sleep until the next meeting. “You better be…”

Chapter 20: Episode 20: Welcome to Heaven...again

Chapter Text

After that…encounter, GM’s other self in Hell now knew that he couldn’t keep Roo entertained for much longer.

She would be satisfied for…maybe a few more years. A decade if he was lucky. Eventually, she would get bored. She would struggle to find new ways to disturb him.

…but for now, that encounter was out of the way. He had to focus on the good things that were happening to re-center himself.

Sera was now following Emily, Adam and Lute would hopefully learn their lesson in Hell, Roo was entertained for the year, he had started to rekindle his relationship with Lucifer, and he was getting closer and closer with his granddaughter.

“Grandpa?” Charlie asked, as if right on cue.

GM’s eyes widened and he turned. “Oh! Hello, Charlie! What’s up?”

“You just seemed to be staring out into space.” Charlie said. “Is everything okay?”

GM chuckled. “It is. I was just pondering something…in fact! I may have a new activity for you all to try!”

Charlie’s eyes sparkled. “Really?! Tell me!”

“How about to further motivate your patrons to get to Heaven, I take you all on a three day trip to it?!” GM smiled. “And that way, you can meet the rest of your family! Your aunts and uncles have been dying to meet you!”

Charlie’s eyes sparkled. “Really!?!?”

“Yes really!” GM said. “And with my…err…business discussions with Alastor and The Vees, some new patrons will hopefully be coming soon thanks to some helpful advertising.”

Charlie’s eyes then widened. “Wait, then shouldn’t I be here in case someone arrives?”

“I’ll be keeping an eye on the hotel if that were the case and I can simply teleport us back with down with a snap of my fingers.” GM smiled. “You won’t need to worry about the hotel.”

Charlie nodded, her smile quickly returning. “Okay! Okay, going to Heaven again!!! I’ll tell everyone- wait! Can Dad come?”

GM hummed. “Why not? But if he doesn’t want to, he can stay here and watch over the hotel…however, I would like him to. I know he hasn’t forgiven me just yet, if he ever will, but his siblings miss him.”

“…and what about Alastor?”

“He’ll be coming too, but I will personally keep an eye on him.” GM said. “Alastor may have good in him, but I don’t trust him to welcome any future patrons…nor do I trust him to be in Heaven without my supervision.”

“True.” Charlie said before hugging her grandfather. “Thank you, Grandpa!!! I’ll go tell everyone!!!”

GM watched her run off and he chuckled, walking after her. “If contagious happiness were a superpower, she would have it.”

Eventually, Charlie sped down to the lobby, where everyone happened to be. Vaggie was holding up Niffy, Husk was talking with Angel and Cherri, and Lucifer and Alastor were having a staring contest.

“Everyone!!!” Charlie cried.

Alastor and Lucifer both blinked, with Lucifer grinned wide. “HA!!! YOU BLINKED!!!”

“You did as well!” Alastor sneered.

Lucifer scoffed. “Liar!”

Vaggie set down Nifty. “What’s up, mi amor?”

“Grandpa just announced that we’re all going on a quick trip…to Heaven!!!” Charlie grinned.

Angel’s eyes widened. “Wait, what?!”

Lucifer and Vaggie’s eyes widened and they slowly shrunk a bit.

“But we haven’t been redeemed yet…have we???” Cherri asked, scratching her head. “sh*t, how can you tell?”

GM then walked over. “It’s not a permanent thing, my friends. Just a quick trip! I’m hoping it will further motivate you all. Besides…I think you all need some reunions.”

Husk’s eyes widened soon after and he looked at the card of Minnie that the Father of Creation gave him.

“…I could see Ma and Molly again?” Angel whispered.

Charlie nodded. “Uh-huh!!!”

“And Pen!?” Cherri cried. “f*ckin’ booyah! I need to pay him back…and scold the ever loving hell out of him for dying-“

“I get to stab more pretties!?!” Nifty squealed.

GM blinked. “Absolutely not. In fact, there will be some ground rules. In Heaven, you shall not start any fights, verbal or physical, with anyone or I will be forced to get involved. You will not kill anyone or steal from anyone…not that money is a thing in Heaven anyway. No weapons are allowed…and Alastor will be remaining at my side at all times.”

Alastor’s eyes went black and he gritted his teeth. “…fantastic…”

Lucifer slowly scooted over, right in front of Alastor’s ear. He then inhaled and let out a giant: “H A !”

“But…what about the hotel?” Vaggie asked.

“I have that handled, Vaggie…although, if you want to stay, I will not force you to come. Same goes for you, son.”

Vaggie rubbed the back of her neck. “…I mean…I guess it would be kinda nice to go back without any emotional baggage…”

Lucifer sighed. “Yeah, I’d have to agree…as long as I get to punch Michael in his stupid face.”

GM’s eyes narrowed. “No punching your brother…also, you’re twins. He has your face.”

Charlie’s eyes widened and she turned to her father. “Dad, you didn’t say you had a twin!”

“He came at me and your mother with a flaming sword, sweetie.” Lucifer said. “I think you can guess why I never brought him or your other aunts and uncles up.”

GM sighed. “Which is another reason I’m starting this trip. It’s time we finally squash our family’s feud. It’s been going on for far too long and Charlie deserves to meet the rest of her family.”

“…yeah, true.” Lucifer said. “But Vaggie and I are staying with Charlie during the whole thing! Besides, I gotta bond with my future daughter-in-law.”

Vaggie turned, her face immediately going red.

Charlie’s face also went red. “DAD!!!”

“No, he has a point.” GM shrugged.

“GRANDPA!!!”

Angel snorted. “Can I be the best man?”

“Wouldn’t it be Maid of Honor?” Husk asked.

Angel shrugged. “I don’t know, I’ve never been to a wedding.”

GM chuckled as his granddaughter and her girlfriend went through some ‘gay panic’ as the kids called it. “Well, everyone! Pack your bags!”

As everyone stood, GM snapped his fingers and their bags, already packed, appeared right in front of them.

“I may encourage hard work, but I’m just too excited.” GM chuckled before snapping his fingers again and summoning a portal to Heaven.

The employees and patrons of the Hazbin Hotel looked at each other before all slowly walking through the portal, with Lucifer and GM being the last ones.

“…you’re sure you’re up for this?” GM asked.

Lucifer sighed. “Yeah…best to get it done, right?”

“That’s my boy.” GM said, gently patting his son’s shoulder before they walked through the portal and it closed.

And when they arrived, there they were, at the gates of Heaven.

GM lifted his hand and opened the gates as he walked through. “Everyone… welcome to Heaven-!”

“Ummm, sir, could you not sing the song?” Vaggie asked. “W-with all due respect, Saint Peter did already.”

“Oh.” GM blinked.

Charlie nodded. “It was catchy! A lot of moaning though…”

“I didn’t write that into the lyrics.”

Chapter 21: Episode 21: Sir Pentious

Chapter Text

The beautiful golden city of Heaven had everyone in awe, except Vaggie and Lucifer, who remembered it all too well. Even Charlie was still in awe by its existence.

GM smiled. “Take in every sight you can, my friends! You are our guests.”

“Hey, uhh, Dad? You sure no one’s gonna try and come at me with a bunch of spears?” Lucifer asked suddenly, trying to hide his face with his hat.

“I can promise you that, son. I let Heaven’s various authorities know beforehand.” GM nodded, acting as the tour guide. “Oh! I think I know the perfect stop to go to first!”

“Is this whole thing made out of f*ckin’ gold?” Angel breathed.

“No, it’s various other colors and materials.” GM said. “But that aside, follow me!”

Charlie then looked at her girlfriend and father. “You two doing okay?”

Vaggie smiled. “We’re doing fine, hun. Right, your highness?”

“Surprisingly yeah.” Lucifer said.

Charlie smiled and quickly caught up with her grandfather.

Vaggie then looked at Lucifer. “How are you actually doing?”

“I’m terrified.” Lucifer squeaked, his voice cracking.

“Same.” Vaggie squeaked back.

After a quick walk through the beautiful city, they arrived at a small workshop of sorts. The workshop itself looked to be a combination of modern day…and the Victorian Era?

“What are we here for?” Husk asked, still holding Nifty from trying to run and stab someone.

GM grinned. “You’ll see.”

Eventually, they walked through the door and inside the workshop…was a familiar Seraphim and serpent.

“You’re sure Heaven’s military needs all this?” Emily asked, looking at a giant cannon.

Pentious laughed, lifting his goggles. “But of courssse they will! You never know when an actual uprisssing may happen!”

“That’s the same attitude that had Sera think genocide was a good idea.” Emily said.

Pentious blinked. “…oh. Right.”

“…Pentious?” Charlie gasped, covering her mouth.

Pentious’ eyes widened and he whipped around, dropping his welder. “…my friendsss?”

Angel stepped forward. “Holy sh*t…”

Husk rubbed his eyes a bit before he grinned. “Well, I’ll be damned.”

“Seems he really is unkillable.” Alastor hummed.

Nifty blinked. “The phony bad boy’s now a good boy?”

“…PENTIOUS!!!” Charlie sobbed as she dashed over and hugged the heavenly snake.

And sure enough, Vaggie, Angel, Nifty, and even Husk joined in.

Pentious laughed with tears in his eyes as he hugged all of them back. “MY FRIENDSSS!!!”

Emily watched the reunion with sparkly eyes, even making the sound of a squeaky toy once again.

“Holy crap, dude!!! Look at you!!!” Angel laughed, smacking Pentious on the back. “Who knew you’d look good in white?”

“I-I know!!!” Pentious laughed. “I’m ssso happy to see you all again!!! How did you get here? Are you all already redeemed?!”

“Not yet. They’re guests.” GM said as he stepped forward. “I wanted to show them all around.”

Charlie was still hugging Pentious. “I’m so, so, so sorry that I let Adam blast you!!!”

Pentious’ eyes widened. “What? No, no, no! Charlie, that wasss not your fault! If anything, that wasss me! I wanted to look awesssome and I assssumed my death ray would’ve done the trick.”

Husk sighed. “I hate to admit it, but…your death was kinda funny.”

Vaggie turned. “Husk-!”

“No, he’sss right. I got to rewatch it, it wasss sort of hilariousss.” Pentious laughed. “And now the Heavenly Father has allowed me to build weaponsss for Heaven’s military!!!”

GM then looked at Cherri. “I told you we weren’t all relaxation- Ummm…Cherri?”

Cherri had still not moved from her spot, staring at Pentious in awe.

Pentious gasped as his face flushed, and he slithered over. “Misss Cherri!!! You’re here!!! I’m ssso glad to see that you are- MMPH!?! ”

Cherri then tackled Pentious to the floor, having kissed him.

“Oh, jeez.” Lucifer and GM said in unison as they covered Charlie and Emily’s eyes with their hats.

Charlie, however, was squealing like a little girl as she peeked over to watch the romantic reunion take place.

Emily, as if she was Charlie’s twin, was doing the same.

Angel whistled. “Go get him, Cher!!!”

Alastor rolled his eyes. “Disgusting…”

Eventually, Cherri parted the kiss and looked into Pentious’ eyes.

He had a dopey grin across his face and his pupils even had hearts in them. “T-that wasss-“

And then, Cherri slapped him.

“…ow.” Pentious blinked.

“Don’t you ever dare f*ckin’ die on me again!!!” Cherri said as she was now the one hugging him.

Pentious nodded as he hugged back. “O-of courssse not, Miss-“

“Casey.” Cherri said. “That’s, uhh, that’s my real name. Just keep callin’ me Cherri, but…figured you should know.”

Pentious’ eyes widened. “Oh! Umm…then you may call me Edward.”

“Wait, wait…your name’s Casey?” Angel asked.

Cherri turned. “Yeah?”

“How the f*ck did I not know that? I’ve known you for years!” Angel cried.

Cherri shrugged. “Ya never asked.”

Charlie then looked at Emily. “Emily!!! You look different!!! I love the new halo and dress!!!”

Emily giggled and twirled around. “Thank you!!! It came with my new job as Head Seraphim.”

Vaggie blinked. “Wait, what? You’re the Head Seraphim now?”

“Yeah! Grandpa had Sera demoted and me promoted!” Emily smiled.

GM grinned. “You didn’t think I was going to let Sera keep her job, did you?”

“…I mean, I guess not.” Vaggie said. “Wait. Did she just call you Grandpa? Are you-?”

“Oh, no, no!” GM chuckled. “She isn’t my actual grandchild…but she’s just so adorable! She and Charlie are practically twins! I mean, look at them!”

“Awwww, Grandpa!” Charlie and Emily said in unison before looking at each other. “Jinx! Oh, sorry. You can have the soda!”

Lucifer walked over. “Okay, yeah. It’s like looking into a mirror.”

Emily gasped and walked over. “And you're Lucifer Morningstar!!! The first Fallen Angel!!!”

Lucifer chuckled sheepishly. “Y-yup, that’s-“

“It’s super nice to meet you!!!” Emily said, shaking his hand rapidly. “Your daughter’s an inspiration! You must be so proud!”

Vaggie stood closer to her girlfriend, clearly a tiny bit jealous that she wasn’t the one giving all the Charlie praise for once.

Lucifer stared at Emily for a while before he set a hand on her shoulder. “Emily, how would you like to be adopted?”

Emily blinked…and then actually considered the idea for a moment.

Alastor looked at Lucifer. “You’re just going to adopt the first Angel you see-?”

“Okay! Never really had any parents besides Sera and…well, we know how that went!” Emily smiled.

Angel blinked. “Is…is it really that simple-“

“I HAVE A SISTER!!!” Charlie squealed, hugging Emily.

Pentious hummed. “It seemsss it is that sssimple!”

Chapter 22: Episode 22: ...Jesus?

Chapter Text

“Alright, everyone! The real trip now begins!” GM smiled as he snapped his fingers and suddenly, multiple portals appeared.

Charlie blinked. “Eh? Grandpa? What are these all for?”

“These portals will take each of you to your specific part of Heaven to the places you want to go…to the people you want to see.” GM smiled.

Angel’s eyes widened and he stared at his portal with this sense of…nervousness.

Husk was staring at his the same way, taking a deep breath.

Nifty giggled maniacally. “Heaven’s full of so many pretties!!!”

“Nifty? You shall be going with me and Alastor.” GM said.

Alastor sighed. “At least I have someone I can stand.”

“I should probably be getting back to my Seraphim duties anyway!” Emily giggled. “Bye, New-Dad! Bye, New-Sister!!!”

“Bye, New-Sister!!!” Charlie squealed as she watched Emily fly off. “So, where will me, Dad, and Vaggie be? You said you wanted us to meet the rest of the family?”

“One of my sons is waiting for you. He’ll be your guide.” GM smiled before he ruffled Charlie’s head. “And have fun in Heaven, my child. All of you have fun! But please don’t kill or blow anything up.”

Cherri snorted. “Buzzkill.”

Pentious hummed as he and Cherri slithered through a portal. “There isss something I think that could sssimulate your love of chaosss, my dear!”

“…go on.” Cherri said before the portal closed behind them.

Angel looked at Husk. “…hope you find your kid, Henrik.”

“Feels weird to hear you call me that.” Husk laughed. “Good luck finding your family.”

Angel nodded with a smile as they walked through their portals.

And then, GM, Nifty, and Alastor walked through theirs and the last three were left inside the workshop with their portal.

“Alright!!! Time for a big family reunion!!!” Charlie smiled.

Lucifer gave a meek thumbs up. “…yayyyy…”

Vaggie rubbed the back of her neck. “Let’s go then, huh?”

Charlie nodded and walked through with her father and her girlfriend…and they appeared in front of a large house. It was almost a mansion.

“Whoa…wait, I’ve never seen this place before.” Vaggie said. “Your highness?”

Lucifer chuckled. “Ohhh, this brings back some memories.”

“Dad?” Charlie asked.

“Charlie? Vaggie? This is Dad’s house. Also known as the Archangel Estate. My childhood home.”

Vaggie turned. “Wait…I thought you were a Seraphim too?”

“Ehhhh, I was an Archangel and then got demoted to a Seraphim…or promoted. I dunno! I don’t remember or care about the Heavenly Hierarchy.” Lucifer shrugged as they began walking towards the mansion.

Charlie blinked and then knocked on the door awkwardly, but patted her sides when no one answered.

“Is…anyone home?” Vaggie asked. “Maybe check for cars or-“

“Vaggie, we don’t have cars.” Lucifer said before showing his wings. “We got these.”

Vaggie hummed and showed her own wings. “Right…man, I’ve been in Hell too long.”

Charlie was then about to knock again before the door suddenly opened, revealing a man on the other side.

The man looked… familiar. Human almost . He had peach skin, a beard, and dark brown hair. He was wearing a rather pristine and clean white suit with a large golden sash over it, and six golden wings had sprouted from his back to show he was indeed an Angel like they were. Or at least, he was now. His halo, strangely enough, was worn more like a headband or crown instead of floating above him.

And finally, he wore black gloves which blended in rather well with his suit.

The man smiled kindly. “Ah! It’s good to see the company has finally arrived.”

Lucifer’s eyes widened. “Jesus?”

“Big brother. It’s a pleasure to see you remember me.” Jesus said with a bow.

Vaggie rubbed her eye. “Wait, what?”

Charlie gasped, covering her mouth.

“Well, damn! Look at you, man!” Lucifer laughed. “I almost didn’t recognize you with your cut hair!!! Why’d you cut it?”

“It, err, grew so long that the others forced me to cut it.” Jesus said with a light chuckle. “Ah, that was quite the day.”

“Oh, you should’ve seen Lilith!” Lucifer laughed. “She would step on it and then just fall right back! It was hilarious. I’d encourage her to cut it…and she only would by a little . Can’t blame her, her hair was gorgeous.”

Jesus hummed. “I suppose it was. And you must be our darling niece, Charlotte Morningstar. It’s a blessing to finally meet you.”

Charlie slowly turned to Vaggie. “I’m the niece of Jesus, Vaggie!”

“Yup, I can see that, hun-“

“You’re my uncle!!!” Charlie squealed before hugging him suddenly. “It’s so good to meet you, Uncle Jesus!!! Ooh, ooh!! Uncle J?”

Jesus chuckled, hugging back. “Call me whatever you wish, Charlie. And you must be Vaggie, her girlfriend and the third Fallen Angel in all of history.”

Vaggie rubbed the back of her neck. “Uhhh, yep. That would be me…wait, third? Who was the second?”

“It’s a long story.” Jesus said. “But it happened long before I was born and the fall…wasn’t nearly as important as Lucifer’s. Not that your fall wasn’t at all important.”

Vaggie grinned a bit. “Maybe I should’ve started a rebellion too.”

“Annnnd you’ve earned my blessing.” Lucifer grinned. “Still, baby bro, when did you become an Archangel?”

“Oh. I’m not. I simply live here ever since the others moved out. Father is often too busy to be here.” Jesus chuckled before he opened the door. “Please. Come in.”

They all walked inside, with Charlie immediately in awe about how almost everything was in white and gold. It was fantastic especially since she had mostly grown up with everything being some shade of red.

“Father has assigned for me to be your guide, and I’m delighted to be.” Jesus smiled. “Please, explore as much as you wish.”

Charlie then ran around, even running up and down the stairs. “THIS PLACE IS HUGE!!!”

Vaggie smiled and flew after her girlfriend. “Hun, wait up!”

“…soooo…” Lucifer said. “How are the others? Do they, uhh, know I’m coming?”

“They know…can’t say all of them are excited. Namely Raphael. You know how he is.” Jesus said.

Lucifer sighed. “Still a massive douche?”

“Brother.”

“What? It’s true! Still doesn’t beat Michael though.” Lucifer said. “Friggin’ tattletale…”

Jesus’ eyes softened and he sighed. “Lucifer, you know he was just looking out for Heaven and Eden’s safety…”

“…how about we just talk about this whenever we actually see him?” Lucifer said. “Please tell me he’s last.”

“If you wish, he will be.” Jesus said. “How about we move on though? What’s ‘been up with you’?”

Lucifer turned. “…man, you and Dad are old geezers.”

“Oh, I know slang words. I’ve been taking up the Earthly pastime and sometimes job known as ‘gaming’. It’s a delightful hobby.” Jesus said.

“Hey, those televisions rot your brain.” Lucifer said.

Jesus grinned. “And you said I was the old geezer, big brother?”

“Still.” Lucifer said. “By the way, why are you wearing those gloves?”

Jesus’ eyes narrowed a bit and he slipped off the gloves…to reveal a massive hole in his palm.

“…riiiight…awkward…” Lucifer said, tugging at his shirt collar.

Jesus chuckled and slipped them back on. “You are not the first to have asked, nor will you be the last. And you are family, I do not mind. But enough about me, how is Hell doing?”

“…it’s, uhh, it’s Hell.” Lucifer said. “Still sucks. But learned not all Sinners are terrible! Thinking about letting some of them travel to other Rings so Pride’s not so crowded.”

“They are not allowed in the other Rings? Why not?”

“Ehhh, the other Sins were worried about them hurting the Hellborn. And they can die-die. When Sinners die, they regenerate. It’s painful as heck, but still. Hellborn don’t.” Lucifer said. “But honestly, the Hellborn just tend to kill each other anyway. Won’t make too much of a difference.”

“…how is Satan anyhow?” Jesus asked.

Lucifer turned. “Why?”

“Let’s just say he showed up for my death.” Jesus said. “It was one of the few times he actually showed up to Earth. I think those few times are why humans often get you two mixed up.”

Lucifer sighed. “Yeah, that Bible thing doesn’t help either. It got so much wrong…”

“It was surprisingly accurate in some spots, however.” Jesus hummed.

Then, Charlie ran back down. “Dad, the beds are like clouds!!! The chairs too!!! This entire place is really nice!!!”

“We also saw a big screen TV and a bunch of gaming consoles.” Vaggie hummed.

“Those would be mine.” Jesus said before he snapped his fingers. “Now, let’s go meet the rest of our family, hmm?”

And sure enough, a portal opened up.

Charlie gasped. “You can do the portals too?!”

“Of course! So can your father…how much has he taught you of your magic?”

Charlie giggled sheepishly. “I, uhh, can make fireworks and fire…I don’t know much else. But I’m great with magic shows!”

“Yes, babe. Yes, you are.” Vaggie said as they all walked through the portal.

Chapter 23: Episode 23: Azrael

Chapter Text

“So! Uncle J! Who are we heading to next?” Charlie asked.

The only human son of GM hummed as they walked through the portal. “You’ll see in just a moment, Charlie.”

Lucifer took a deep breath. “Man…it really has been too long since I’ve seen the others…how much has changed, Jesus?”

J was silent for a moment, not at all helping Lucifer’s unease. “…let’s just say it’s 50/50 on terms of change. Some haven’t, some have. For one, Gabriel has a boyfriend now.”

Lucifer whipped his head towards his brother. “You’re serious? Super shy Gabriel found someone?”

“Dad, anyone can find love!” Charlie cried. “I mean, you met Mom and I met Vaggie!”

Vaggie blushed, gently rubbing the back of her neck.

“I-I’m not saying that it’s impossible, honey! I’m just saying…Gabe was not a people-person.” Lucifer said. “He always spent so much time in The Archives that he considered books his only real friends. He hated talking to other people…he’s kinda like your Uncle Leviathan the more I think about it, except with a lot less self-insecurity.”

J chuckled. “That is true. But, it was more or less that his special someone found him… it took forever for them to get together though. We all spied on their first date just to make sure Gabriel wouldn’t mess up and keep them in the friend zone.”

Vaggie hummed. “Didn’t think God’s Messenger would be so bad with people…”

“He usually sent holograms to do it for him. ‘No one can shoot the messenger if he’s not really there’ he would say.” J said before they stopped walking. “Ah. We have arrived.”

Charlie looked up and saw they were in some kind of black and gold temple of some kind. It was the only place in Heaven that seemed to have black in it, and it stuck out like a sore thumb.

“Ohhh, Azzy’s place!” Lucifer grinned. “Is he still Mr. Gloomy and Edgy?”

“No.” J said.

Lucifer blinked. “Oh.”

They all walked inside and were face to face with one of the Archangels. His skin was white, but his hair and outfit was almost entirely black with a large golden cross on the chest.

The Archangel looked up with a wide grin. “Hey, Jesus!!! Luci!!! And you must be Charlie!!!”

Lucifer blinked. “…Azzy??”

“Charlie? Vaggie? This is Azrael, The Angel of Death.” J introduced.

Vaggie’s eye widened. “The Angel of what now?”

Azrael then teleported over to Charlie and hugged her tightly. “Oh, look at you!!! You’re practically the spitting image of your dad!!!”

Charlie grinned wide and hugged back. “It’s so nice to meet you, Uncle Azrael!!!”

“Oh, call me Uncle Azzy! Or maybe Uncle Ray-Ray! Hearing you call me my full name makes me sound too professional, ha! And we’re family!!!” Azrael said as he spun Charlie around before setting her down. “Oh, and there he is!!! Mr. Rebel himself!!! Lucifer!!! Bring it in, big bro-“

Lucifer held his cane in front of him. “Who are you and what have you done with Azrael?”

Azrael blinked and then laughed. “Jeez, Samael. Can’t a guy change over a millennia or two?”

“I mean, yeah, but…what the f*ck happened?” Lucifer asked. “Last we saw each other, you were all dark and gloomy! You wore a large cloak and everything! I even heard your job got worse after humanity started coming in!”

Charlie blinked. “Ummm, what is your job exactly?”

“I’m glad you asked!” Azrael smiled. “As the Angel of Death, I’m the one who goes to Earth the most to guide passing or stray souls to their respective afterlife!”

Vaggie stepped forward. “So…you’re basically the Grim Reaper?”

“Pretty much, yeah! Watch this.” Azrael said as he waved his hand in front of his face and revealed a skull. “Got a bone to pick with me?”

Charlie couldn’t help but giggle. “Now, now! Let’s not get too humerus!”

Lucifer grinned wide. “Oh, throw him a bone, Charlie! He’s working at a dead-end job!”

The three laughed while Vaggie and J just watched, clearly a little unamused by the puns.

Azrael then turned his face back to normal. “I was also a creepy wolf for a little while! Had some sickles, it was sweet!”

“But, still…what changed, little bro?” Lucifer asked. “I mean! It’s not that I don’t like the new change, I’m just surprised!!!”

Azrael’s smile softened and he chuckled. “…well, I was still all dark and gloomy for a while. Especially when humanity started to grow and it was my job to help their souls cross over into the afterlife…it was pretty depressing as humanity started to grow. I’ve had to comfort and guide a lot of souls who died before their time…”

He then sighed. “I’ve met plenty of elders who were practically waiting for me and greeted me like an old friend…and I might’ve met more who were so confused and even scared of me. For the longest time, I had to just stay strong…I didn’t get why Dad gave me this job where I would have to see such horrible deaths take place…don’t think I’ll ever forget the first child death…”

Charlie’s heart practically shattered and she hugged Azrael, her eyes watering.

Azrael smiled and patted her back. “But…that’s when I realized how… special life is. I understood why Dad loved Earth so much because it’s billions of lives with billions more stories to tell. And I get to be there at the end…whether it be to hear all of it unfold from a grandpa who had just passed away or help explore the next chapter of their existence from a teen who just so happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. You only get one life after all, even people like us can have our lives taken out of nowhere. And that just changed my attitude completely!”

“Wow…” Vaggie breathed.

Lucifer chuckled. “Well…I’m glad to hear that, Azzy.”

“…buuuut, I still like to be scary once in a while.” Azrael chuckled. “You should’ve seen how terrified this one guy was of me. He knew he had done some bad sh*t and I was after him. It was one of the few times I’d have to hunt down a sinful soul and drag ‘em to Hell.”

“Gee, thanks for giving us another.” Lucifer half-joked.

Azrael rubbed the back of his neck before turning to Charlie. “But! I hear you’ve opened up a hotel and are now rehabilitating Sinners!!! As someone whose heard a lot of tragic lives? You’ve got my respect, Char. If you ever need to talk about ‘em, I’m your guy.”

Charlie giggled. “I will!!! Besides, I wanna get to know you all more!”

“And don’t let all Sinners in. It’s good to wanna help them, but not all of them are worthy of your kindness. Just saying, keep an eye out.” Azrael said.

Vaggie chuckled as she held Charlie’s hand. “That’s why I help her. I’m her voice of reason. I’m Vaggie.”

“Vaggie?” Azrael hummed. “Vaggie, Vaggie…where have I heard that name before…”

Vaggie sighed. “I was an Exorci-“

“I know!!! You were Raph’s top student!” Azrael cried. “Oh, he would never stop bragging about you! Pretty sure Adam’s bed-squeeze got super jealous!”

Lucifer blinked. “Wait, wait…Raph trained Vaggie?”

“Oh, yes. I forgot to mention that.” J chuckled. “Raphael has trained all The Exorcists before putting them under Adam’s command.”

“He kiiinda wants to shrivel up and die at the mention of that asshat though.” Azrael said. “So sorry you had to put up with the First Idiot, Vaggie.”

Vaggie blinked. “It’s, uhh, it’s fine.”

Charlie gasped. “You knew my family, mi amor!?!”

“Well, I didn’t exactly know he was your uncle.” Vaggie said. “But, uhh, yeah. He was my teacher.”

“Mr. Grumpy-Grump finally got a job he liked doing.” Lucifer grinned.

J hummed as he made another portal. “Speaking of which, I believe that is who we should visit next. Would you care to join us, brother?”

“Oh! Of course!” Azrael said. “My other me is still on Earth anyway.”

Charlie blinked. “Other you?”

“Oh, yeah!” Azrael nodded as they began walking towards the portal. “So, what really helped my mood change was Dad giving me the ability to basically split myself in two like he can, except he can do it however many times he wants. One’s on Earth guiding the souls and the other’s here! Me and me switch shifts.”

Vaggie blinked. “Why did that help?”

“Vaggie, I dunno if you know this…but humans die a lot.” Azrael said. “Which means I had to go there one by one. I hardly got a chance to sit before I had to go back to Earth again. It was literally driving me insane. Sooo, Dad gave me the power and now I’m able to take a friggin’ vacation and keep working! It’s, uhh, kinda hard to explain how it really works and even then, takes a lot of focus to keep up. Cosmic all-seeingness and all that.”

“Best not to question it.” Lucifer said as they all walked through the portal and it closed behind them.

Chapter 24: Episode 24: Raphael

Chapter Text

“Okay, I actually do have one more question. And since you’re the Angel of Death, figured you’d know.” Vaggie said.

Azrael turned. “What’s up?”

“So…when Sinners or Winners die by a regular means, they regenerate. Right?”

Azrael nodded. “Yyyup. Winners don’t usually have to regenerate cause it’s not like there’s any lethal threat in Heaven that would willingly hurt them.”

“But when Heavenborn and Hellborn die, they don’t…so…what’s up with that?” Vaggie asked. “We have souls too.”

Charlie blinked. “That’s…actually a good point! I mean, their souls have to go somewhere, right?”

Lucifer blinked. “Damn. Not even I know. Azzy?”

“Oh! Well, it’s actually pretty simple!” Azrael said. “Okay, so you know Heaven and Hell? Well, those aren’t the only two planes of existence that a soul can go to. There’s Purgatory and Limbo.”

Charlie gasped. “Limbo?! Like the party game?!”

J chuckled. “No, dear niece. Limbo as in the realm. Limbo is essentially…storage for souls when their fates are uncertain. Hellborn and Heavenborn, if they were to ever die, would arrive there. They’ll either await Father’s choice to resurrect them or await reincarnation, which is where they are given a new life. More often than not, it’s the second one. Father doesn’t like to resurrect people unless he truly deems it necessary.”

“And Purgatory is kinda like the middle ground of Heaven and Hell.” Azrael explained. “Hellborn and Heavenborn don’t end up there, but when a human soul is morally gray…that’s where they end up. They’ll stay there until it’s decided they should go to Heaven or Hell. Think of it like a courtroom with a judge deciding if they’re guilty or innocent. The realm itself is the judge. Although, sometimes I would know right away and wouldn’t have to take them to Purgatory.”

Vaggie blinked. “Wait…so…you knew what gets a soul into Heaven?”

“Well, duh. Dad told us.” Azrael said. “And before you ask, I was just way too busy to even tell Sera and the other members of the High Council. I also just…assumed they knew. And now you guys know that Redemption was the plan for Hell from the beginning. Still super proud of you, Char!”

Lucifer smiled. “That’s my girl…”

Charlie giggled. “Awwww, Dad!”

J then stopped walking. “We have arrived. Brothers, Vaggie, and my dear niece…I present to you General Raphael. Angel of Healing and general of all of Heaven’s armies.”

Lucifer blinked. “Wait, wait…General?”

Vaggie then looked across from them and her eye widened when nostalgia hit her like a truck.

In front of them all was a large obstacle course with soldiers, both male and female this time, running across it. They were all moving with speed and skill that The Exorcists had displayed during the Exterminations, with the majority of them not nearly as good. These must have all been cadets.

And in the middle of it all was an Archangel wearing a white and gold general’s uniform that looked quite similar to the one Pentious wore when they fought Adam. Minus the hat. He had a stern face, hands behind his back, and brown hair to go with his white skin.

“Hussle, maggots! Hussle! I’ve seen Cherubs fly better than that!” Raphael exclaimed.

“SIR YES SIR!” They all shouted back as they started moving faster.

Vaggie then slowly hid behind Azrael, clearly a bit nervous for her old teacher to see her again. If he would even recognize her.

Charlie blinked. “…the Angel of Healing is a drill sergeant?”

“Confusing, is it not?” J asked.

Azrael shrugged. “Dad just thought this job suited him better. Michael’s still the Angel of War, but Raph just now commands the armies.”

“Being super angry? Getting to boss people around?” Lucifer grinned. “Oh, this is perfect for him. HEY, RAPH!!! ”

Raphael’s eyes widened and he whipped around…and they quickly narrowed.

“Samael…CADETS! FRONT AND CENTER!!!”

“SIR YES SIR!!!” The cadets cried as they stood behind Raphael immediately.

Raphael then walked over. “The King of Hell himself has finally returned to his old stomping grounds…”

Lucifer just grinned. “Missed you too, Raph…did you dye your hair brown? It’s boring. Like your personality.”

Raphael’s eye twitched, but he kept his composure. He then noticed Charlie and his eyes widened…and he actually smiled. “Charlotte.”

Charlie, clearly a bit intimidated by his demeanor, slowly stepped forward. “Ummm…hi, Uncle- I mean…sir?”

“Way to go, Raph. You made her scared of you. Great first impression.” Azrael mumbled.

Raphael rolled his eyes before he stepped forward and shook Charlie’s hand. “No need to be formal, Charlotte. You are our guest and I am not your superior officer, nor should I be. You can call me Uncle if you want.”

Charlie blinked. “Oh! Umm…alright! It’s super nice to meet you, Uncle Raph!!!”

“It’s nice to meet you too.” Raphael nodded. “And it is nice to see you too, brothers…and Samael.”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed. “Still pissed I kicked your ass back then?”

“Dad!” Charlie cried. “And Uncle Raph, that was mean! Dad’s still your brother!”

Raphael sighed. “…very well. I apologize, brother.”

“Sorry too.” Lucifer said, unable to get mad at Charlie.

“We simply came to visit.” J said. “Charlie wants to meet the rest of her family during her time here in Heaven. I pray we have not interrupted.”

Raphael hummed. “Just a simple drill- wait a second. Who is that behind you, Azrael?”

Azrael blinked and turned. “Oh! C’mon, Vaggie. He’s not that scary.”

Raphael’s eyes widened. “Vaggie?”

Vaggie then slowly snuck out, and was about to wave before she switched it to a salute. “Sir.”

Raphael rubbed his eyes…before he laughed . “Well, I’ll be damned by Father himself!!! Cadets! My top student has finally returned!”

The cadets then began…clapping, as if they were honoring a hero.

Vaggie blinked. “…ummm-“

“You’ve grown out your hair, soldier. And…lost an eye.” Raphael hummed. “Lute?”

Vaggie sighed. “Lute.”

Raphael rolled his eyes. “Could never get over her jealousy. But if Lute’s lack of an appendage is anything to go by, you showed her what you were truly capable of! I expected no less from you. Even when you were just a cadet, you were my best student!!! Loyal, ferocious, quick, agile, and strong. ”

Vaggie just seemed surprised that she was still the favorite despite having lost to Lute.

“And cadets! What do I always teach you?”

“Don’t listen to anyone who thinks genocide is a good idea.” The cadets said, seeming tired after having to repeat that so many times.

Raphael then shook his head in disgrace as he recalled a memory. “I can’t believe I was stupid enough to allow Adam of all slobs to take command of you and the other Exorcists.”

“Wait…The Exorcists weren’t meant for the Exterminations?” Charlie asked.

Raphael shook his head again. “No. The Exorcists were meant to kill demons if need be, yes, but only if they were to ever start an uprising or meddle in the affairs of Earth.”

Vaggie snarled. “And then Adam decided to switch it…”

“If he was still here, I would personally chop off his dick with my axe…” Raphael mumbled.

Azrael blinked and shyly looked to the side, figuring it wasn’t a good idea to tell them Adam was still alive in Hell.

“Well, Uncle Raph! Vaggie is not only back…but she’s my girlfriend!” Charlie smiled.

Vaggie blushed, gently squeezing Charlie’s hand.

Raphael blinked. “That’s…unexpected. I always assumed you were into women, but…never my own niece. Well, you have my full support. Charlie, you will never have to worry about anything with Vaggie by your side.”

Vaggie sighed. “S-sir, I’m not that good…”

Raphael’s eyes narrowed. “…Charlie, how well did she defend that hotel when Adam attacked?”

“She had the most badass costume I had ever seen and she killed a bunch of other Exorcists with no effort…and looked really hot while doing it.” Charlie said, her face slowly turning red.

Vaggie whipped around. “CHARLIE!!!”

Raphael then laughed as he clapped. “YES!!! That is what I was hoping you’d say!!! Cadets, take this as a lesson! Work hard enough and you may be able to surpass or rival Vaggie one day!”

His eyes then lit up and he began walking away. “As a matter of fact…cadets, spread out!”

The cadets then did as they were told, spreading out and taking a seat.

Vaggie blinked. “Ummm…sir-“

Then, she was tossed a holy spear into her hands.

Raphael grabbed a halberd, spinning it around before tapping it against the ground. “Attack me.”

Lucifer’s eyes widened. “Wait, what?”

“Raph, Dad said no fights.” Azrael said.

Raphael chuckled. “This isn’t a fight. It’s sparring. No cuts or lethal blows shall be dealt. I just want to see how much she’s improved.”

Charlie tapped her fingers together nervously. “I-I mean-“

“Alright.” Vaggie said, cracking her neck.

Charlie’s eyes widened. “Eh?”

Azrael grinned a bit. “This should be good.”

Vaggie then dashed forward, swinging her spear against Raphael’s halberd.

Raphael smirked and then pushed her back as he swung his halberd at Vaggie’s spear, with Vaggie blocking the blade with the handle.

Vaggie’s eye then narrowed and her wings spread wide as she took off into the air and then threw her spear forward at Raphael’s halberd, knocking it right out of his hands.

Raphael laughed as all six of his wings spread wide and he flew after her. The two then began punching and kicking at each other while their wings carried them around the air, but both just kept blocking each other’s attacks.

And as the sparring match progressed, they started to go faster. Their punches were thrown at lightning speed and they were spinning around like tornadoes with every kick or blow. It was almost like watching two blurs clash against each other over and over again.

Eventually, Raphael punched Vaggie in the shoulder and then flew behind her and dealt another blow to her back with his foot, causing her to fall to the ground.

Vaggie groaned in pain, but quickly dodged another punch from her teacher as she landed. She then reached over and grabbed both her spear and Raphael’s halberd, throwing them at him.

Raphael caught both, before spinning them around before stopping with a rather satisfying shing sound.

“sh*t.” Vaggie muttered before she got up, putting her fists up.

Raphael hummed and then tossed the weapons aside before dashing toward, punching and kicking at Vaggie again, with Vaggie using her arms to shield the blows. “Blocking and defending yourself! That’s not what I taught you!”

“Well!” Vaggie cried as she blocked another kick, remembering what Carmilla Carmine had taught her before Adam’s attack. “I had more than one teacher.”

Raphael smirked. “Good! Because no one is invincible to harm!”

He then used his wings to smack Vaggie across the face before he kicked her again, with her landing on the ground. “But as impressive as it is for you to match an opponent, the key is how you overpower them in the end.”

Vaggie then looked around for any kind of environmental advantage…and then she spotted something.

A soccer ball. One of the cadets must’ve brought it. And she recalled that she had actually been trying soccer as her hobby.

“I think I got an idea.” Vaggie said as she kicked at Raphael’s leg and then took off into the air. She then landed and threw the ball up before kicking it at her former mentor.

Raphael’s eyes widened and like a whiplash, the ball struck him right in the face and he tumbled to the ground.

The cadets, Charlie, Lucifer, J, and Azrael all gasped .

Vaggie then grabbed her spear and pointed it at Raphael. “…looks like I win.”

Raphael held his cheek before he laughed , sitting up. “And you wonder why you were my top student!”

Vaggie then stabbed her spear into the ground and offered a hand. “Thank you, sir.”

“Call me Raphael, Vaggie. You aren’t my student anymore.” He said as he took Vaggie’s hand and was helped to his feet. “I’m very proud of you…granted, I was going easy on you for the first half. But after that, I have the feeling that you could possibly beat me in an actual fight.”

Vaggie’s eye widened. “You’re…you’re serious?”

“I always am.” Raphael said before turning to his brothers and niece. “I take it we’re going to the others? May I come along?”

J nodded as he snapped another portal. “Let us go then.”

Raphael then turned to his cadets. “20 laps and then you all may take a break for the rest of the day.”

“Sir yes sir!” The cadets cried as they ran off.

Vaggie then walked over before Lucifer laughed and hugged her.

“THAT WAS AWESOME, VAGGIE!!!” Lucifer cackled. “YOU TOOK HIM DOWN!!!”

Vaggie chuckled. “T-thanks, your highness…”

“Charlie, wasn’t that awesome?” Lucifer asked before blinking. “Kiddo?”

Charlie was completely red in the face, absolutely frozen as she stared at her girlfriend.

Vaggie’s eye widened and she rushed over. “Charlie?! Charlie, mi amor!?!”

“S-so cool…” Charlie squeaked. “I-I’m so f*cking lucky…”

Raphael then began walking towards the portal. “Who is next?”

“Camael.” J said.

Raphael’s eyes narrowed. “Great…”

“Oh, what’s changed about Cammy?” Lucifer asked.

Raphael sighed. “Absolutely nothing.”

Chapter 25: Episode 25: Camael

Chapter Text

After another quick walk through a portal, they arrived in…a forest?

The trees were made of golden bark and even golden leaves, but the gold color was in different shades. It was rather beautiful.

Charlie walked closer before she sighed. “Just when I thought Heaven couldn’t get any more peaceful…”

Vaggie walked beside her girlfriend. “Yeah, it’s a nice place. It was just nice of your grandpa to allow everyone to stay here for a while.”

“How do you think the others are doing?” Charlie asked.

Vaggie blinked. “…I…don’t think you wanna hear what I think, hun.”

Lucifer looked around. “So, Cammy’s supposed to be here?”

“My portals aren’t usually wrong, but there is a first time for everything.” J said to himself as he looked around.

Azrael whistled to himself as he began searching.

Lucifer then looked at his stoic brother. “Sooo, Raph. Whaddya mean by absolutely nothing has changed with Camael?”

Raphael sighed. “She’s still an immature little girl who pulls ridiculous pranks. As one of Father’s children, she should have more respect for her-“

Lucifer shushed him. “I get enough ‘you should be more regal’ talk from Satan, little brother.”

Raphael’s eyes narrowed. “Get your hand away from me, Samael. I may be happy to see Charlie, but that doesn’t erase what you did all those years ago…”

Lucifer’s eyes briefly glowed red. “Oh my Dad! It’s Lucifer!"

“Samael was the name you were given. I shall refer to you as such.”

“I changed it because it was stupid!!! Not all our names have to rhyme!!!” Lucifer exclaimed. “You don’t see me calling Charlie ‘Charlel’ or something!!!”

Raphael stepped forward. “Are you challenging me, big brother? It won’t end well for you.”

“OH! OH, I’M SORRY! WHAT FIGHT DID YOU LOSE AGAIN?” Lucifer hummed. “OH, YEAH! THAT’S RIGHT! OUR FIGHT! I KICKED THE ASSES OF ALL OF YOU, ESPECIALLY MICHAEL!!!”

“I wouldn’t mind a rematch.” Raphael sneered.

Lucifer cracked his neck. “OHOHOHO, BRING IT-!”

Charlie then pulled her father and uncle apart. “Hey, hey! Remember what Grandpa said! NO. FIGHTING.”

Lucifer and Raphael gave each other a glare before they sighed. “Sorry…”

Charlie huffed as she set them both down before looking at her other uncles. “Any sign of her?”

Azrael and J were standing beside each other, staring at… something.

Charlie blinked and walked over. “Uncle Azzy? Uncle J- Oh! There she is!”

Vaggie walked over before her eye widened at what they were all looking at.

And in the distance was a large obstacle course made entirely out of the various trees and wood the holy forest had to offer.

The Archangel known as Camael was running across it. She had short hair the exact same color as Lucifer and Charlie’s and matching snowy white skin. She was wearing some kind of outfit that looked like something an Exorcist would wear, with a large golden X on the front of her chest.

Camael ran down her homemade obstacle course with impressive speed before she hopped from one stump to another. She then leapt into the air, grabbing onto a branch and spinning around before landing on the rather thin railing.

She began running down it while dodging spikes and moving wrecking balls made entirely out of wood as well. She jumped through hoops and grabbed onto pillars to get herself through the course even faster.

Then, a moving log with spikes on each end came towards her. She grabbed it and yanked it off its ropes before using it as a shield to protect herself from incoming arrows.

And like it was a set of weights, Camael held it up high as she ran the rest of the course. She was even running down a large tightrope, not even bothering to look down at the massive gap between the forest and mountain it was tied to.

In great speed, she made it to the mountaintop and tossed the log aside. And then, a sign that read the word ‘GOAL’ was just a few feet away from her…and right behind a large boulder that was rolling right towards her.

Camael smirked and ran right at the boulder, punching it and shattering it into thousands of pieces before she crossed the sign, even spinning it around.

She then jumped up and down, punching the air. “WOOHOO!!! NEW RECORD, BABY!!!”

Azrael then called out. “YO, CAMMY!!! COME DOWN AND MEET YOUR NIECE!!!”

Camael blinked and turned around. “My what now- OH!”

And despite being rather far away from them, she could see her brothers and niece just fine. Camael then leapt into the air and all six of her wings spread as she flew over, landing in front of them in seconds.

J smiled. “Charlie? This is your Aunt Camael, Angel of Courage.”

Charlie walked forward. “Hi-“

Camael then suddenly threw Charlie into a bear hug, laughing. “Hey there, Char-Char!!! Man, look how tall you are! Why are you dressed like a waiter?”

Charlie rapidly patted her aunt’s back. “N-need to breathe…!”

“Oh, sh*t! Sorry.” Camael said as she dropped her niece, helping her stand back up and even brushing her off. “Forget how strong I am sometimes, heh!”

Charlie let out a giggle once she regained her ability to breathe. “N-no worries, I might need to start lifting a bit after a hug like that!”

Vaggie couldn’t help but go red at the thought of her girlfriend gaining a bit of muscle.

Camael laughed. “Still!!! Nice to meet you!!! You’re the spitting image of your dad! Speaking of which…”

Lucifer stepped forward. “Hey, Cammy.”

“Luci!!! How ya doing, ya prideful midget!?” Camael grinned as she put her brother in a headlock to give him a noogie. “I swear to Pops, you got even shorter!”

Lucifer thrashed around. “CAM, LET ME GO!!!”

“Alright, alright, ya big baby.” Camael said as she freed her brother. “Azzy! Jesus! Raph! Long time no see!”

Azrael chuckled. “Is this what you’ve been doing to keep yourself entertained, sis?”

“Well, yeah! What am I supposed to do, just lay down and glue my eyes to my phone all day?” Camael asked. “I love that thing as much as the next person, but c’mon. Outside. Grass. It’s nice…I might’ve killed a bird on accident though while making that course over there.”

Raphael sighed. “You have so much potential, little sister. Your speed and strength are unimaginable, and you waste it on your games-“

“UGHHHH, LIGHTEN UP!” Camael groaned. “Sheesh! You wonder why Azazel hates you? This. This is why.”

“We don’t mention him.” Raphael sneered, not wanting to be reminded of the second Fallen Angel.

Charlie blinked as she stepped over, knowing Azazel since he was somewhat of a family friend. “Ummm…what happened exactly-“

“Please don’t get Raph started.” Camael warned. “Seriously. It’s for your own good.”

Charlie blinked. “…I’ll, uhh, take your word for it.”

“But enough about that! What’s new with you, Char? For example, you gonna introduce me to whoever that is?” Camael asked, pointing at Vaggie. “Love the missing eye by the way! Makes ya look badass!”

Vaggie blinked. “Ummm…thanks?”

Charlie walked over. “Well, Auntie…this is Vaggie! My girlfriend and the manager of my hotel! The one that rehabilitates Sinners!”

Camael blinked. “You got a hotel? Guess that explains the waiter's look.”

Lucifer turned. “Did…did Dad not tell you why we’re even allowed up here?”

“Y’know, he probably did…but I might’ve been super distracted by a cute gal that walked right by.” Camael hummed. “All I heard was ‘Blah blah blah, Charlie’s your niece, blah blah blah, Lucifer’s coming too’.”

Lucifer sighed. “Great to see you haven’t changed a bit, sis.”

“Hey! I’ve totally changed!” Camael cried. “Well, physically anyway…that’s what you meant, right?”

Lucifer shook his head.

“Ah. Well, f*ck.” Camael blinked. “But back to Vaggie! You’re Raph’s favorite, right?”

“I…suppose.” Vaggie said.

Camael nodded as she walked over, shaking her hand. “Well, good to meet who he bragged about so much! And Char, good to see we have something in common!”

“Girls being pretty?”

“Girls being pretty.” Camael nodded. “And speaking of, I’m kinda curious! What do your wings look like?”

Charlie's eyes widened. “…m-my wings?”

“Yeah! Y’know! Every Morningstar worth the title’s got some!” Camael said.

Lucifer walked over. “I…don’t think Charlie has wings.”

“Did you ever find out?” Camael asked.

Lucifer was about to answer, but nothing came out.

“Exactly. And hey, what better time than now to find out?” Camael asked.

Vaggie quickly got in front of Charlie. “W-with all due respect, I don’t think I want my girlfriend being tossed off a mountain to see if she can fly.”

Camael looked at Raphael. “Sheesh, did you do that to her?”

Raphael didn’t answer.

“But no, we’re not doing that.” Camael said. “You’re my niece and I’ll go easy on you. One of us is simply going to carry you into the sky and then drop you over a trampoline or something! It’s like skydiving!”

Charlie blinked…before she tapped her chin as she began to think about it.

Vaggie gulped. “Y-you, uhhh, you sure that’s a good idea-“

“LET’S DO IT!!!” Charlie cried.

Lucifer then walked over. “Alright, but we’ll be right there to catch you! You don’t have to worry about a thing, kiddo.”

Charlie nodded rapidly. “Okay, okay, okay!!! I’m ready!!!”

Lucifer then held his daughter and flew up with her, only hovering a short distance away from the ground. Long enough for his daughter to possibly start flying.

He then snapped his fingers and summoned a large bouncy castle for her to land in.

Vaggie’s teeth were jittering before Azrael handed her a squishy ball.

“One of Michael’s stress toys.” Azrael said.

Vaggie grabbed it and squeezed it so hard that it broke, so Azrael just handed her another one.

Camael then gave the thumbs up. “Okay! Do it now!!!”

Lucifer looked at Charlie. “Just aim for the bouncy castle. And I’ll be right there to catch you too, okay?”

Charlie nodded. “Got it!!!”

Lucifer then took a deep breath and dropped her.

Charlie fell through the air…and rather unexpectedly, six wings popped right out of her back. But they weren’t angel wings.

…or rather…not just angel wings.

All six of the wings were red dragon-like wings, but with white and red feathers covering the majority of the scales of the demon side.

The wings flapped and stopped Charlie from falling. Charlie’s eyes widened and she looked behind her with a gasp. “I HAVE WINGS!!!”

“SHE HAS WINGS!!!” Lucifer and Vaggie exclaimed in shock and awe.

Camael grinned. “HAHA! Knew it!!! And they look awesome!!!”

“Demon and Angel…how fitting.” J hummed.

Raphael turned. “How so?”

“Charlie is arguably the bridge that has bonded both Heaven and Hell together after millennia. It only makes sense that her wings represent that bridge. A Princess of demons with the hope of an angel.” J said.

Azrael chuckled. “You were always the poetic one, little brother.”

Charlie’s wings kept flapping…before they started carrying her away. “UHHH, HOW DO I GET DOWN!?!”

“Oh, sh*t.” Everyone said in unison as they quickly flew after her.

Chapter 26: Episode 26: Gabriel and Uriel

Chapter Text

After about 30 minutes or so of trying to get Charlie back down and then teaching her how to actually control her own wings, they moved on to the next visit.

“Welcome…to the Heavenly Archives.” J introduced.

Charlie’s eyes sparkled as she was met with a gigantic library filled with books and scrolls and all kinds of literature. There were almost too many books to count.

“Man, did this place get bigger?” Lucifer mumbled. “And why isn’t anyone else here?”

“This is merely the private books section where Gabriel likes to spend most of his time. The main lobby is much bigger.” Raphael explained. “I’ll admit, I can see why he likes this place so much.”

Camael hummed. “Yeah, I do like the vibe! Very zen.”

Azrael then turned to his siblings. “But now begs the question: where’s Gabe?”

Then, all of them heard a small sound in the distance. They looked at each other before slowly walking over to the sound as it got clearer and clearer.

“Okay! This one too! Heads up!”

“G-Gabriel, I only have two arms!”

Charlie then peeked over and saw not one, but two Archangels with the exact same hair color as her father and her.

One of them was on a ladder and wearing a white suit, a pair of black boots and a black vest, and a nifty golden tie.

The other was at the bottom, wearing something that looked straight out of The Revolutionary War, trying to catch all the books that his brother was throwing down at him.

“Okay! This one too!” Gabriel said. “Wait…does Charlie even like geological facts? Maybe!”

He then dropped the book and the one below had to catch it with his foot. “Gabriel, I do suggest a better way of doing this!”

Camael then grinned mischievously as she rubbed her hands together before cupping her mouth. “HEY, NERDS!!!”

Gabriel yelped like a little girl before he fell off the ladder and right onto his brother, with all the books they were gathering spilling across the floor.

Charlie gasped and quickly rushed over to help. “AUNT CAMMY, WHY DID YOU DO THAT!?!”

Camael walked over to help as well. “Hey, hey, relax! This is not the first time I’ve done this! Besides, keeps them on their toes!”

After cleaning and stacking all of the books, Charlie then helped Gabriel and her other uncle up.

“Thanks.” Gabriel said before his eyes widened. “OH MY FATHER, YOU’RE ALREADY HERE!!!”

Charlie smiled wide. “Hi!!! You must be my…Uncle Gabriel!”

“That is correct, Charlie.” J said. “Allow me to introduce Gabriel, Angel of Revelation. And Uriel, Angel of Wisdom.”

Uriel dusted himself off before taking a bow. “It’s an honor to meet you, my dear niece.”

“U-uhh, hi!” Gabriel said with a nervous wave and grin.

Charlie then shook both of their hands. “It’s super nice to meet you both!!! I honestly didn’t expect two of my uncles to be here!!!”

“Gabriel requested my help.” Uriel chuckled. “He wanted to give you some stories to read as a ‘Welcome to the family’ present. Did as much research as he could on you to see what you liked.”

Gabriel rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I-I, uhh, w-wanted to make a good first impression! Do…do you even like books?”

Charlie then hugged her uncle. “That was so sweet of you!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!”

“I told you she’d like it, brother.” Uriel chuckled before walking over to his siblings. “Also, I shall get you back for that, Camael.”

Camael grinned. “Another prank war?”

“No, I learned my lesson from that. Our revenge shall come when you least expect it.” Uriel said with an almost evil grin.

Camael’s eyes widened. “…uh oh…”

Uriel then faced the rest of his family. “Azrael, Jesus, Raphael…and Lucifer.”

“Hey, Uriel.” Lucifer said with a grin. “Still dressing up like you’re from the 1700’s?”

Uriel chuckled. “Still dressing up like you’re the ringmaster of a circus?”

“Hell’s basically one giant circus that I gotta manage.” Lucifer shrugged.

Uriel laughed and then actually hugged his brother for a moment. “It’s good to see you again, big brother. Truly, I mean that.”

Lucifer smiled a bit. “Thanks…you too.”

“Awwwww…” Azrael smiled. “How come I didn’t get a hug?”

“I was shocked, what can I say?”

Uriel then turned. “Ah! And you must be Vaggie. Charlie's girlfriend, yes?”

Vaggie shook his hand. “Man, I’m…I’m just surprised you all know about me.”

“Why wouldn’t we? You’re Raphael’s top student, the defender of our niece's hotel while being her lover, and the third Fallen Angel.” Uriel smiled. “The second being-“

Raphael sneered. “We. Don’t. Talk. About. Him.”

“…Azazel.” Uriel said.

Raphael groaned, rubbing the brink of his nose. “What did I just say?!”

“Sir- I mean…Raphael.” Vaggie corrected. “What exactly bothers you about this Azazel guy anyway? Did…did he start a rebellion too or-?”

“Not exactly?” Azrael said. “I mean. He was a rebel. Didn’t really like Dad.”

J nodded. “But the reasoning for his exile is because he was…well…let’s just say, he had a fondness for human women.”

Camael shrugged. “Can’t say I blame him for that.”

“So…you kicked him out just because he liked girls?” Vaggie asked, tilting her head.

Raphael sighed, his eyes narrowing. “It wasn’t that. We were fine with that. What we had a problem with was what he and his followers did…he slept with a bunch of them, giving birth to creatures called Nephilim. A mix of human and Angel.”

“Think sort of like a demigod in Greek mythology and various other myths beyond.” Uriel explained. “A mortal with holy power in great amounts. Needless to say, Father… panicked.”

Raphael huffed. “I dealt with Azazel and now he’s stuck in the desert on Earth alongside his followers, unable to give birth to more Nephilim…a fitting punishment for that Goat f*cker...”

“Okay…what happened to the ones that were born?” Vaggie asked.

Uriel’s eyes softened. “Some were purged of their powers…others were…were killed by a powerful mistress of chaos. It’s not a story we like to talk about, so…perhaps we should move on?”

Vaggie blinked. “Uhhh. Right, of course.”

Charlie and Gabriel then walked back over. “And this is my girlfriend, Vaggie!”

Gabriel gave a bit of a wave. “H-hello! I, uhh, I heard a lot about you.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you too.” Vaggie said.

Lucifer waved. “Hey, Gabe.”

Gabriel smiled wide. “Luci! It’s been a long time!!! How are you?”

“Honestly? Doing great!” Lucifer laughed.

“And how’s Lilith?”

Lucifer’s heart sank. “…less great now…”

Charlie’s eyes softened. “Umm…Uncle Gabe? Mom hasn’t…hasn’t been seen in a while.”

Gabriel’s eyes widened. “W-wait, what!?”

Camael walked over. “Seriously!? But…but you two were nuts for each other back in Eden!”

“I have to admit, not even I knew this.” J said.

Uriel turned to his older brother. “Are we allowed to ask what happened…?”

Lucifer looked at Charlie for a moment, as if to see if she was uncomfortable with the topic. He then took a deep breath. “We…we got into a pretty big fight about the Exterminations and…and next thing I knew, she was gone. Without a trace.”

Even Raphael’s eyes softened. “ …oh… ”

“sh*t…Luci, I…we had no idea.” Azrael said. “Have you tried looking for her?”

Lucifer nodded. “Spent the first two years looking for her all across Hell and…and even Earth in some cases. I don’t know where else she could’ve gone…but if I haven’t found her, she doesn’t want to be found.”

Charlie’s heart sank and she hugged herself, with Vaggie even holding her close with her wing to comfort her girlfriend.

“…m-moving on from that…” Lucifer said, rubbing his wedding ring. “It’s still good to see you two again. Honestly, should’ve expected you two to be together. You were always the brainiest of our family.”

Uriel chuckled. “Wisdom and Intelligence go hand in hand, do they not?”

“Y-yeah, we make a pretty good team…” Gabriel said. “Plus, Uri’s written some of the books here.”

Charlie gasped. “You’re a writer, Uncle Uriel?!”

“In my spare time, yes.” Uriel nodded.

Lucifer grinned. “And the others tell me that you finally met a special someone, Gabe!”

Gabriel’s eyes widened and his cheeks reddened. “R-right, uhh…figured they’d tell you. Y-yeah, I met someone…h-he’s really great. His name’s Nico…he’s actually a Winner too.”

“Still don’t know why we call the human souls that.” Uriel said.

Azrael hummed. “Winner? Sinner? Human souls were good enough to win Heaven? Y’know?”

“Still frivolous.” Uriel said.

Charlie squealed a bit before she calmed herself down. “Well!!! I’m super happy for you, Uncle!!!”

“Thanks, Char…” Gabriel smiled.

Charlie then went over and scooped up all the books that Gabriel was planning on giving her. “And now I know what to fill the hotel’s library with!!!”

Vaggie chuckled. “That’s great, hun.”

“So! Who's last on the reunion train?” Lucifer said. “Out of my 7 siblings!”

Azrael blinked. “Uhhh…you forgot Michael-“

“Out of my 7 siblings.” Lucifer repeated.

J sighed. “I believe next would be Jophiel…and after her would be Michael-“

“HAHA, NO IDEA WHO YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT.” Lucifer said with his eye twitching.

‘How many people does Lucifer just get himself into beef with? First Alastor, then my teacher, and now this?’ Vaggie thought.

Chapter 27: Episode 27: Jophiel

Chapter Text

“I gotta admit, I don’t think I’ve ever been through so many portals in my life until now.” Charlie said as she and the now larger group walked through another heavenly portal.

“Heaven is a big place. Not exactly very easy to traverse on foot unless you like walking.” Uriel said.

Azrael blinked. “…wait…can’t all of us fly?”

Everyone looked at each other almost…awkwardly. There was just silence.

“…portals are faster.” J finally said before smiling. “But, we are nearly done. Jophiel is this way.”

The walk was rather quick before they arrived at…a large playground. Possibly the biggest Charlie had ever seen. And hundreds of children were playing on it. Some older, some younger, and some were just at a picnic table with their families. Parents, siblings, guardians, or even just a friend.

Lucifer blinked. “This is where Jophy is?”

“I-I always forget how crowded this place is.” Gabriel mumbled.

Uriel squinted his eyes before he grinned. “Ah! There she is.”

And in the distance was another Archangel. Pale white skin and rather beautiful blonde hair matching the majority of her siblings and Charlie. She was wearing a white dress, black pants with large white boots, and a golden stole with white feathers at the edge.

A group of children were surrounding her, with Jophiel closing her eyes.

“1…2…3…” Jophiel counted.

The various children started to giggle and laugh as they ran all across the playground.

“4…5…6…7…8…9…10!” Jophiel smiled as she opened her eyes as her wings spread out, taking her into the air. “Ready or not, here I come!”

Lucifer hummed. “She’s a babysitter?”

Raphael shrugged. “More or less. It’s her job to watch over and protect the souls of the children who arrive here until their parents or guardian arrive in case they die before them.”

“…and if they don’t have one?” Vaggie asked, holding Charlie’s hand as she was already beginning to sniffle at the thought of a child dying before their parents.

Azrael’s eyes softened. “Well, they usually live at the orphanage. Jophy goes there so often that she runs the place. And unlike Earth or Hell, it’s actually a pretty nice place.”

“Jophy’s kind of like the mom they never had…” Camael said. “She always wanted to be one, was just always too busy to find the right person.”

“I think that’s why she finds this job so fulfilling. She gets to be one, even if only just for a little while.” J hummed.

Charlie then watched her aunt again, her heart suddenly clenching when she found a child hiding behind a tree.

“Found you!” Jophiel grinned, scooping up a little boy who looked to be some kind of amphibian Winner. He almost looked like Pentious.

The boy laughed. “Awwww, no fair!!!”

Jophiel then set him down. “You almost had me fooled, sweetie!”

Charlie watched the scene, flashing back to when her mother would play hide and seek with her. She would always try to hide in the trees, but could never blend in. Her mother always found her.

Jophiel then spotted her family across from her and gasped before she looked at the boy. “Arthur, could you find everyone for me? There’s some people I need to speak to.”

“Okay, Miss Jophiel!” Arthur said before running off.

Jophiel smiled before she quickly flew over to her family. “Everyone!!! It’s so good to see you!!!”

“Hey, Jophy.” Lucifer said with a wave.

Jophiel gasped and then pulled Lucifer into a tight hug. “Luci!!! It’s been so long!!! I missed you so much, big brother!!!”

Lucifer, thankful that he was still able to breathe in the hug, just smiled. “Good to see you too, sis.”

Jophiel then set him down. “Have you been eating right? Is Hell really as bad as it sounds? How are your wings? Are you stressed-“

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down.” Lucifer said.

Jophiel laughed sheepishly. “Sorry! You know how I am…”

Charlie then snapped out of her run down memory lane and faced her aunt. “Ummm…hi, Aunt Jophiel!”

Jophiel gasped. “You must be Charlie!!! I’ve heard so much about you!!! And look how tall you are! You’re going to make your father feel like he’s shrinking!” She said as she hugged her niece.

Charlie, happy with all the hugs she was getting today, smiled and accepted the embrace.

“It’s my absolute honor to finally have you here!” Jophiel smiled. “I’m very sorry that we didn’t get to meet when you first came here! I need to have a stern talking-to with that Sera! Not letting me see my own niece.”

Azrael chuckled. “Dad already beat you to that. Sera probably feels incredibly humiliated and or ashamed.”

“Can’t say it’s not completely deserved.” Uriel hummed.

“I do feel a little bad for her though.” Gabriel said.

Lucifer just grinned maliciously. “I don’t.”

Jophiel then faced Vaggie. “And you must be the famous Vaggie! I love your hair, sweetie. It suits you! Charlie is a very lucky woman.”

Charlie giggled. “Yes. Yes, I am.”

Vaggie’s eye widened and she was left silent, not used to all the constant praise she had been getting ever since she arrived. Even God himself apologized to her.

“Vaggie?” Jophiel asked.

“S…sorry, I’m just…not used to all the compliments.” Vaggie mumbled.

Jophiel gasped. “I’m surprised no one has complimented you more! Raphael! You were her teacher, are you behind this!?”

“She’s earned my respect, sister.” Raphael sighed. “And please stop acting like you’re the mother none of us have.”

“Well, I am still your sister.” Jophiel huffed. “And you need to start showing more appreciation towards your students! They are putting their lives on the line for Heaven like Vaggie did! And the poor thing could’ve died if Charlie hadn’t found her!”

Vaggie gently walked forward. “M-ma’am, it’s fine. Really. While it still hurt, I…I am honestly glad it happened.”

Gabriel’s eyes widened. “…you are? W-why?”

“I think I may know.” J said. “Because if that had never happened, she would’ve never met Charlie, helped her open her hotel, met all the friends she now has, or find love.”

Vaggie smiled. “Yeah. That’s pretty much it.”

“Well, you won’t have to go through any more struggles like that alone anymore, dear.” Jophiel reassured. “You’re family now.”

Lucifer grinned. “Yes, yes she is. Fallen Angels gotta stick together after all!”

Charlie couldn’t help but squeal a little, absolutely thrilled that her family liked Vaggie as much as she did.

Jophiel then smiled. “Oh, look at all of us. If Father and Michael were here, we’d all be together again after so, so long! Where is Father anyway?”

“Oh! He’s with Alastor!” Charlie said. “He’s a friend of mine.”

Jophiel blinked. “…Alastor…I feel like I’ve heard a friend of mine mention that name. Hmm, small world we live in if true! But I’m sure Father will come around to us eventually! Please tell me we’re going to get Michael too.”

Lucifer slowly backed up.

Camael grinned. “Hell yeah! Get the Morningstars back together!”

“Language, Cammy.” Jophiel said.

J then created a final portal. “Well. I believe we are ready. Is everyone else?”

Azrael grinned. “As I’ll ever be. I miss Mikey.”

Raphael saluted.

Camael crossed her arms with a smirk. “Let’s go see him.”

Uriel chuckled. “It will be nice to finally have the family back together again.”

“Y-yeah! So much time has passed.” Gabriel said.

Jophiel then looked around. “…Charlie, dear? Where is your father?”

Charlie then turned around and saw her dad running away. “NOT AGAIN!!! DAD, GET BACK HERE!!!”

Her new hybrid wings then spread and she flew off, managing to grab her father and begin dragging him back over.

Lucifer clawed at the ground. “MAYBE WE CAN JUST SKIP HIM-“

“WE ARE SEEING MY LAST UNCLE, DAD!!!” Charlie cried as she dragged him back over.

Lucifer groaned as he finally stopped resisting. “Fine! Fine!”

Raphael’s eyes narrowed. “…really, Samael…your own daughter has to babysit you?”

“You all should know how I feel about Michael!” Lucifer said as he stood up, making a pouty face.

Eventually, they all walked through the portal…and arrived inside a house?

A dining room to be specific. And who was there?

Michael Morningstar, two spider Winners…and Angel Dust.

Charlie and Vaggie’s eyes widened. “Angel?!”

“Char? Vags?” Angel asked.

Charlie went over. “What are you doing at my uncle’s house? At…least, I assume this is his house.”

Michael blinked. “Err, yes. It is- Lucifer?”

Lucifer snarled.

“Sweetie, who is this?” One of the Winners asked.

The other gasped. “Oh! Ma, this must be that princess Tony was talkin’ about!”

“Tony?” Vaggie asked.

Angel sighed. “Okay. Lemme explain.”

Chapter 28: Episode 28: Annabelle and Molly

Chapter Text

Angel walked right through the portal that GM had given him and he arrived in…a surprisingly large house. It wasn’t a mansion, but it was definitely big enough for a large family and some guests.

And sure enough, he was right at the door. Angel was about to knock before he stepped back. “sh*t, what am I doing? They’re not gonna recognize me like… this!”

He sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. “If this is even their house…I doubt The Big G would just lie, but…I dunno, maybe being all powerful doesn’t- I don’t even f*ckin’ know what I’m saying…”

He then leaned against the porch, looking down. “And now I’m talking to myself… fantastic.”

But then, a voice suddenly spoke…a familiar one. At least to Angel.

“Uhh…can I help you, stranger?”

Angel’s eyes widened and he turned around to see a spider like him. Although, much less demonic and more friendly.

She had only two arms, but four legs instead. She had long hair, white fluff all around, and an adorable smile to go with a black and pink dress.

“Shi- I mean…I-I’m sorry, I think I’m lost or something.” Angel said.

The spider blinked before giggling. “Don’t worry about it! Heaven’s a pretty big place! Anyway I can help?”

“You don’t know me and you’re already wanting to help?” Angel grinned.

The spider shrugged. “Why not? Just cause I’m dead don’t mean I can’t help someone. It’s how my Ma met my Pa!”

Angel hummed. “Well…okay, this is gonna sound insane. I’m…I’m with God?”

The spider…didn’t look freaked out at all.

“As in, I’m sort of a guest here? I-I’m…I’m actually from Hell.” Angel said.

The spider’s eyes widened then. “Oh! sh*t…”

‘Guess they do swear here.’ Angel thought.

“…well, if God brought ya up here, then maybe you’re apart of that redemption program my cousin’s been settin’ up!” The spider smiled. “Haven’t met my cousin yet, but still!!!”

Angel laughed. “Charlie’s hotel is already well known up here?”

“Yeah, it was all over the news!” The spider grinned. “All any Winner up here talks about nowadays. And that the First Dick died or somethin’.”

“Oh, yeah! I was there!” Angel grinned. “It was hilarious.”

“Dick Master, my ass. Which by the way, he wouldn’t be able to get even if he tried.” The spider said.

The two then began laughing together before they both sighed, ironically in unison.

“Well, guess I should bring ya inside!” The spider said. “Maybe Ma and I can help you find wherever you’re goin’. I’m Molly by the way.”

Angel’s eyes bulged and he whipped his head towards her. “…Molly?”

“Yeah! Cute name, right?” Molly asked. “A lotta guys and gals think so- Hey, you okay?”

Angel stared at Molly for the longest time and for a moment, he could see the face of his twin. What she looked like when she was alive.

“Hello?” Molly asked.

“…it’s you…” Angel breathed. “H-how did I not see it sooner?”

Molly tilted her head. “Whaddya mean…?”

“…Angel Dust.” He said/introduced.

Molly’s eyes widened. “Whew. Haven’t heard that in a while…my brother went crazy over that-“

And then, she was deathly silent before looking at Angel again. She stared before she slowly covered her mouth. “…Tony?”

Angel slowly walked closer as tears began to well up in his eyes. “Hey, sis…”

Molly pulled Angel into a hug immediately, beginning to cry and laugh at the same time. “TONY!!!”

Angel grinned wide and hugged his twin back with all four of his arms. “Y-you’re here!!!”

“Me!? You’re here!!!” Molly cried as she spun her twin around. “Tony, look at you!!! You look good- is that a gold tooth?!”

Angel blinked and laughed sheepishly. “Long story…”

“Oh, who cares!?” Molly cried as she hugged him again. “You’re actually here!!! Grandpa said you would and then when Dad told us?! Ohhh, we were practically waiting!!! And you sentimental jerk, you made Ma cry with that apology ya sent!”

Angel’s eyes then softened. “…Moll, I’m…I’m really sorry about that-“

“Don’t say another word.” Molly said to her twin. “Was it crummy? Hell yes. Was I more concerned about you than my money? Also hell yes! Did you learn your lesson? Well…you kinda frickin’ died from it.”

Angel couldn’t help but laugh a bit. “…I’ve actually been clean for about 4 months…almost 5.”

“Tony!!! Look at you!!!” Molly squealed. “Oh, Ma is gonna be so happy!!! Pa too!!!”

Angel’s eyes then widened. “Wait, wait, wait…Pops is up here? Molly, Pops is in Hell last I checked. Cause he’s still…y’know-“

“The sick love child of Spider-Man and The Godfather, yeah.” Molly sighed. “About that though, uhhh…Ma remarried.”

Angel’s eyes only seemed to widen even further. “Say what now.”

“Yeah! He’s super sweet to Ma, dated her for about 3 years, and then married her for another 3! Even adopted me.” Molly smiled. “Honestly…kinda wish he was our real dad from the start.”

Angel blinked. “Well…if you say he’s good for Ma…guess I should meet him.”

“And see Ma again!” Molly added as she dragged her brother inside.

And the house was just as nice as the outside. It only had a few pieces of modern technology such as the TV, but the rest of it was very reminiscent of the late 40’s. And there was the sound of humming from the kitchen.

“Ma!!! Ma!!!” Molly cried. “You won’t believe who just showed up!!!”

The voice laughed before another spider woman walked in. She had long white hair that matched her fluff perfectly and four arms much like Angel. Although instead of pink being her secondary color, it was purple. She was even wearing a purple blouse and skirt.

“Who is it, honey?” The woman asked before her eyes widened and she dropped the scrubber she was holding.

Molly grinned wide. “It’s Anthony!!! Grandpa brought him from Hell cause he’s being redeemed!!! Like on TV!!!”

Angel and Molly’s mother, Annabelle, did not speak.

Angel felt his heart skip a beat in fear at the silence. He then slowly walked forward. “U-uhh…hey, Ma…”

And then…there were sniffles…

Annabelle covered her mouth before she dashed over and pulled her son into a tight hug as she began to sob. “Il mio dolce bambino…”

Angel…couldn’t help but break as he was held by his mother like he was a little boy all over again. He wrapped all four of his arms tightly around her as he began to cry into her shoulder. “M-Mama…”

Molly quickly joined the hug, far too happy to start crying like her mother and brother.

The family of spiders hugged for what felt like forever before Annabelle let go and wiped away her own tears and Angel’s. “My baby’s finally here…oh, look at how much you’ve grown…”

Angel sniffled. “M-Ma…I-I am so sorry for leeching off of ya…f-for being a f*ckin’ terrible son…I-“

Annabelle rested her forehead against his. “Don’t you dare apologize, baby…it’s in the past…just let your mother cry a little more…”

Angel nodded as he hugged her again. “O-okay…”

Molly then wiped her eyes. “C-crud, now I’m cryin’ too…thanks, Tony.”

“You’re welcome…” Angel said with a laugh.

After just a bit more, they all finally calmed down and Annabelle let go of her son. “You’re finally here…just like he said you’d be…”

Angel’s eyes softened. “O-only for three days. I ain’t fully redeemed yet…”

“I’ve waited decades. What’s a few more months?” Annabelle smiled, nuzzling both of her children. “…and your brother?”

“I…I dunno. He doesn’t seem like the kinda guy to change…”

Molly scoffed. “Typical of that asshole…”

“Baby, he is still your brother.” Annabelle said. “And while your deadbeat sperm donor deserves to be down there, your brother may have a chance. I know there’s some good in him…”

Angel smiled. “I-if you say so…by the way…Molly said we got a new Dad?”

Annabelle’s eyes lit up. “Oh, yes, yes! You’ll love him!!! Sweetheart!!! Come down for a second!!!”

The voice, who sounded almost exactly like Lucifer, called back. “Coming, coming!!!”

Molly snorted.

“I heard that, Molly!” The voice laughed before sure enough, the identical twin of Lucifer and right hand to God himself walked down.

Michael Morningstar.

“Who is-“ Michael’s eyes then widened. “Oh!”

Angel’s jaw dropped.

“Mikey? This is my son, Anthony. The one your father told you about.” Annabelle smiled. “And Anthony? This is my husband, Michael.”

“…holy sh*t…” Angel said. “Literally…”

Michael blinked. “I think he knows who I am…let me guess. You’re familiar with my brother, Lucifer?”

“…I mean…yeah!” Angel cried. “Ya look just like him! If I was stupid, I’d think he married my Ma to f*ck with me!”

“Anthony!” Annabelle cried.

Angel sighed. “S-sorry, sorry. That’s…that’s rude. Uhh…nice to meet ya.”

Michael went over and shook his hand, even though he had to look up at Angel due to him being the exact same height as Lucifer. “Nice to meet you too, Anthony.”

Later, lunchtime came. Angel’s mouth was practically watering since he hadn’t had his mom’s cooking in decades .

“Alright, I’m gonna make us something.” Annabelle smiled. “Molly, could you help your mom out?”

“Sure, Ma!” Molly said as she stood from her chair, well aware that they were leaving Angel and Michael alone to let them get to know each other.

Annabelle kissed Michael’s cheek. “Te la caverai alla grande, amore mio.”

“Non eccezionale quanto te.” Michael said as he nuzzled her, watching her leave.

Angel blinked. “…so, ya know Italian too?”

“I’m fluent in all of Earth’s languages. It’s part of my job- err… former job.” Michael said. “When Father went on vacation, it was my job to take his place…but, uhh, that was easier said than done. I am not all-seeing like he is so the Exterminations slipped right by me.”

Angel sighed. “Good to know even Heaven’s politics can get corrupt…”

“Boy, do they ever…” Michael sighed. “I get a headache just thinking about it…”

Angel nodded before he looked at him. “So…you married my Ma.”

Michael nodded. “For 3 years. Our anniversary is coming up.”

“You treating her right?” Angel asked.

“Like she is someone to worship.” Michael said. “Which she is. Your mother is a lovely lady. She helped me out when we first met just because she wanted to, no matter how much I insisted she should relax.”

Angel nodded. “Okay, okay…did you f*ck my mother?”

Surprisingly, Michael didn’t even flinch at the mention of sex. “More like the other way around, but after our wedding and once or twice before, yes.”

“Somewhat traumatized at the mental image of that, but why’d you treat that like a normal question?”

“Why’d you ask it like a normal question?” Michael asked.

Angel blinked. “…okay, fair enough.”

“Your mother and sister joke about it so much that I’ve just…fallen into the pit with them.” Michael chuckled.

Angel nodded. “Yup, uhh…sounds like them.”

Michael then gave him a sincere and gentle look. “…I know that your mother and sister want us to get along, and I want to get along with you too, Anthony. From what I’ve heard, you’re a good person who just needs some guidance…and it seems like you’re getting that guidance from my niece, Charlie.”

Angel nodded again. “Yeah, uhh…she’s been a big help.”

“But just because I’m your new step-dad doesn’t mean you have to call me Dad or anything like that.” Michael said. “I know your actual father wasn’t…well-“

“He was a piece of sh*t who traumatized me at a very young age because he made me and my family watch him drown a rival.”

“Yup. If Father allowed it, I’d go down there myself and stab him into oblivion.” Michael said casually. “But you understand what I mean. I’m not going to force you to call me anything you don’t want. You can call me Michael or anything you want.”

Angel sighed. “…you treat Ma right and Molly says you adopted her after your wedding, so…guess you’re a pretty big step up from Pops. And you ain’t a mob boss, are ya?”

Michael snorted. “I may be the Angel of War, but that doesn’t mean I like war. It just means I’m the one fighting in them.”

“Like with your brother? He really hates you by the way.”

Michael’s eyes narrowed. “Yup. Past millennia was proof of that.”

“…do ya hate him?”

“No.” Michael said. “Can he be annoying? Absolutely. Am I angry that he introduced evil into the world? Yes, a little bit. But it wasn’t entirely his fault. Am I confused as to why he left his family for Lilith? I was once, but not anymore.”

Eventually, Annabelle and Molly came back with lunch, setting it across the table.

Angel’s eyes sparkled . “This is literally Heaven…”

But as they were about to eat, a large and familiar portal opened up…and out walked the Morningstar Family, Jesus, and Vaggie.

And well. You know the rest.

Chapter 29: Episode 29: Michael

Chapter Text

“So. Yeah. That’s what happened.” Angel said. “And I’m only now kinda realizing this makes me The Big G’s grandson…”

Charlie’s eyes sparkled and she hugged Angel tightly. “COUSIN!!!!”

Molly then hugged Charlie in return. “Cousin!!!”

“It has appeared that we have interrupted your meal. Apologies.” J said with a bow of his head.

Annabelle giggled. “Oh, it’s not a problem! Although…now I think I should’ve cooked something bigger for all of you.”

“No need, sister in law.” Uriel said. “We merely only came to introduce Charlie and Vaggie to Michael and then we’ll be on our way.”

Vaggie then looked at Lucifer and then at Michael. Both of them were staring each other down, with Lucifer looking rather malicious and Michael looking… ashamed?

Charlie then hugged her new cousins one last time before going over to Annabelle. “And you must be Angel’s mom!!! I’m his friend, Charlie!”

“And my new niece!” Annabelle giggled. “It’s my honor to meet you! Thank you so much for taking care of my boy down there…”

Angel chuckled. “Yeah…not sure where I’d be right now if it weren’t for her.”

“Awwwwwwwww!!!” Charlie squealed.

Molly giggled. “Dang, bro! You’re sentimental today!”

“I’m a man of many talents.” Angel said before turning to the others. “And I take it you’re the rest of God’s kids? Sup, Jesus.”

“‘Sup’ to you as well, Anthony.” J said.

Angel then looked at Lucifer. “No offense, but how’d ya handle so many siblings?”

Lucifer gritted his teeth. “I didn’t. He kicked me out.”

“…you mean they?”

Lucifer pointed at Michael. “I know what I said.”

Michael sighed. “Luci-“

“Don’t! Just…just go meet your niece.” Lucifer sighed.

And sure enough, despite the clear brotherly drama, Charlie walked over to Michael. “Hi, Uncle Michael!!! Wow, you really do have my dad’s face!”

Michael smiled at the innocence he could sense in his niece and he chuckled. “We used to look exactly the same, but Father insisted on having us change the little things just so he could tell us apart. My hair, his cheeks and whatnot.”

‘They even sound the same…’ Vaggie thought.

“Well! It’s still super nice to meet you!!!” Charlie smiled, shaking his hand.

Michael couldn’t help but grin as he shook back. “How has Heaven been for you all?”

“Fantastic!!!” Charlie smiled. “But big! It’s almost impossible to get a map of it all!”

Jophiel stepped in. “Actually, there is a map! It just keeps changing since…Gabriel?”

Gabriel, realizing he would have to socialize, cleared his throat. “Y-you see, since Dad knew that one day Heaven was gonna become crowded, he kinda made it…infinite. So we wouldn’t ever suffer overpopulation. So, there are places around here that don’t have anybody yet.”

Lucifer sighed. “And yet, he created Hell to not be that way at all…”

“To be fair, I don’t think he was giving it much thought.” Camael hummed.

Lucifer turned. “Gee, sis. Way to remind me about how sh*tty the kingdom I rule over is.”

Camael’s eyes widened. “Crud, I didn’t mean-!”

“Dad!” Charlie cried. “C’mon, you know it’s not that bad!”

Lucifer turned to his daughter. “Charlie. Sweetie. My entire universe. I am well aware that not all of the Sinners are completely bad. Hell, look at Angel and that Pentious friend of yours! They’re good people and there is most definitely, without a doubt, more like them…but you can’t deny that the majority of it still sucks. Like, even the Hellborn are kinda awful. It definitely sucks less now…but still.”

Vaggie turned. “He’s, uhh, got a point.”

Charlie blinked before sighing. “Okay, fair enough. Hell isn’t the greatest place…but that’s what the hotel is for! To change it!”

Lucifer smiled. “Exactly.”

“It’s something to be proud of, Charlie.” Michael smiled.

“Hey! No praising my daughter when I am!” Lucifer growled.

Michael sighed and stepped forward. “Okay! How about we just get this out of the way then, Lucifer?”

Azrael gulped. “Oh no…”

Raphael just smirked a bit. “Well, this should be interesting…”

Jophiel stepped forward between her brothers. “Ummm! Lucifer! Michael! Maybe it’s best we don’t fight in front of our families?”

Michael then looked at his wife, his daughter, and now his new step-son. He then sighed. “You’re right. Sorry, Jophy. I’ll be the better man and admit my mistakes. So…I’m sor-“

“Better man!?!” Lucifer growled.

Camael then pulled Vaggie, Charlie, and Jophiel away from the scene. “Too late. It’s already gone nuclear.”

Charlie slowly faced her aunt. “So…what do we do?”

“It’s like a jukebox. You have to let the whole song play out…” Gabriel said, already thinking to hide himself under the table.

Lucifer scoffed. “Oh, please! Anything you can do, I can do better!”

Michael turned his head. “What?”

Lucifer then stepped towards his twin, suddenly beginning to sing. “~I can do anything better than you!~”

“No, you can’t.”

“~Yes, I can!~”

Michael then began singing as well, unsurprisingly sounding just like his brother. “~No, you can’t!~”

“~Yes, I can!~”

“~No, you can’t!~”

“~Yes, I can! Yes, I can!~” Lucifer boomed, spreading his wings in triumph.

Michael rolled his eyes before stepping forward. “~Anything you can be, I can be greater! Sooner or later, I’m greater than you!~”

Lucifer growled. “~No, you’re not!~”

“~Yes, I am!~”

“~No, you’re not!~”

“~Yes, I am!~”

“~No, you’re not!~”

Michael grinned cheekily as his own wings spread, lifting him into the air as the sun shined on him like a spotlight. “~Yes, I am! Yes, I ammm! I can shoot a partridge with a single cartridge!~”

Lucifer then summoned a golden bow and arrow and shot down a sparrow he conjured up. “~I can shoot a sparrow with this bow and arrow!~”

Michael smirked and then summoned a plate of cheese right into his hands. “~I can live on bread and cheese!~”

“And only on that?” Lucifer asked.

Michael laughed. “Yup!”

“So can a rat.” Lucifer said with a smug grin.

Michael’s eye twitched and he tossed the plate aside. “~Any note you can sing, I can sing higher!~”

“~I can sing any note higher than you!~” Lucifer snarled.

“~No, you can’t!~”

“~Yes, I can!!!~”

“~NO, YOU CAN’T!!!~”

“~YES, I CAN!!!~”

“~NO, YOU CAN’T!!!~”

“~YES, I CAN!!!~”

“~NO, YOU CAAAAN’T!!!~”

Lucifer took a deep breath. “~YES, I… CAAAAAAAAAAN!!!~”

And sure enough, all of the windows in the house shattered.

Annabelle rubbed her eyes before she sighed. “I’m going to need to fix that…”

“It’s going to get worse.” Uriel hummed.

Michael scoffed at his brother, having to calm himself down for a moment. “~…any note you can sing, I sing softer~”

Lucifer grinned. “~I can sing any note softer than you!~”

“~No, you can’t~”

“~Yes, I can~”

“~no, you can’t~”

“~yes, I can~”

Michael then slowly shook his head, barely even whispering. “~no, you can’t~”

Lucifer’s eye twitched. “~yes, I can! YES, I CAN!!!~”

Michael then swiped a bottle of wine into his hand, pouring himself a cup. “~I drink my liquor faster than a flicker!~”

Lucifer had just chugged another bottle of it down. “~I can drink it quicker! And get even sicker-“

He then fell to his knees and vomited, holding his stomach. Yet, the music made it sound more whimsical than disgusting.

Michael stepped back. “~I can open any safe~”

“Without being caught?” Lucifer coughed.

Michael nodded. “Yes.”

“That’s what I thought, you crook.” Lucifer sneered.

Michael gasped dramatically for a moment before he gritted his teeth. “~Any note you can hold, I can hold longer!~”

Lucifer stood up, regaining his composure and even tossing his tophat aside, which landed right on Vaggie’s head. “~I can hold any note longer than you!~”

“~No, you can’t!~”

“~Yes, I can!~”

“~No, you can’t!~”

“~Yes, I can!~”

“~No, you caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan’t!!!~” Michael sang.

Lucifer inhaled as much air as he could before stomping the ground. “~YES, I CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-“

Michael blinked. “L-Luci, I get it-“

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-“

Angel’s eyes widened. “H-he’s still going!”

“Dad, breathe!!!” Charlie exclaimed.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-“

Lucifer then gasped, falling to his knees and taking deep breaths.

Michael blinked. “~U-uhh…yes, you caaaaaannnn!~”

He then walked over. “Lucifer, what the hell?”

“YOU…SUCK…” Lucifer gasped, slowly getting to his feet again.

Michael then hummed, trying to think of something he could best his twin at. He then smirked. “~Anything you can say, I can say faster!~”

Lucifer grinned. “~I can say anything faster than you!!!~”

“~No,youcan’t~”

“~Yes,Ican~”

“~Noyoucan’t~”

“~YesIcan~”

The two then started singing absolute gibberish at super speed before they finally gave up.

Michael stood back. “~I can jump a hurdle!~”

“~I can wear a girdle!~”

“~I can knit a sweater!~”

“~I can knit it better! ~”

Michael then appeared in a massive spotlight, his wings once again taking him into the air as he shined with holy light. “~I can do most anything!!!~”

Lucifer was in the kitchen, wearing an apron and oven mitts. “Can you bake a pie?”

Michael’s eyes softened. “N-no…”

Lucifer then took out a flaming pie from the oven. “Neither can I…”

Michael sighed, rolling his eyes again before he noticed his wife and then smirked as he landed again. “~Any note you can sing, I can sing sweeter!~”

Lucifer laughed. “~I can sing any note sweeter than you!~”

Michael then gently held his wife’s hand and twirled her around before dipping her while looking into her eyes with the most loving gaze. “~Nooo, you caaaan’t~”

Annabelle’s face went red at his tone and she couldn’t even say anything back.

Angel quickly had to cover his eyes since…well, that was his mom.

Lucifer then finally had the spotlight on him as literal birds started flying around him as he sang. “~Yesss, I caaaan~”

Michael pulled his wife back up and kissed her cheek before gently sitting her down again. “~Nooo, you caaan’t~”

Lucifer smirked as he held out a finger, with one of the birds landing on it. “~Yesss, I caaaaan!~”

Michael stepped over. “~Nooo, you can’t!~”

“~Yesss, I can!~”

“~Nooo, you can’t!~”

“~Ohhh, yes I can!~”

Michael huffed, clenching his fists. “~NO, YOU CAN’T. CAN’T. CAN’T~”

Lucifer growled. “~YES, I CAN. CAN. CAN!!!~”

The two then spread their wings together and stared each other down as the music played the final note. “~YES, I CAAAAAN/NO, YOU CAAAAAN’T!!!~”

Then, there was the sound of clapping. The Morningstar Twins and everyone else immediately turned towards it.

And sure enough, it was Jophiel clapping. She then looked at her family. “…what? I thought it was good!”

Charlie then stepped forward. “Umm…clearly there is some tension between you two! How about you two just…take a breather?”

Michael and Lucifer stared each other down before they sighed. “Fine.”

“I’m going to relax so much better than you…” Lucifer scoffed as he and his twin walked away from each other.

Charlie sighed, rubbing her forehead. “I wonder if Grandpa can give them therapy too…”

Chapter 30: Episode 30: The Morningstar Twins

Chapter Text

Lucifer was sitting in a separate room of Michael’s house, staring down a photo of him and his family.

Specifically of him and Annabelle’s wedding day…he looked so happy.

Lucifer’s eyes softened at that, almost wishing he and Lilith would have attended for a moment…but then an all too familiar memory came back.

The entirety of Heaven surrounding him and his beloved, with Lucifer looking ready to fight and his ‘twin’ charging at him with a flaming holy sword.

“…stupid brother…” Lucifer grumbled, standing up. “Ugh, what am I doing? I’m a grown man.”

And then, there was a knock on the door.

“Lucifer?”

It was Michael.

Lucifer’s eyes widened and his first instinct was to jump right out the window, but a hand stopped him.

“Lucifer, please.”

Lucifer yelped and sure enough, there was his father. “Dad?!”

“Hello, son.” GM smiled. “How’s the family reunion going?”

“…uhh…great?”

GM hummed. “So great that you’re now pouting in your brother’s room like you’re still 10 years old and trying to escape?”

Lucifer smiled sheepishly. “…yeeeeaaaahhh?”

GM sighed and used his powers to open the door. “No. You two are ruining this for Charlie and I agreed to have you come here so you two can finally squash this feud. I just want my boys to get along for once. Okay?”

Michael bit his bottom lip, and nodded. “Yes, Father.”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed. “Suck-up-“

“SAMAEL.” GM huffed as he set Lucifer down. “I am going to leave this room and make sure Alastor doesn’t randomly eat someone! And you two are at the very least going to act like you’re adults by the end of this conversation! Do you understand?”

Lucifer sighed. “Okay! Okay! Fine! Yes!”

GM nodded and then teleported away, closing the door behind them so the two could have some privacy.

He had the feeling there would be a lot of shouting.

Michael fiddled with his sleeve, unsure how to go about this. He…he had wanted this conversation for so long…but now…

The Angel of War sighed. “...go ahead.”

“Be specific, dear brother. Go ahead with what?” The King of Hell asked, rolling his eyes.

“Beat me up. Scream. Shout. Break something. Whatever…whatever you want, really.”

Lucifer seemed a bit surprised…but he did take his chance and knocked over a vase before looking at him. “What’s your game here? Trying to be the bigger man again? ‘Cause, your life is proof of that enough.”

Michael sighed, his eyes forlorn. “I'm not the bigger man, Luci.”

“Oh, really?” Lucifer grinned. “Look around!!! You’re Dad’s right hand man, you’re still in Heaven , everybody loves you and your perfect hair and all that sh*t! Hell, you even have a wife and a kid!!! Two kids now!!! Meanwhile I’m down in Hell, having only just started to become a decent parent in my kid’s life and OH YEAH! My wife who I loved so dearly clearly realized I wasn’t good enough and left! Probably the best decision she’s ever made in all honesty!!! We may be twins, but our lives couldn’t be more black and white.”

“Lucifer. I don't like being Dad's right hand. I'm done.”

Lucifer laughed. “Sure. Right.”

Michael stared at him. He wasn’t smiling or laughing. There wasn't any sarcasm or amusem*nt in his eyes, either.

And Lucifer’s condescending grin slowly faded away. “…wait, you’re serious?”

“As soon as Dad got back, he told me I was done. And I thank him for it.”

Lucifer stepped forward. “…I don’t believe this. You and I fought for years for that position when I was up here! And you’re… giving it up?”

Michael sighed. “Luci…you don’t get it. Yeah, I fought for that position. I fought like a rabid dog for it…but I lost you. And then I had to be God for 500 years and I realized just how much our father had to do. That’s how Sera was able to slip right by me because I was too stressed to even realize what she was doing. Yet I couldn't give it up because Dad was a wreck and desperately needed that vacation, our siblings already had time-consuming jobs as it was, and everything was just…f*cked up…”

Lucifer then scoffed. “I get that last part. Being King isn’t as fun as it sounds…but I highly doubt you felt sad about losing me. Dad? Oh, him, I get! Cammy and Gabe? Sure! Raph clearly wants to punch me! Jesus hardly knew me! Uri and Azzy have practically thrived without me! Jophy even finally became a sort-of mom like she always wanted! But you? You’re the reason I even got caught in the first place!!! You saw me and Lily, and I begged you not to tell Dad…and then you did!!! And thus, the beginning of the end for me!!! Not to mention, you tried to stab me!!!”

“Lucifer-“

“Oh, just be honest!!! What changed!?!?” Lucifer screamed. “The only times you and I ever liked each other was when we were kids! After that, we were anything but brothers!!! You got favored by Dad, by The Elders, by The Council, by Earth! By everyone!!! Why pretend like you like me now!? Are you just ashamed that you share my face and you wanna feel less bad that you’re brothers with The Devil himself!?! TELL ME, MICHAEL!!! TELL ME!!!”

“HOW HARD IS IT FOR YOU TO BELIEVE THAT I LOVE MY f*ckING BROTHER!?!?!” Michael shrieked. “YOU’RE RIGHT!!! I DID DO ALL THOSE THINGS!!! I WAS THE FAVORITE AND I HATED IT!!! SO, I’M SORRY FOR BEING THE ONE THAT RUINED YOUR LIFE!!!”

Lucifer’s eyes widened and he was left quiet, especially when his brother…began to cry?

Michael pulled at his hair slightly, trying to take deep breaths. “W-when I saw you with Lilith, I was…I-I was scared! I felt like you had torn our entire kingdom apart when I heard you and Lilith mention you were the ones who gave Eve the apple! So, yeah! I told Dad!!! But he was going to find out either way!!!”

He then wiped his eyes with his sleeve. “…b-but that’s no excuse! You’re right, I pulled a sword at you when you started talking back!!! And we fought!!! You somehow managed to win and then Father exiled you!!! But when Lilith fell and you dove in after her? I realized you cared more about her than any of us!!! And you had every reason to!!! We weren’t your family, we were your captors!!! I was wrong!!! I’ve always been wrong and I see that now!!!”

“…Michael…?” Lucifer whispered, staring at his twin as if he was an entirely different person.

Michael then took another deep breath. “I hate being the favorite, Lucifer! I hate all the constant praise even when I make a mistake! For Father’s sake, Annabelle was the first person to actually shout at me for doing something wrong in years!!! I couldn’t be… me around everyone else! I couldn’t even be me around our family because after your fall, our family shattered!!! I had to hold it together while having to fight the guilt that I’m the one responsible for your sh*tty life in Hell!!! I didn’t even try to defend you!!!"

He then began to laugh, almost hysterically. “So go ahead!!! Hate me all you want, brother!!! I deserve it!!! I don’t deserve any of the things that I’m so lucky to have!!! I don’t deserve Annabelle, I don’t deserve Molly, and I sure as Hell don’t deserve to be in Heaven!!!”

He then fell to his knees, finally starting to sob. “…I-I’m the monster…n-not you…”

…but then…

Lucifer suddenly knelt down…and hugged his twin tightly.

Michael’s eyes shot open, despite tears still streaming down his face.

“…guess we really are twins…” Lucifer whispered.

Michael then broke into small cries, clutching his brother as if he was the last lifeline in the universe.

Lucifer closed his eyes, feeling his own tears stream down his face. “…I don’t think either of us is the monster here, bro…we just…make a lot of mistakes…”

Michael sniffled as he managed to get it together just so he could speak. “W-we used t-t-to be so c-close…”

“We were…and maybe we need a lot less hatred…and a lot more forgiveness.” Lucifer whispered.

Lucifer then opened his teary eyes and they widened when he saw the door had opened…and their family was there, likely having heard the whole thing.

Charlie was teary-eyed, trying her best to stay quiet.

Lucifer just slowly smiled and gently urged his daughter to come over.

And Charlie did. She raced over and hugged her father and uncle tightly.

Michael’s eyes widened when he saw his niece with them and even more so when one by one, everyone else joined the hug. His wife, his daughter, his new step-son, and his siblings. Even Vaggie joined.

Michael accepted the hug, even wrapping his wings around them. “…s-so much for a good first impression…”

“Eh…I’ve seen worse.” Angel whispered.

…but the only one who remained away was Raphael.

Raphael’s eyes were soft, however…but he eventually walked away to stay in the kitchen. ‘Why is it so easy for them to forgive you, Samael…when I feel like I shouldn’t…?’

Chapter 31: Episode 31: Crymini

Chapter Text

Husk walked right through the portal before his eyes widened when he was…in the middle of a large crowd.

“The f*ck?” Husk asked, but no one in the crowd could really hear him due to their own excitement.

He looked ahead and saw…a stage. This must’ve been a concert of some kind. He looked around and saw that everyone had 70s style haircuts, wore ripped jeans and occasionally some punk rock makeup. It reminded him of the times before he'd died…

Before he left Minnie behind.

Minnie. That’s who he was here for.

Husk looked at the card that GM had given him and started to move his way through the crowd…before he heard a voice on stage.

“WELCOME, ONE AND ALL!” A familiar voice shouted through a microphone to the crowd. “Who's ready to f*cking rock?!”

The crowd practically screamed , causing Husk to have to cover his ears as he looked on stage…but then he froze .

Up on stage along with two other Winners…was the exact same punk rock wolf that was on the card. The one that his daughter had turned into.

“…Minnie?” Husk breathed.

Minnie Skylar grinned at the crowd, wearing makeup of her own, with blue paint lined down her cheeks to represent tears, and a cute (but unrevealing) purple tank top with ripped black jeans. Her tail swished back and forth as she waved. “Whassup, guys?! I didn’t hear you!!! ARE YOU READY TO ROCK?!”

The crowd screamed even louder, but Husk almost didn’t hear them as he stared right at Minnie on stage.

“Hell yeah, that's what I wanna hear!!! Now…” Minnie's face softened. “I know that a lot of you struggled before you got to Heaven. I did, too. When…when I lost my dad, Henrik Skylar, I was lost. I didn't know what to do because I was just a kid. I had to learn to do things without him…but along the way, I picked up a bad habit of my own. I smoked. I smoked to cope with the anxiety of the unknown…and I became addicted. To the point where I was smoking four packs a day instead of just one. I couldn't function without it…and, well…it cost me everything. At 18 years old, I was diagnosed with lung cancer.”

Husk’s eyes widened in absolute horror at the very idea of that. Especially since he wasn’t there for it. Already, he had been feeling more emotions than usual. Now? They were all on overdrive.

Then, Minnie smiled. “Before that, I didn't understand my old man. I was confused, sad and angry at the stupid stuff he did, but…being a former addict myself, I think I can understand him a little more. So…I wrote a song. This song is called ‘Breaking the Habit.’ I love ya, Dad.”

Husk wanted to practically run on stage and hold his daughter close, but…he couldn’t move.

‘How the f*ck am I going to tell her…?’ He thought as music started to play.

Minnie took a deep breath…then began singing. “~Memories consume, like opening the wound. You're drowning yourself again~”

She then began walking across the stage, her eyes closed as she lost herself in the music.

“~You assume that you're safe in your room, until you pick up your obsession again. I don't want you to be the one the battles choose! ‘Cause inside we realize that we're all confused! We don't know what's worth fighting for, so inside we scream! We don't know why we instigate, so we say things that we don't mean!~”

Minnie then tilted her head back as the music, alongside her own voice, began to rise in volume.

“~Don't know how we got this way, and it's not alright! So we're breaking the habit! We're breaking the habit, tonight!~”

Her voice then grew soft. These words were all too familiar to her. Husk could see the pain on her face.

“~Clutching your ‘cure,’ you tightly lock the door. You forget to breathe because you hurt so much more than any time before, so you feel as if you don't have any options left again…I don't want you to be the one the battles choose, ‘cause inside we realize that we're all confused!~”

Minnie then began screaming into her microphone. “~We don't know what's worth fighting for, so inside we scream! We don't know why we instigate, so we say things that we don't mean! Don't know how we got this way, and it's not alright! So we're breaking the habit! We're breaking the habit, tonight!~”

These words…these words hurt.

Somehow, Husk’s chest grew tighter. Somehow…somehow, he just knew that this was how his daughter had felt about his drinking and gambling, even all of these years later.

“~We're painting it on the walls! ‘Cause this time we're both at fault! You don't have to fight alone! I wish I'd known how this would end! We don't know what's worth fighting for, so inside we scream! But now I have the clarity to show you what I mean! We don't know how we got this way, and we wanna be alright! So we're breaking the habit tonight!!! WE'RE BREAKING THE HABIT TOGETHER! TONIGHT!!!!!!!!~”

And then, the crowd erupted into a fit of cheers and screams of absolute joy and excitement, while Husk was the only one who remained completely still.

Minnie took a deep breath, and a wide smile grew on her face…but Husk could see it.

Her hands were shaking.

“Thank you, thank you! You’re all amazing! I'll be right back, so keep hyping sh*t up, beautiful people!!!”

And then, she walked off and Husk started trying to shove his way through…before a lightbulb practically smashed itself right onto his head.

He then looked behind him. “…right. Wings.”

They then spread and he took off into the air, trying to sneak his way backstage since it was obvious security wouldn’t believe him about who he was or who brought him to Heaven in the first place.

“Yo, Mins, you okay?” A bandmate asked. “That song was a banger, but…your dad…”

Minnie sighed, running her hands through her pink hair. “I'm fine, Alana.”

The other one walked over. “You sure? Your hands are shaking…”

Minnie stuffed them into her pockets. “I'll be okay. Don't worry.”

She then walked backstage to her dressing room, having to shut the door behind her so her bandmates wouldn’t worry about her.

Minnie took a deep breath, and she looked around her room.

A poster was tacked onto the wall next to her mirror: ‘Crymini's Fallen Angels.’

Crymini. The name she had chosen for whenever she was on stage.

And, tacked onto her mirror…was a picture of her and her father, when they both had been alive. She was so grateful to have this picture, because there wasn't much of anything else.

But then, she heard some kind of thud noise from outside.

“Whoa! Who the hell are you!?” One of her bandmates cried. “Cool wings by the way!”

“Where’s Mouse- f*ck! I mean Minnie!”

“A bit concerning how you know her real name, not gonna lie. Who even are you!?”

…Mouse?

Minnie's eyes widened and she stood up. “N…no way…”

She rushed outside and then, there were her bandmates in front of Husk.

“Look, it’s…it’s a long story.” Husk said. “I just need to see Minnie. It’s kind of the whole reason I’m even in Heaven.”

“In…Heaven? As in, you haven’t always been here?”

“Look, man, I don’t know-”

Husk then sighed. “Why the f*ck did I think this would be easy? Look. Henrik Skylar. The name sound familiar?”

Minnie's eyes widened and she stepped forward.

“...Daddy?”

Husk’s eyes widened and he pushed the two other band members to the side once he heard his daughter’s voice. “Minnie…?”

Minnie's eyes widened as she stared at him…and then she began tearing up, tears beginning to spill down her cheeks.

Husk slowly stepped forward before he eventually took out the card that GM had given him once again, showing it to her. “…looks like you did alright without your old man for a while…”

Minnie didn't hesitate.

She bolted over to her father. “DAD!!!!!!”

Husk quickly embraced his daughter, shutting his own tearful eyes as he held her tight, as if she was about to disappear right in his arms.

Minnie was a mess, instinctively burying her face into his shoulder, crying loudly, not caring if her makeup was ruined.

Her dad was here.

Husk’s wings even wrapped around her and he kissed her forehead and stroked her hair. “Shhh…shhh…”

“Y…y-you're here…! Y-you’re really here!!!”

Husk nodded before he smiled wide, looking at his daughter’s face and wiping away her tears with his thumb. “Y-you aren’t gonna believe how…oh, look at how tall you are already…”

Minnie giggled, blinking back tears. “I've been the same height forever, silly…”

“I’m seeing a few centimeters, what are you talking about…?” Husk said with a laugh. “I heard that song…it was amazing, kiddo…”

Minnie's eyes lit up. “Really…?”

Husk nodded with a smile. “Way to call us both out…but by the literal God who brought me here, I am so sorry. I didn’t want you to have to raise yourself, but I just couldn’t put down that f*cking bottle and I pissed off the wrong person in a game…I didn’t want you to end up like I did.”

Minnie sighed. “I-I mean…I can understand how hard it is to stop…I-I got really addicted to smoking after you passed away…four packs a day…for two years straight…”

“…but now look at you.” Husk smiled. “You’re in Heaven of all f*cking places and you’ve got a whole-ass crowd screaming for you. I couldn’t be more proud of you, Mouse…”

Minnie giggled. “Daaaaad…I’m not a Disney character!”

Husk grinned smugly. “Let’s see…you’re a furry now, you’re wearing pink, you sing-“

“Because it's my job! You’re a furry too, Garfield!”

Husk smirked and then wrapped his arm around her and began giving her a noogie. “Garfield, eh!? I’ll teach you!!!”

“Aaah, no!” Minnie laughed, playfully biting his arm. “Jerk!!!”

Husk just cackled to himself, happy to be able to do things like this with his daughter again…even if he wouldn’t be able to stay for much longer.

“Min?” One of her bandmates said suddenly. “We gotta go back out. Super sorry to interrupt!”

Husk eventually let his daughter go. “Rock the world, kid.”

Minnie beamed. “We have another concert the day after tomorrow. I'd love it if you could come.”

“You kidding? I’m not missing it for all the booze in the universe.” Husk grinned. “Besides. I have to make my time up here count. Play your heart out, alright?”

Minnie smirked. “You can bet that I will.”

Husk then watched her and her band run back out on stage and he watched with a proud smile.

And how could he not be?

Chapter 32: Episode 32: Cherrisnake

Chapter Text

Cherri honestly didn’t have anyone to really reunite with. She honestly didn’t think her parents wanted to see her and if they did, then she’d apologize. But, that was a time for another day.

Was that a sign that she had more to work on in order to get redeemed? Probably.

But in the meantime, she was much more curious about what Pentious had meant earlier…and now…

Pentious let out a maniacal cackle as he held a paint-covered rifle close to his chest, taking cover behind a wall. “Face it, my dear!!! In thisss battlefield, you are outmatched!”

Cherri cackled, holding her own paintball rifle. “We'll see about that, old man!!!”

Pentious then peeked behind the wall, aiming his rifle as he slowly and quietly slithered out. And when he heard footsteps, he whipped around and began firing.

Multiple colors of paint splattered across the once blank walls. If one was colorblind, they would probably assume its red and they had just witnessed someone’s brains being blown out.

But, to Pentious’ surprise, Cherri had used a recording of footsteps from her phone, and then the cyclops appeared, blasting at him with pink paint while laughing maniacally. “EAT THIS!!!!!”

Pentious was hit in the back with the various paintballs and he collapsed, dropping his paint rifle. “I YIELD, I YIELD!!!”

Cherri giggled, covered in various paints herself as she went over and held out her hand towards him. “Good game, though!!! That was a lot of fun!”

Pentious laughed as he took her hand. “And thank you… FOR LETTING YOUR GUARD DOWN! SSSURPRISE!”

He then took out a paint pistol and shot her in return, covering her stomach with golden paint.

Cherri's eye widened in surprise, then she grinned. “Ooohhh, you're so gonna get it!!!! C'mere!!!!”

Pentious laughed and quickly slithered away as the chaos continued.

They had spent nearly 3 hours in the paintball arena before the angels running it used magic to clean them and the arena itself of all the paint.

“It’sss a shame they had to clean it all up so fassst.” Pentious said. “I noticed you were usssing your gun to actually try and paint an art piece on the wallsss! I never knew you wanted to be an artist!”

Cherri giggled. “Well…I was always pretty creative, I guess. It's just that, well…I was really interested in fireworks, and how I could make those pictures using fireworks in the sky, y’know? But…I also got a love for the thrills. Creativity and a love for the sh*t that goes boom is…not a good combination.”

Pentious hummed. “No, I sssuppose it isn’t. I mussst admit, I understand what you mean. Back when I was alive, I alwaysss had ideas for contraptions that weren’t exactly…morally correct. Ssso, I think I had a desire for the thrill as well.”

Cherri looked at him softly. “Yeah, but…that doesn't explain how you ended up in Hell. I mean! You're sweet! Kind! You are honestly the sweetest f*ckin’ person I met there! I don’t understand how someone as sweet as you ended up in such a bad place...”

Pentious’ cheeks reddened at all the compliments before his own eyes softened. “Well, ummm…let’sss jussst say-“

He then looked at his watch and his eyes widened. “Oh! I have to drop off Arthur! Ssssh*t, I forgot!!!”

Cherri's eye widened. “Wait…Arthur?”

Pentious turned towards her. “I sssuppose I never did tell you about my son!”

Cherri's eye bulged. “...YOUR REACTION TO ANGEL’S DADDY JOKE MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW…”

“He had me fooled for a moment.” Pentious admitted before he pulled out a golden crystal and tapped it, creating a portal to a large playground.

He then took Cherri’s hand and pulled her right through. “I apologize for thisss, my dear! We can jussst drop him off at his mother’sss and then we can continue our date! And you need to meet him anyway considering the ‘OH MY GOD’ look on your face!”

Then, GM poked his head through a portal. “You rang?”

“Oh! Sssorry!” Pentious said sheepishly.

GM chuckled. “‘No worries’ as you kids say!” He said before disappearing once again.

“Pen…” Cherri said nervously. “Please tell me I'm not a homewrecker. I-I know that it’s probably been years and I’ve had more than one boyfriend, but-”

Pentious’ eyes widened and he held her hands. “N-no, no, no! You’re nothing like that! It’sss…complicated to explain, but I can promissse that you aren’t breaking anything. But I’ll explain after we drop him off. Hisss mother may be a little worried by now…”

And then, a familiar voice cried out. “Papa!!!”

Pentious turned and his eyes lit up as an amphibian Winner who looked a lot like him ran over. He slithered over and scooped the young boy into his arms. “Arthur!!! There you are!!! Did you have fun?”

“Uh-huh! Miss Jophiel put me in charge for a while!!!” Arthur said with a nod.

“Not sssurprising. You’re very resssponsible!” Pentious smiled.

Arthur then noticed Cherri and gasped. “Papa? Who’s that?”

Pentious smiled. “Remember that, err, close friend I told you about? In Hell?”

“…Apple Bomb?” Arthur asked, tilting his head.

Cherri's heart melted, and she giggled. “Close, little man! I'm Cherri. It's so good to meet you!”

“Ohhh! It’s good to meet you too!!!” Arthur smiled. “You have one eye! That’s super cool!”

Pentious laughed. “Yesss, it is. Now, let’s get you to your mother, hmm?”

“Okay!” Arthur said with the brightest smile he could muster.

Cherri squealed a little. “Oh my gosh, that is so cuuute…!”

“He isss adorable.” Pentious smiled, booping his son’s nose.

Arthur giggled. “Papaaa!!!”

Pentious then took out the golden crystal again, summoning a portal to a house that looked to be straight out of the Victorian Era AKA when he was still alive.

They walked through and Pentious slithered up to the door with Arthur still in his arms and then rang the doorbell.

A few moments later, the door opened, revealing a reptilian Winner woman wearing a beautiful Victorian Era esque dress, with her long blonde hair tied up in a ponytail, and a hat on her head. She sighed in relief upon seeing the two. “There you two are! Edward, what am I going to do with you?” She asked playfully.

Pentious laughed sheepishly. “Sssorry, Victoria. I got dissstracted.”

“Hi, Mama!!!” Arthur smiled as he leapt out of his father’s arms and into a hug with his mother.

“Hello, my hoppy little frog!” Victoria cooed, nuzzling him. Then she noticed Cherri, and giggled. “Edward, I take it this is the girl you've been swooning over?”

Pentious blushed, but dragged over the clearly nervous Cherri. “Yesss! This is Cherri Bomb! The Heavenly Father hasss brought her and the ressst of my friends over for a visit! She and I were preoccupied with paintball.”

Cherri giggled nervously, and very awkwardly did a curtsy. “Ummm, hello…?”

Victoria laughed. “Oh, there's no need for that, Miss Bomb! I'm happy to meet you!”

“R-really…?”

“Of course! After all, you make Edward so happy!”

Pentious smiled. “She doesss…”

Arthur then gasped. “Papa! You said she was a close friend! Not your girlfriend!”

“W-well, Arthur-“

“That means I have two moms!!!” Arthur cheered.

Cherri's cheeks turned red as Victoria began giggling. “W-wait a minute-”

“Mom 1!” Arthur said, poking Victoria’s cheek and then pointing at Cherri. “And Mom 2!”

Cherri’s face turned redder, and Victoria laughed. “Edward, if you don't mind, how about you two join us for dinner?”

“S-soundsss lovely.” Pentious smiled, but noticed it was still the afternoon. “We’ll sssee you then! I’ll even bring my Egg Boiz!”

“Bye-bye, Papa! Bye-bye, Mom 2!” Arthur said with a wave.

“S-see you guys later!” Cherri said, waving as the two then left.

Pentious then looked at Cherri. “You did very well, my dear!”

Cherri gulped. “Think so?”

Pentious held her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “I know ssso. But you are probably confused about my family’s situation with me, yesss?”

“Y-yeah, I…I’m kinda surprised that Victoria wasn't pissed at me for dating you.”

“Well, I sssuppose I should start off by saying that while she wasss my wife…we weren’t exactly in love . In fact, our marriage was arranged. We had no choice in the matter.” He huffed. “My father simply told me: ‘You get along well with her, so I’m marrying you off’ and then bid me farewell. The assshole.”

Cherri's eye immediately narrowed. “The dick wad…”

“Exactly!” Pentious cried. “Victoria and I were besst friends however, and we tried to make the mossst of it. On our ‘honeymoon’, we flat out told each other how we truly felt. But, we would have to act like we loved each other whenever in public. But then, one day, we…sssort of got drunk and Victoria got pregnant. Thingsss…got complicated after that. Arthur was born and we tried our best to raissse him…”

But then his eyes softened. “…but…child labor lawsss…weren’t very…strict back then…Arthur wasss already working at 8, no matter how much either of usss hated it…and then… then he …”

Cherri’s eye widened in horror.

Arthur had been overworked to death.

Without saying a word, she pulled Pentious into a tight hug.

Pentious’ eyes widened and he hugged back, taking a deep breath. “…I snapped after that. I started building every war machine that I had in my head and I killed his murderers… but that did not make it better. I jussst started making excuses to take more lives until my own was taken. And that’s how I landed in Hell…and met you years later.”

“...If I ever see those f*cking assholes in Hell…I'm going to make them bloody suffer…” Cherri snarled.

Pentious chuckled. “Already did. They died a few Exterminationsss ago…”

“Too bad. I would have loved to deglove their hands and feet Mexican cartel style.”

Pentious then kissed her forehead. “I think you’ll be delighted to know they were begging for mercy…but how about we continue our date inssstead of looking back on sssuch horrible memories? Besssidess…it really isss nice to get to speak to you this way.”

Cherri grinned. “Sounds like a plan, baby…actually, I got a question.”

“Hmm?”

“...do you still have two…?”

Pentious tilted his head before he saw that she was looking down specifically and his cheeks reddened. “Ummm…y-yesss?”

“...f*ckin’ jackpot.”

Chapter 33: Episode 33: ...Mother?

Chapter Text

GM, Alastor, and Nifty walked right through their own portal and arrived at a simple house in a rather simple looking neighborhood. Minus the color scheme of Heaven, it looked exactly like one on Earth.

Alastor’s eyes squinted. “It’s far too bright here…where have you taken me?”

GM turned. “You’ll see, Alastor…I’d prepare yourself.”

Alastor chuckled. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were going to kill me right here and now.”

“You’re not worth the effort.” GM said before suddenly stretching his arm in an almost cartoonish manner, grabbing Nifty and holding her up, while taking her knife away. “No stabbing.”

Nifty pouted. “Awwww…”

GM then began walking towards the house and rang the doorbell.

“Who exactly do you want to speak to in a place like this?”

“Oh, it’s not for me…it’s for you.” GM said.

“Coming!” A woman's voice called from the other side. A few moments later, the door opened.

On the other side, was an elderly deer Winner with dark fur and wearing a 1930s esque dress, with a few areas on her body seemingly reflecting dark skin. She had black hair that spilled over her shoulders, and bright brown eyes.

Eyes…that resembled Alastor’s when he'd been alive.

GM smiled wide and tipped his hat. “Lucille.”

Lucille's eyes lit up. “Oh! Hello, GM, dear! It's nice to see you!”

GM chuckled. “GM. Grandpa Morningstar. I’m glad the name is catching on. I’m terribly sorry to bother you, but…there is someone I’d like for you to see.”

Lucille then tilted her head sideways. “...is that someone bookin’ it down the street?”

“No, that would be Nifty.” GM sighed as he began walking after her. “Alastor. Say hello to your mother while I get a leash for Nifty.”

And the moment he stepped to the side, Alastor was revealed. He was frozen like a statue, his smile had shrunk, and he had even dropped his cane right onto the ground.

Lucille's eyes widened and she stared at Alastor in silence. Then…her eyes began watering as she slowly approached him.

Alastor watched her, but his own feet didn’t move. And then, he slowly looked down as his mouth opened. “H…hello…Mother.”

Even the radio effect from his voice had completely vanished.

Lucille approached him, her eyes filled with tears.

“...Al…you look scared, baby…”

“…I…I take it Jehovah delivered my…apologies to you?”

“...He did. But I didn't want to hear it from him.” Lucille said simply. “Remember what I taught you about being a man? ‘A man isn't a man if he can't say ‘sorry’ himself.’”

Alastor slowly looked at her. “It’s…not like I was exactly allowed here back then, but…I…I am sorry , Mother. I…assume you are disappointed in me.”

Lucille chuckled weakly. “I am. But it's not like your victims were innocent, either. But…” Her eyes softened. “Just because I’m disappointed doesn't change the fact that you're still my baby boy, nor does it change the fact that I still love you.”

Alastor’s red eyes suddenly widened and he looked into her eyes for any sign of a lie. “…Mother, I…haven’t exactly been much better in Hell…”

“You protected the Lord's granddaughter and her hotel, son. I know you. You care about her. She's touched your soul like Rosie has.”

“I…suppose that’s not wrong.” Alastor said with a nod.

Lucille's eyes softened. “You’re not unfeeling, Al. You're not okay in the head, but you still have the capability to care. You're not a monster.”

“…I’m not so sure about that, Mother…” Alastor said as he let his mother caress his face.

“Alastor. I wouldn't have let you near me if you were. I would have kicked your ass right here on my lawn if I had thought such things, and you know it.”

Alastor let out a weak chuckle. “You certainly would have, Mother…but even if there is good in me, I don’t think it’s enough to stay here…I’ve given too many souls to her… ”

Lucille's hand froze. “...what are you talking about?”

Alastor took a deep breath and then slowly reached for his neck, and held onto something invisible for a moment.

But then, it appeared…it was a black and red chain with organic red eyes all across it. And it was wrapped tightly around his neck.

Lucille's eyes widened in horror, and she stepped back.

“No…no, no, no, no-”

Alastor nodded slowly as he took his hands off the chain. “…yes…”

Lucille covered her mouth as tears streamed down her face. “Alastor Henderson… what have you done?”

Alastor took a deep breath. “…it was when I was alive. I woke up to a spirit that I thought was The Loa…she offered me knowledge for my… victims… and I took it in exchange for my soul. And then I was sent to Hell and I got to see what she truly was. The Root of All Evil itself.”

Lucille shook, and her knees buckled.

“I warned you,” she whimpered, her voice strangled with tears. “I warned you that messing with voodoo is dangerous, I-I-!”

“I know. I know.” Alastor said with a nod. “…and my enslavement is my punishment…she’s the reason my powers exist at all…”

Lucille didn't say anything for a while. She just sobbed.

Alastor hadn't seen her cry like this since the night he'd killed his own father to prevent him from beating her to death.

So, he slowly stepped forward, reaching out towards her in a meek attempt to comfort her.

“...Promise me.” Lucille whispered suddenly, allowing him to touch her.

Alastor slowly held her hands. “…what is it?”

Lucille looked at him with tears in her eyes. “...I won't ask you to change. I can't force that on you like your father tried to do. But…if you love me at all, Alastor…if Charlotte Morningstar finds a way to free your soul, or if you find a way out yourself… promise me you'll let her help and escape that monster.”

The Radio Demon was silent for a moment…before he slowly nodded.

“…I promise.”

Lucille didn't say anything, and just pulled her son into a tight hug.

And for a moment…Alastor was taken back to when he'd been frightened of the dark as a little boy, and how his mother would hug him until he was able to fall asleep.

Where he would feel… safe. As if he didn’t have to worry about any of the troubles of the world.

And as he slowly wrapped his arms around her again, he felt like that little boy again. He almost forgot that he had chains around him or that he had even come from Hell itself.

GM watched from afar with a small smile. ‘…there’s good in everyone. You just have to choose to embrace it.’

Chapter 34: Episode 34: The Morningstar Family

Chapter Text

The first day of Heaven had been a success. Families had been reunited and relationships were healing or just starting. All in all, it seemed like it was a great idea to bring them all there.

…except Nifty. The Heavenly Father had to get a holy leash. Yes. Specifically a holy one.

And now, the crew of the Hazbin Hotel were staying in various places for the night. Angel was staying at his mom’s, Husk was at his daughter’s for a while before eventually checking in to a nearby motel, Alastor was staying with his own mother alongside Nifty, and after dinner with Victoria and Arthur, Cherri and Sir Pentious went to his house and… err… explored.

Finally, after reuniting with the Morningstar family, Lucifer, Charlie, and Vaggie went to stay at the Archangel Estate. After all, the only other one who lived there was J.

Charlie sighed happily as she laid on the bed. “Today was amazing!!! And emotional!!!”

Vaggie laid down beside her girlfriend with a smile. “Yeah, it was. Didn’t expect your family to like me that much.”

“How could they not!? You’re amazing and pretty and sweet and strong and-!”

“I get it, mi amor. I love you too.” Vaggie said, kissing Charlie on the cheek before pulling the blankets over them.

Charlie quickly began cuddling her, her wings popping out and wrapping around Vaggie.

Vaggie’s eye widened as the feathers and scales touched her exposed skin, having a mix of soft and smooth textures. But, she smiled and relaxed in Charlie’s arms.

“Goodnight, Vaggie.”

“Goodnight, Charlie.”

The next day, Charlie and Vaggie decided to go explore Heaven a bit more. And it was so much nicer to be able to do it without the worry of an upcoming trial or Vaggie fearing what her girlfriend might think of what she really was.

They got breakfast, went out to the zoo, and all kinds of things…until that same afternoon, a golden piece of paper suddenly appeared in Charlie’s hands.

Vaggie hummed. “Hun, what’s that?”

Charlie looked down. “Oh! I, uhh…don’t know.”

She looked at the piece of paper before reading aloud. “Hello there, Charlie! Hope you’re enjoying your second day in Heaven! You and the rest of the family are invited to the Archangel Estate for The Morningstar Family Dinner tonight. Show up around 7 or later if that’s not too much to ask! Love, Grandpa."

“Family dinner, huh?” Vaggie asked. “Well, that’ll be interesting.”

Charlie smiled wide. “Yeah!!! And now that Dad’s on his way to forgiving and or tolerating the rest of his family, it should be great!!!”

“I’ll have to find something to do.” Vaggie said.

Charlie’s eyes widened. “O-oh! Vaggie, if you wanna come, you can-“

“Charlie.” Vaggie laughed. “It’s alright. Besides, I think I gotta practice some more of my soccer skills or try another sport out. This is a family thing and while I love you to the ends of the universe, being away from each other for one day isn’t gonna kill us.”

Charlie then grinned. “Grandpa talked to you?”

“…yeah.” Vaggie said with a laugh. “Said it could be healthy for me to find something outside of you.”

“Well, I do think a sport’s a good place to start!” Charlie smiled before her cheeks reddened slightly. “I certainly love the muscle~”

Vaggie’s face reddened. “C-Charlie!”

Charlie nuzzled her girlfriend. “But alright! We can spend the rest of the day together and then I can go!”

Vaggie nodded and the two walked away.

Later that night, Charlie flew over to the Archangel Estate with a large smile. She then took a deep breath before opening the door. “I’m here!!!”

“Hey, Charlie!” Lucifer waved, sitting beside one of his brothers and his father, who was staring at a TV screen and tapping a button on a video game controller.

GM hummed. “So, how do I get them to move?”

J chuckled. “Move the joystick.”

“…the what?”

“The moving thingy.”

GM looked down and slowly inched his thumb forward against the joystick, and sure enough, the character on screen began moving. He gasped. “Charlie! I’m playing the videogame!”

Charlie gasped as well, going over. “Awesome, Grandpa!!!”

Lucifer blinked. “Dad, you’re walking into a wall.”

“Annnd now you’re getting shot at.” J said before the words ‘YOU DIED’ flashed on screen.

GM blinked with all four of his eyes before smiling. “Isn’t technology nifty?”

“Yup. It’s, uhh, it’s cool.” Lucifer said.

Charlie smiled. “So, what’s for dinner?”

“It’s waiting on the table. Now we’re just waiting for everyone else.” J said.

And sure enough, the doors opened again and everyone came in. Azrael, Raphael, Camael, Gabriel, Uriel, Jophiel, and Michael.

Charlie smiled wide. “Hi, Uncles!!! Hi, Aunts!!!”

“Charlie!!!” Jophiel smiled as she went over and hugged Charlie once again. “Oh, it’s always a pleasure to see you!”

“You saw her yesterday.” Raphael said.

“Oh, hush.” Jophiel scolded.

Uriel titled his head as he walked over. “Father? What are you doing?”

“Being old.” Lucifer said.

“Playing the videogames! Am I ‘hip’ now, son?” GM asked.

J held in a laugh. “Y-yes, Father. Very hip.”

“No, Dad. No, you are not. Cause no one uses the word ‘hip’ anymore.” Camael said, walking over.

GM hummed as he stood up and set down the controller. “I think it’s a fun word. But I thank all of you for coming!”

Lucifer hummed. “Where’s Emily? She’s a Morningstar now!”

“I did invite her, but she was still far too busy.” GM sighed. “But! Let’s eat, shall we?”

“Good, I’m starving.” Azrael said.

The Morningstar Family then all sat down at the table, and Charlie could see…weirdly enough, all kinds of food from various cultures and countries. There was even just a random box of pepperoni pizza near the end.

Raphael was the next to notice. “We have pizza in Heaven?”

Camael took a slice and bit into it. “Yeah, you gotta get out more.”

And one by one, each member of the family started to take pieces of food and put them on their plate. Although, for about a minute…that’s all there was. Eating. It was slightly awkward.

Eventually, GM spoke up. “Isn’t this nice? When is the last time we all got together as a family?”

“A…millennia ago?” Lucifer questioned. “Maybe more? How long has Earth been around?”

Gabriel blinked. “…I…lost count at 3 billion years.”

“Man, I feel old.” Michael commented.

GM grinned. “So, how was everyone’s day? Charlie! How about you start?”

“Oh! Well…Heaven’s honestly been amazing!” Charlie smiled. “Vaggie and I just did some more exploring! I got to hug a koala again!!!”

Lucifer gasped. “Charlie, Charlie, Charlie! Were there ducks?!”

“Mhm!!!”

“YES!!!” Lucifer cried. “THANK YOU, DAD!”

“You’re welcome.” GM chuckled. “But it was actually Michael’s idea.”

Michael’s eyes widened and he smiled sheepishly. “I-I mean-“

“Oh, take credit for it.” Azrael smirked. “Cause it was your idea to name the whole exhibit The Lightbringers.”

“…alright, fine. Yeah, it was sort of a tribute.” Michael chuckled.

Lucifer grinned. “Way to make me feel bad about hating you.”

“How about everyone else’s day?” GM asked.

Azrael shrugged. “I got to chase down another damned spirit, sooo…that was fun.”

“The cadets didn’t disappoint me.” Raphael said.

Camael sighed. “I’m still f*cking single-“

“Language!” Jophiel cried. “But I was actually free today. The orphanage took all the children on a field trip and I wouldn’t be back in time for this dinner!”

Gabriel blushed a bit. “I, uhh, just got some coffee with Nico. Nothing big.”

“I rewatched Hamilton for the 100th time.” Uriel said.

Michael smiled. “I got to bond with my step-son…learned he used to be a p*rn-star. Annabelle and Molly weren’t even surprised.”

“I’m not depressed right now. So, that’s good.” Lucifer said.

J hummed. “I did another routine checkup on Earth.”

Lucifer looked at him. “How’s it going?”

“It’s going, that’s for sure.” J laughed. “In all seriousness, it’s about as well as you’d expect. Some good, some bad, some in between.”

Charlie hummed. “Actually, Grandpa! That does make me ask something…so! You created the universe, right?”

GM nodded. “Every little galaxy.”

“Sooo…is there other life besides humans?” Charlie asked. “I hear a lot of conspiracy theories in Hell.”

GM chuckled. “No, not yet. I am considering it…but-“

“We can hardly manage Earth’s souls. I can’t imagine the migraines we’d get from multiple planets.” Michael laughed.

Azrael then snorted. “Besides, you should’ve seen what happened with the dinosaurs.”

Charlie’s eyes widened. “Oh?”

Camael began laughing a bit. “O-okay, Dad was playing catch with me. I told him ‘gimme all you got’ and…he threw the ball so fast that it became a meteor…annnd it hit Earth!”

GM chuckled sheepishly. “Not my proudest moment…”

Lucifer laughed. “Not so perfect now, Dad?”

“Don’t tempt him, brother.” Uriel chuckled. “He may just bring back the dinosaurs.”

GM hummed. “…you know, I could-“

“Please don’t.” Azrael said. “Humans die to animals all the time, we don’t need Jurassic Park in real life.”

Charlie tilted her head. “Jurassic what now?”

“It’s one of those fancy movies on Earth, Charlie! Too scary for my liking.” Jophiel giggled. “But can I just say how nice it is to finally have you and Lucifer here? I mean, Luci, we have to spend some more time together! We haven’t seen you in forever!”

Lucifer smiled a bit. “I…honestly didn’t think you guys missed me…”

Raphael was silent.

“Well, of course we did.” Uriel said. “And honestly, we never got to say sorry for taking a part in your-“

Raphael then sighed. “Father. Permission to speak?”

GM blinked. “You don’t need to ask, son.”

“I don’t think we need to apologize for that.” Raphael said.

Gabriel’s eyes widened. ‘Oh no…’

Lucifer slowly turned towards him. “And…why is that?”

“…Samael, I am happy to have finally met Charlie and I’m glad you’re doing well.” Raphael said. “But that doesn’t erase the fact that you did what you did.”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed. “Are you seriously still blaming me for evil being a thing!?”

“Not for that. It was going to happen eventually regardless.” Raphael said. “What I blame you for…is your betrayal of our family. For everything we worked so hard to preserve.”

Michael held up a hand. “Raph-“

“Michael, I need to say this.” Raphael said. “I-I don’t get it, Samael! To this very day, I don’t get it! What encouraged you to jeopardize everything our family and all of Heaven fought and struggled so hard for? Lilith could not have been that tempting! Especially considering she’s not even here with you right now!”

Charlie’s heart clenched and she looked down.

Uriel noticed and his eyes narrowed. “Raphael, calm down-“

“URIEL, I NEED TO GET THIS OUT!” Raphael cried. “Tell me, Samael!!! Please, for the love of Father!!! What did we not understand back then?! What did Lilith do to convince you to leave our family behind!?”

Lucifer was silent for a moment and he had to blink back a few tears. “…Raph…she didn’t do any convincing. Leaving you all for her was…was my choice.”

“…but why…?” Raphael whispered. “I don’t get it, Lucifer . I…I just don’t…and I want to. I want to forgive you for what you did back then, I just…I don’t think I can if I don’t get why.”

Lucifer faced his brother. “…back then, I…didn’t feel like Heaven was my home. My ideas were rejected and all The Elders seemed to think I was just a troublemaker. Even you guys didn’t really wanna talk to me or hear me out on all of my ideas…I was lucky my idea for the creation of ducks even got accepted . But…then, I met Lilith. She…she listened to me. She loved my ideas and whenever I would say one that was actually worth rejecting, she’d improve it! She had dreams of her own and for the first time, I felt like I wasn’t the only troublemaker in existence.”

Everyone, especially Charlie, listened in silence while facing The King of Hell.

“I fell so deeply for her…and maybe…maybe she no longer feels the same and that’s why she left. I stopped being the man she loved.” Lucifer said. “Wherever she is, I…I have to admit. I still love her…and that hurts me because she’s gone and I don’t know where or why. It hurts because I had left my family and my home for someone who left me in return…but, just because I love Lilith, doesn’t mean I love you guys any less.”

“…we can’t take back the past.” Charlie said suddenly. “Which is why we should try and look ahead! Even if we need some time to heal from any scars that the past has left behind.”

Lucifer smiled, nodding. “And I want you guys to be apart of Charlie’s life. Cause right now, she needs her family's support more than ever.”

Everyone smiled, except Raphael, who sighed. “…I still don’t get it. I still don’t get you.”

Charlie’s eyes then lit up suddenly and she stood from her chair. “Well…I might have an idea to express our feelings better!”

And suddenly, once again, music filled the air. Everyone’s eyes widened, especially when Charlie began to sing.

“~So, you’ve gone and called someone out! And in response, they caused trouble to rise! But there is where the conflict must end! Lest you both end up blind!~” Charlie sang. “~Sometimes the problems at play…are not all plain to see! So, we lash out at our loved ones! Disregarding our bond’s sanctity!~”

GM then stood from his chair as well. “~There are several sides to us that may seem abstract at first! Until we discover where everything fits! And people can be like a half-missing puzzle set! Once we find the pieces, things make more and more sense!~”

Michael noticed the confusion still evident on Raphael’s face. “I don’t think he follows.”

“Well, I’ll give an example!” Charlie grinned. “~I had this problem where I’d often hide my less than awesome feelings! So, when I would feel like sobbing, I’d just smile and crack jokes! I thought that it was coping, only joking, never showing sadness! Hoping it would go away!~”

Raphael looked up. “Did that work?”

Charlie shook her head. “Nope! ~I felt bad!~”

“Aw, Char.” Camael said.

“~It’s okay!~”

“How’s that?” J asked.

Lucifer then got up as well, standing beside his daughter. “~Cause everybody gets sad, even Dads who have people to care for! And therefore, you don’t have to hide your pain! Life without rainy days is incomplete!~”

Azrael hummed. “On the subject of rain! ~You once knew me as real gloomy. This weird, spooky, broody dude because I knew you’d listen to me. I was too scary to ignore. I thought that I could take it, all this hate could just be shaken, but when you feel love for someone, not much hurts more than their scorn. I just felt bad~”

Jophiel stood up. “Oh, come now…”

“~In a different way!~”

“Different how?”

“~By bad I mean, well, mean! But I did what I thought that I had to! Which is bad too! I don’t have to act all tough!~”

Charlie went over and hugged her uncle. “~Sometimes love is enough!~”

“~Or what we need!~” Jophiel sang.

Raphael then stood from his seat as well. “~That was a quaint little review of things that you all knew. But can this discourse resume, there’s pressing matters at hand~”

“~What? Can you not see the benefit?~” Uriel asked.

Raphael sighed. “~I don’t see how this could be relevant~”

“~Raphael, please~” J said.

“~Our goal’s benevolent~” Michael added.

“~You know me. I don’t get sentiment~”

Camael groaned. “ ~ Raph, c’mon!~”

“~This just serves as testament to the fact that, to me, it’s foolish sentiment. Which is fine! It works to your detriment! You not letting me finish is proving my-!~”

“HEY!” Gabriel cried suddenly. “~You’re lost~”

Raphael tilted his head. “I’m right here?”

“~It’s okay~” Uriel smiled.

“You’re acting weird…”

“~I was lost once too, but thanks to all of you, life doesn’t suck now~” Gabriel sang. “~We’re your best pals! No one wants to be a joke~”

“~But a life free of jokes is incomplete!!!~” GM and Lucifer sang.

Raphael then sighed. “Alright…forgive me then, this won’t be easy to put into lyrics…”

Camael grinned. “Lemme try for you then! ~I have an issue that feels new-school, I don’t wanna say I’m too cool! But I’m just too fab for you fools and I feel like you don’t get me!~”

Raphael blinked. “Not too far off, but it’s more insulting.”

“~It’s alright, Raphy!~” Camael grinned.

Jophiel then stepped forward. “~Honestly, it didn’t hurt us, it’s clear you’re the one that’s hurting~”

Raphael’s eyes widened. “Huh?”

“~You feel low~” Michael sang.

“That’s not true.”

“~It’s okay~” J added.

“Don’t assume!” Raphael cried.

Charlie then went over with a bright smile. “~You don’t need to save face, in almost any case, we embrace you!~”

“~No one hates you~” Lucifer sang. “~Everybody’s got flaws!~”

“~But with no you at all, I’m incomplete~” GM grinned, staring at his whole family.

Raphael finally began to properly smile as he slowly joined in as the Morningstar Family began to harmonize together.

“~There! Now we see! Everybody goes wrong, and we put it in song, so it’s easier to hear it!~”

GM then walked over. “~This puzzle's tough, I’ll admit. But, in time, we’ll find where everything fits~ ”

Raphael then sighed. “…thank you all. And I’m sorry for…bringing her up, Lucifer.”

Lucifer grinned and then hit his brother on the back. “Oh, don’t worry about it. You’re family, you grump.”

Charlie squealed. “YES!!! Singing triumphs again!!!”

Chapter 35: Episode 35: The Fallen Angel

Chapter Text

The third and final day in Heaven. Needless to say, everyone was spending it as best they could.

Charlie and Vaggie decided to go out on a proper date, especially since Heaven had plenty of things for them to do, even with yesterday’s exploring.

Cherri and Pentious were once again messing around, with Cherri starting to channel some of her more chaotic thoughts through art. She obviously wasn’t the absolute best, but she was getting there.

Alastor decided to spend the time he had with his mother while also trying to keep Nifty under control.

And finally, Husk invited Angel and his family to another one of Minnie’s concerts, with this one admittedly not being the biggest one. But a gig was a gig.

Although, this time…someone else decided to join them.

“Thanks for inviting me, Michael. I haven’t been to a concert in…150 years or so?” Lucifer said.

Michael shrugged. “Figured it would be a nice way for us to bond before you have to go back to Hell.”

Angel then started laughing suddenly as they began walking backstage.

“What’s so funny?” The Morningstar Twins asked in unison.

“I-I’m sorry…I can’t get over how short you two are.” Angel laughed.

Michael and Lucifer’s eyes just narrowed.

“…don’t make me tell your mother. She’s in the audience right now.” Michael said, crossing his arms.

“Oh, learn to take a joke!” Angel cried.

Then, the three eventually saw a familiar face and a new face at the same time.

“You don’t think that’s too much makeup, kiddo?” Husk asked.

Minnie giggled. “Yeah! It’s fine, Dad! Trust me!”

“Well, if you say so.”

“Hey! Husk!” Angel cried as he went over.

Husk smiled a bit. “Angel, good to see you made it.”

“What can I say? Heaven doesn’t have any gunfights every hour.” Angel said with a shrug.

Michael whipped towards his brother. “Is he kidding?”

“No. No, not really.” Lucifer sighed.

Minnie blinked. “Uhhh, Dad? Is this the spider guy you talked about?”

“Yup. This is Angel Dust. One of my pals down in Hell.” Husk said. “Angel, this is Minnie. My daughter.”

“Weird how you’re a cat and she’s a dog.” Angel joked before he shook Minnie’s hand. “Seriously, good to meet ya!”

“Good to meet you too!” Minnie smiled. “I can see why Dad likes you.”

Angel smirked. “Really now?”

Husk’s eyes narrowed as his cheeks went slightly red. “Ah, shut up. You’re still a pain in my ass no matter how much I like you.”

“Tell that to yourself alll you want.” Angel grinned.

Minnie then looked behind him…before she gasped and rushed over to the Morningstar Twins. “HOLY sh*t, YOU’RE LUCIFER!!!”

Lucifer blinked. “…uhhh. Yeah?”

“The first Fallen Angel, right!? I’m a huge fan! Well, not the whole Hell and unleashing evil thing, but your story is just kickass!!! I’m a rebel myself, heh!” Minnie smiled. “Hell, I named my band after you and the other Fallen Angels!”

Lucifer then noticed a poster nearby and sure enough, it was called Crymini’s Fallen Angels. He then looked back at Minnie. “…huh.”

“You okay?” Minnie asked.

“I’m…not used to having fans.” Lucifer blinked. “In fact, I’m surprised you’re my fan at all. I’m really not the greatest role-model. In fact, as my fan, please don’t unleash evil into the world.”

Michael snorted. “Forgive him. Like he just said, he really isn’t used to having anyone really praise him.”

“You seriously think I’m cool?” Lucifer asked.

Minnie nodded. “Well, yeah! After learning what actually happened to you and how you aren’t the growly-evil Devil that everyone said you were when I was alive.”

“That’s more Satan’s thing.” Lucifer said before smiling. “Well! I’m glad you think so highly of me! I’m kind of honored… is this what self-pride feels like-“

“OOH, I GOT AN IDEA!” Minnie cried. “How about you go on stage and sing?!”

Lucifer’s eyes widened. “Wait, what? Isn’t this your concert?”

“Well, yeah! But you’d be more of a warmup!” Minnie cried as her tail began wagging. “C’mon, please?”

Michael turned. “You do have a great singing voice, Luci.”

Lucifer tapped his fingers together for a second. “…well…oh, why not?”

“HELL YEAH!!! Literally!” Minnie laughed as she ran off. “Alana! Elijah! Have I got some news for you!!!”

Michael turned. “Do you have a song in mind?”

Lucifer opened his mouth before closing it…and then, he got an idea as he took his phone out and held it to his ear once it began ringing.

“Hello?”

“Heyyy, Stoley- nope. Nope, that was awful.” Lucifer sighed. “Listen, do you mind if I borrow one of your songs for a sec?”

Lilith stared at the oceans of Heaven, not even in her bathing suit anymore. She had been pondering the Heavenly Father’s words for the longest time and she didn’t know what to think.

She didn’t even know if she should believe him when he said that her family missed her.

But then, she heard the familiar sound of a portal opening up behind her and she turned her head.

“I thought you said you weren’t going to force me to do anything…?” Lilith asked meekly.

GM chuckled as he walked over. “I did. And I’m not. I merely want to show you something.”

“I doubt Heaven would react well if they saw me…”

“Which is why they won’t see you.” GM said as he offered his hand out. “And perhaps it’ll help you decide what to do…”

Lilith was silent for a while before she sighed and then walked through the portal, not taking The Father of Heaven’s hand.

GM then followed her as they landed on a rooftop that gave them a rather excellent view of a concert below.

Lilith tilted her head. “Why bring me here?”

“You’ll see.” GM said before pointing below.

And in the audience was another him and the rest of his children.

Lilith’s eyes widened at all of them being together…before she saw who walked onto stage.

“And now presenting, our band’s namesake, Lucifer Morningstar!!!” Minnie exclaimed as she stepped to the side and tossed the mic into the king’s hands.

Lucifer just barely caught it before clearing his throat as he stared at the shocked audience. “Ummm…hi, everybody!”

“…Luci…?” Lilith breathed.

“Now I know that a lot of you might be… surprised to see the King of Hell up here!” Lucifer said with a nervous chuckle. “But I’m not here to hurt anybody. Hell, I’ll be out of your hair later today! But, Minnie here has encouraged me to sing a bit of a warmup for you all.”

Then, the crowd started to cheer and even clap, clearly excited to see the kind of pipes Lucifer himself had. Even though a few of the Winners did still look a bit worried that The Devil was literally on stage, likely not knowing that Lucifer wasn’t evil like so many assumed.

“Now, this isn’t my song, cause I was kind of told to sing on short notice. Didn’t have time to write one, heh.” Lucifer said with a laugh. “But…when I heard it, I couldn’t help but be reminded of someone I lost. I don’t know why she left, but…wherever she is, I miss her.”

GM looked at Lilith, who didn’t dare take her eyes away from the stage.

“So…hit it!” Lucifer cried.

Then, Elijah, Alana, and Minnie started to play their instruments.

Lucifer took a deep breath before he started to sing into the microphone. “~I let you get too close…I let you fall too far. Now I know, now I know, now I know exactly what I am!~”

Then, angels constructed out of pure Hellfire appeared behind Lucifer. “~Nanananana…a Fallen Angel. Nanananana…a Fallen Angel~”

“~I don’t think you meant to hurt me…but did I mean a thing at all?~” Lucifer sang. “~At all, at all, at all…at all, at all, at all…at all, at all to you…?~”

“~Nanananana…a Fallen Angel. Nanananana…a Fallen Angel~”

Flames then consumed Lucifer and for a moment, everyone in the audience could see that he was in a barren wasteland with an all too familiar red sky.

The King of Hell himself was in torn up angellic robes, with his wings torn up and golden blood across his body as he walked. “~I let it go too long…I let you fall too deep! Now I know, now I know, now I know there’s one thing I can’t keep! But I, I keep on waiting…waiting to love you less than I do!~”

Then, a flaming figure who looked all too much like his queen appeared across from him.

Lucifer’s eyes widened and he began running to the flaming Lilith, trying to wrap his arms around her before she disappeared right before he could. “~But I do, oh I do, yes I still do love you!~”

Then, the flaming Lilith appeared on a nearby mountaintop. Lucifer spread his damaged wings as he began flying after her, only for her to appear on another one.

Mountaintop after mountaintop, the flaming Lilith kept appearing and disappearing whenever Lucifer got close to her. And each disappearance left behind visible flashbacks.

Lilith’s smiles and laughter, her demonic powers, her holding Charlie in her arms after she had been born, her speeches to all of Hell, her songs, and all the love she had to give.

But as Lucifer flew higher and higher, the flashbacks started to turn from that of happy to that of regret. Lilith’s smiles faded and turned to that of glares, tears, and even screams of frustration and anger.

“~But maybe it’s all on me! For missing every sign and every glance and every turn!~” Lucifer cried before he saw the flaming Lilith was at Heaven’s gates.

Several flaming angels appeared right beside her, shielding her from Lucifer. “~No, no, no! You’re a Fallen Angel!!!~”

Lucifer’s wings spread and he began flying towards Heaven. “~Maybe there’s something here for us to glean, for you to teach and me to try to learn!~”

Then, a flaming version of The Heavenly Father himself appeared. He was towering over Heaven and lifted his hand as Lucifer flew closer. “~No, no, no! You’re The Fallen Angel!!!~”

Lucifer tried reaching for Heaven to get to the flaming Lilith, but his wings suddenly began burning away bit by bit.

He started to fall, his queen getting further and further away from him.

“~But maybe I’m a thief! Thought were you mine to earn! What if I wasn’t that strong? What if I read this all wrong? What if we just don’t belong?! All this ‘what if, what if, what if, what if, what if, what if’ and ‘why, why, why, why, why, why’ makes me BURN!!!~”

Lucifer was then engulfed in the flames as everything returned to normal, and everyone could see him on stage with his new red wings spread wide. “~Oh, I don’t think you meant to hurt me! ‘Cause I don’t think I meant a thing at all!~”

“~Well, did we?~” A flaming Lucifer asked.

“~No, not at all!~”

“~Did we mean a goddamn thing?~”

Lucifer shut his now tearful eyes. “~At all, at all, at all~”

The crowd then began to sing along, with all of them now at ease over Hell’s king. But Lucifer’s family on the other hand were just staring at their brother in shock.

“~At all, at all, at all~”

GM then turned to Lilith and his eyes widened when he began to hear…sobs.

Lilith was staring at her husband, clutching the sides of the roof as tears streamed down her face. She couldn’t keep it together.

“~At all, at all to you…?~” Lucifer whispered before his eyes opened. “~Nanananana…the Fallen Angel. Nanananana…the Fallen Angel! Nanananana… her Fallen Angel~”

Lucifer then took a deep breath before he smiled. “Uhh…thanks, everyone! Enjoy the actual concert!”

Everyone cheered as Lucifer handed the mic back to Minnie and walked backstage.

He took a deep breath as he took a seat. “…kinda glad Charlie didn’t see that…”

But then, the door opened and in walked all of his siblings. Lucifer blinked. “Uhh, hey guys!”

Jophiel sniffled and then hugged her big brother tightly. “That was beautiful, Luci!!! I am so sorry!!!”

“…I didn’t think she meant that much to you.” Raphael muttered as he walked over. “Truly, I…I am sorry.”

Camael wiped his eyes. “ Dad-damn, big bro…you know how to sing …”

Lucifer smiled a bit as he hugged his sister back. “Hey, it’s okay…”

“…is it?” Gabriel asked. “Are you? ”

Lucifer’s eyes then softened. “…honestly? Not completely. But…having you guys back is a start.”

Lilith and GM returned to the beach, with Lilith remaining completely quiet as her tears dried on her face.

“…if that doesn’t prove they don’t miss you…I’m not sure what will.” GM said before opening another portal. “I hope that helped, Lilith.”

And as the Heavenly Father disappeared, The Queen of Hell fell to her knees, rubbing her wedding ring desperately.

Chapter 36: Episode 36: The Angel of Redemption

Chapter Text

This was it. It was time to say goodbye to Heaven.

For now, at least.

The beautiful dawn sky hit Heaven and everyone of the Hazbin Hotel had met up again.

“…gotta admit. I’m gonna miss this place already.” Husk sighed. “Guess it’s called Heaven for a reason, eh?”

Angel smiled sadly. “Honestly, it’s nice and all…but I’m mostly gonna miss my family.”

“Yeah. Me too.” Husk said. “Should we just get the goodbyes out of the way?”

Angel then turned around to see Cherri carrying Pentious bridal style. “Cher, you first.”

Cherri’s eye widened. “Aw, I can’t bring him with!?”

“Cherri, dear.” Pentious laughed. “It’sss alright. Perhapsss the Heavenly Father will allow me or you to visit again! And you’re being redeemed, aren’t you?”

“Emphasis on ‘working on it’.” Cherri sighed before she set Pentious down. “…love ya, Pen. And, uhh, thanks.”

“For what?”

Cherri laughed. “Just being my only good f*ckin’ boyfriend so far.”

Pentious’ cheeks reddened and he smiled before arms wrapped around him.

“Enjoy Heaven, Pentious!!! You earned it!!!” Charlie said with a wide smile. “And hopefully others will join you!!!”

Pentious smiled. “And thank you all…for being my friendsss…”

Angel grinned. “No problem, ya sentimental snake.”

Husk tipped his hat.

Alastor, however, was just silent. Even his smile was only half-there. Nifty was on his shoulder, even poking his cheek to see if he was still working.

“Dad says he wants to host a proper goodbye, so guess we should meet him.” Lucifer said.

But then, on cue, a portal opened right in front of them. They all walked through and were now…on a large stage. The majority of Heaven’s citizens were in the audience and cameras were around, likely filming them.

Charlie blinked. “…uhhh-“

“Sorry if this was sudden, Charlie!” GM laughed as he appeared on stage, the rest of his children behind him. “Like your father said, I wanted to do something special.”

Charlie’s eyes lit up. “Awwww, Grandpa!”

GM then summoned a microphone and cleared his throat before speaking to the large crowd. “People of Heaven! As you no doubt know, I allowed the residents of the Hazbin Hotel to visit. Some of you welcomed them with open arms, others were afraid because…well. Demons in Heaven isn’t common.”

There were a few agreeing murmurs.

“But I’d like to personally end that kind of view. Any demon I allow here is just as much a person as you and me. And frankly, Hell isn’t what a lot of you think it is. You wouldn’t believe how many Sinners and Hellborn down there are just trying to keep a roof over their heads.” GM said. “And I’m happy you treated them as such, whether you were family or not. And speaking of family…I got the chance to see mine again.”

He smiled at Lucifer and Charlie. “My son and my granddaughter…who have made me so proud. My entire family has, even if they’ve messed up. But if the universe’s creator isn’t perfect, why should the universe be? So, I’d like to thank Charlie Morningstar for the creation of the Hazbin Hotel.”

Then, Michael walked over and whispered to his niece. “Pst. Kneel.”

Charlie’s eyes widened and she nodded, slowly and slightly awkwardly kneeling before her grandfather.

GM then suddenly summoned a sword, but then looked at the audience. “Don’t worry, it’s foam.”

The audience let out a few chuckles.

The Heavenly Father then looked at his granddaughter. “As a reward for rehabilitating the first ever Sinner and showing Heaven the error of its ways…I name Charlotte Morningstar, daughter of Lucifer Morningstar…”

He then gently tapped the sword on both of Charlie’s shoulders. “The Angel of Redemption.”

Then, Charlie began glowing and she floated in the air as the glow enveloped her. And when the glow faded, all six of her wings were out and her suit had changed.

A red suit with longer coattails, gold trimming, and a tophat with a large crown wrapped around it. And finally, she had a gold and black trident in her hands.

Everyone clapped, especially Lucifer. “THAT’S MY GIRL!!!!”

Vaggie’s face reddened at the new suit as Charlie slowly landed back on stage.

Charlie looked at herself before smiling wide. “It’s perfect!!!”

“And you have some nifty new powers to go along with the title!” GM smiled. “You will be able to look into anyone’s soul and see if they are worth giving a second chance.”

Charlie’s eyes lit up before everyone else went over to her, clearly as proud of her as they could be.

“Thank you for your time, citizens of Heaven!” GM smiled.

And then, GM waved his cape around and suddenly, all of them were now at Heaven’s gates.

Including Annabelle, Molly, Lucille, and Minnie.

Pentious eventually slithered over with them, still smiling wide at his friends.

Angel’s eyes watered and he went over and hugged his mother and sister. “…I’m gonna miss you…”

“Honey…this isn’t goodbye.” Annabelle whispered, wiping away her son’s tears. “It’s just a ‘see you later’.”

“You better get redeemed quick, bro! I’ve waited decades, you ain’t failing me now!” Molly teased, throwing her brother into a headlock and ruffling his hair.

Minnie then wiped her eyes and quickly pulled her father into a hug. “…please come back soon, Papa…”

Husk looked at Alastor, his heart clenching once he realized he was still owned by The Radio Demon. But, he smiled down at his little girl. “I will, kiddo…just keep your chin up for me. Okay?"

Minnie nodded, her tail lightly wagging as she smiled with tears going down her face.

Lucille then stepped closer to her son, caressing his face. “My dear precious boy…”

“…Mother…” Alastor whispered.

“Remember what you promised me…?” Lucille asked.

Alastor nodded slowly. “And I’ll remember it…”

“…good. I love you, child. Don’t ever forget that.” Lucille said before looking down. “And you, missy…”

Nifty blinked and then grinned. “Yes, Alastor’s mom?”

“Keep yourself in line.”

“Okay, ma’am!”

And finally, Charlie and Lucifer looked at their family.

J walked over first. “Thank you all for coming. It was a delight to have you here.”

Azrael went over, hugging Charlie. “Visit us soon, okay?”

“You’re one of us now after all.” Raphael chuckled. “Vaggie? Keep her safe.”

Vaggie saluted. “Of course…sir. For old times sake.”

Raphael chuckled a bit.

Camael then went over and hugged both her brother and niece. “I’m gonna miss you both so dad-damn much!”

Lucifer and Charlie quickly struggled to breathe, hitting her back before they were let go.

“Gotta work on that.” Camael said with a sheepish chuckle.

Uriel then went over and helped his brother and niece up, shaking her hand in the process. “Come again soon.”

“Y-yeah! And good luck with all those Sinners!” Gabriel said.

Jophiel then went over. “And we’re definitely going to visit you!!!”

“Just don’t treat us like the Exorcists!” Michael laughed. “And…Lucifer?”

Lucifer turned. “Hmm?”

“…thank you. For giving me another chance to be your brother.” Michael smiled.

Lucifer smiled back. “What can I say? I’m a forgiving guy lately.”

And finally, Cherri gave Pentious one last goodbye kiss.

GM then snapped his fingers and created the portal to Hell. “I’m going to be busy for quite a while…but? I think I can squeeze in a tiny visit next week!”

Charlie smiled wide. “Thanks, Grandpa…for everything.”

Angel grinned. “Yeah…literally, thank God.”

GM’s smile only grew bigger. “No. Thank you. Goodbye, my family. For now.”

Everyone started to wave and cry out their goodbyes as the residents of the Hazbin Hotel walked through the portal and it closed behind them.

But when they arrived, the hotel was suddenly…occupied.

Specifically, by a group of Sinners being shown around by…Frank. The only surviving Egg Boi.

Right. We forgot about him.

“And this is the lobby!!! It’s a lobby!!!” Frank smiled.

Angel recognized one of the Sinners off the bat and rubbed his eyes. “…Niss?”

‘Niss’ slowly turned. “Tony?”

Then, a fish Sinner with glasses and some kind of dark labcoat walked over. “Ummm! Excuse me! Can you tell us where Princess Charlie is?”

“She owns this f*ckin’ hotel, doesn’t she?” Another Sinner asked.

Charlie's eyes were wide…before she smiled wide, determination in her eyes. “Alright, everyone. Let’s get to work!”

Chapter 37: Episode 37: The Queen's Return

Chapter Text

One week. It had been one week since the visit in Heaven and the Hazbin Hotel was busy.

Seemed all the advertising that Grandpa Morningstar had The Vees and Alastor do paid off. Because the very following day after accepting the new Sinners, about three more came.

It wasn’t packed, but it was still a significant amount.

And Charlie was ecstatic. Some Sinners were actually willing to give the hotel a try!

Even if there was some...tension between Angel and his own brother.

Arackniss was his full name, or his Sinner name at least. And he was…rather reserved and quiet compared to his younger brother.

Professor Baxter also seemed to be an interesting one. A self-proclaimed mad scientist. And he got along well with…Nifty of all people.

But needless to say, Charlie was more than happy to help them. And her new powers as the Angel of Redemption came in handy.

“Today’s activity is a bit different this time!” Charlie smiled before she snapped her fingers and suddenly, journals appeared in each of the Sinners’ hands.

Angel blinked. “Uhhhh...I don't get it, Char.”

Baxter hummed. “Oh, it’s in my colors!!!”

“Yeah, uhh, Char. Ya might need to explain.” Cherri said.

Charlie smiled. “Well, I did some more research on activities for rehabilitation and I learned of a therapeutic way to express your feelings! Sometimes outwardly talking about how you feel can be scary and… overwhelming . So, this is a way to just write them down and get them on paper! And these journals are private! No one can read them but you! And they’re mystically designed that way!”

Angel hummed. “Huh. Okay.”

“Ugh...writin' in a diary like a girl? Damnit.” Arackniss grumbled.

Cherri gave him a look. “What? Got a problem with that?”

Charlie crossed her arms. “Cherri.”

Cherri sighed. “I’m sorry, I’m f*ckin’ sorry. He’s just-“

“How about you write what you feel down then? Again, no one can see it but you.” Charlie smiled. “Watch!”

She then grabbed her own journal and scribbled something down before showing it off, and to their eyes, it was completely blank.

“Huh. Okay.” Angel grinned. “That’s actually pretty cool.”

“Right!?” Charlie squealed. “But anyway, I hope you can all make daily progress reports for yourself! Write down how you feel or maybe even doodle how you feel if that’s better for you!”

Baxter raised his hand.

“No, you cannot make the journal sentient…although, that would be cool.”

“It really would.” Baxter smiled.

But then, suddenly, a familiar heavenly portal opened up behind Charlie and then suddenly pulled her into a hug.

“How’s my favorite granddaughter doing!?” GM cried as he held Charlie up before whispering. “Don’t tell Molly.”

Charlie snorted and laughed before facing everyone. “Grandpa, I’m working!”

“Oh! I see you have new guests!!!” GM smiled. “Hello!”

Arackniss blinked. “The f*ck? Tony, who's this?”

“That’s God.” Angel said simply.

Arackniss' eyes nearly bulged out of his skull. “... no sh*t?”

“Nnnooope. Sup, Big G!”

“Hi, new grandson!” GM said with a wave.

Baxter rubbed his eyes. “…God i-is real?”

“I’m standing right here, am I not?” GM asked as he set his granddaughter down.

“…my life of science being the sole reason for existence has been a lie.” Baxter whispered.

GM chuckled. “But sorry to interrupt, Charlie. You won’t even notice I’m here.”

Charlie giggled. “Actually, how about you join us?”

“Oh, alright!” GM said, taking a seat beside everyone.

Arackniss made a squeaking noise, hiding under his chair.

Angel laughed. “He'll...probably need a minute.”

“Take your time, Arackniss.” GM said.

Another Sinner’s eyes narrowed. “I ain’t buying it. I thought you were supposed to look like…Morgan Freeman.”

“…me-dammit, that was a good one. Why didn’t I do that?” GM hummed. “But you don’t need to believe me, let’s just focus on Charlie’s lesson.”

Charlie smiled wide at her grandfather before clearing her throat. “Now-“

Then, the doorbell rang.

GM quickly made a copy of himself, which walked over and answered the door.

And...there she was.

Lilith.

She stood there, a guilty look on her face.

All four of GM’s eyes widened. “Oh, dear me…”

“Grandpa? Who is it?” Charlie called.

“Uhhhh…it’s…uhhh…!” GM gulped. “Charlie, how about I lead the group today?”

Charlie’s eyes widened. “Y-you’re sure? Who is-“

“I-I insist! It’s…it’s for you to say the least.”

Lilith took a deep breath. Then...she stepped inside.

Angel’s eyes bulged. “Dio mio…”

Everyone else gasped, well aware that it was the Queen of Hell herself.

Charlie took one look…and then froze, dropping her journal.

“…M…Mom…?”

Vaggie’s eye widened and she raced over, standing by Charlie’s side protectively.

Lilith's eyes softened. “...hi, Charlie…”

GM took a deep breath. “E-everyone else? Follow me…this is a family matter.”

Everyone else followed, even Vaggie had to be pulled away from her girlfriend until Charlie and Lilith were the only ones left in the room.

Charlie’s powers kicked in and her eyes glowed as she looked over Lilith, trying to see if this really was her mother…and it was.

“…y-you’re…you’re really here…”

Lilith took a deep breath. "I-I am..."

Charlie slowly stepped forward, tears already in her eyes. “I-I…w-where did…h-how-“

"I...I was in Heaven." Lilith confessed, looking at the floor in shame.

And those four words shattered Charlie’s entire world.

“…y-you…you were in H-Heaven…?” She whispered. “F…for how long…?”

"For...for the past seven years." Lilith's voice cracked.

The Princess of Hell was deathly silent as her wide eyes looked down while her brain processed what she had just been told.

Seven years… her mother wasn’t missing or captured or even hurt or forced…

"…t-this whole time…?” Charlie breathed, tears already starting to fall. Her hands were shaking. “Y-you were in Heaven…t-this whole time…?”

“Yes.” Lilith's eyes watered at the pain in her daughter's voice.

But...she wasn't going to use excuses. She owed her daughter the full truth, and if Charlie needed to be angry with her, she'd accept it.

And Charlie was once again rendered silent for a moment before she opened her mouth. “…why?”

Lilith took a deep breath.

“It wasn't your fault. O-or your father's. Honestly...it was both me and your father's. When...when we were sent here, I had hoped we could start anew. Make better lives for ourselves. But...that was easier said than done. We tried to make the best of it, but...your father didn't want this kingdom. He was unhappy...and I felt responsible for it. I just wanted him to be happy again. See the man who brought me so much joy again. And then...when you came along, his eyes sparkled again. For a few years, I saw the man I fell in love with again...unfortunately though...your father continued seeing the worst of humanity, and...and he just felt worse . Even before you were born, I had been running the kingdom by myself, and...and as you got older, he began locking himself away again...not just from me, but even from you . I...I was so stressed...and over time, as you grew up, I began feeling angry. Not at you, but at him for missing your life.”

Charlie didn’t say anything. She was just quiet.

“And then...he approved the Exterminations...I was crushed ...my purpose was to uplift the Sinners with my songs...I had gotten to know them...I realized that they were still people who lost their way...yes, many of them deserved eternal damnation, but there were still those who weren't truly heartless...so when your father approved the Exterminations to kill our people...it broke my heart…”

Charlie then remembered the fight all that time ago. Razzle and Dazzle had to cover her ears and keep her distracted while her parents screamed at each other. She wasn’t that young at the time, but young enough to start crying at the sound of her parents fighting.

“I was just so angry...he kept saying these horrible things...and when I tried to explain that these were our people, our kingdom..."

Lilith's eyes watered, and she tried not to cry as she recalled those hurtful words. Those words that still hurt her all of these years later.

“…and then you left…?” Charlie asked, looking up at her mother. “Y-you left Dad…you left…me?”

“I-I won't use it as an excuse, but...after that fight, I felt like I ruined your father's life...I began feeling like I would ruin yours as well... I thought you two would be better off without me…”

“…better off…?” Charlie asked as she sniffled. “M-Mom…I needed you! Dad needed you! Hell needed you! And you just…l-left!”

She finally started to cry. “Y-you left without a trace!!! Dad searched for you for two whole years!!! I-I thought you could’ve died or got kidnapped!!! I had to convince myself you were just busy so I could feel better!!! I called you every single day for YEARS!!! I WENT THROUGH SO MUCH SO I COULD MAKE YOU PROUD!!!”

Lilith's eyes watered. She didn't try to justify herself. She couldn't. She had hurt her daughter. This was the consequence. She knew that she deserved every bit of it.

“I made this hotel to save our people!!! I fought against Adam and almost DIED! I made a deal with an Overlord for Grandpa’s sake!!!” Charlie sobbed. “Y-you think I didn’t need you!?! I NEEDED YOU, MOM!!! I NEEDED YOU SO MUCH!!!”

All six of her wings spread and even her horns came out as she suddenly fell to her knees. “S-seven years…SEVEN YEARS!!! WERE YOU EVER PLANNING TO COME BACK TO DAD!?! TO ME!?!”

Lilith didn't say anything. She just slowly walked over, and knelt before her daughter.

“...you never left my mind. Not once. Nor did your father. I'm sorry, my sweet baby…”

Charlie just broke as she pulled her mother into a hug, clutching her dress tightly as she sobbed into her chest, like she was a little girl all over again.

She missed her too much.

Lilith felt tears streaming down her cheeks as she hugged her little girl back, sobbing quietly herself.

“I'm sorry, I’m sorry, I'm sorry, I’m so sorry…”

The Angel of Redemption didn’t speak, all she could do was cry. Her tophat had fallen right off her head.

And all The Queen of Hell could do was cradle her daughter, the guilt still on her shoulders like a massive weight.

And her daughter was too scared to let go.

Chapter 38: Episode 38: The First Lovers

Chapter Text

Charlie held onto her mother for what felt like hours. She didn’t know how long it had been and she didn’t care.

She was too afraid to let go, as if she would disappear all over again.

And Lilith didn't let go of her either. She just held Charlie close, gently running her hand through her daughter's hair.

Charlie then looked up at her mother. “I-I…I can’t forgive you yet…but please don’t leave me again, Mom…”

“Never.” Lilith said softly, kissing Charlie’s forehead. “I am never leaving you again, baby…”

Charlie hugged her mother tighter, sniffling as her crying finally began to calm down.

…and then, she heard a door open.

“Hey, Charlie! Are any of the guests coming to Duck Therapy yet? I’ve been looking forward to debuting it!”

Lilith's eyes widened and her breath hitched.

“Luci…” She whispered.

Charlie wiped her eyes, still holding onto her mother before calling out. “D…Dad! C…can you come over?”

And seconds later, Lucifer flew over. “What’s up, Char-“

Then, The King of Hell’s eyes widened and his wings didn’t even retract into his back as he landed on the ground. All he did was stare.

Lilith swallowed, slowly standing up, still holding Charlie in her arms.

Charlie slowly wiped her eyes with her wing and then went from hugging her mother to just holding her hand. “…she’s here, Dad.”

Lucifer didn’t say a word.

Lilith took a shaky breath.

“I...I know what you're going to say, Luci... 'how could I have done this? Stayed away all of these years? Why didn't I come back to you, to our daughter...?' I...I won't excuse it. I...I just didn't have a sign that- that you would change, that anyone here was going to change. I-I pleaded so many times for you to stop the Exterminations, to just give our people a fighting chance, but...but you didn't listen. You only saw them as psychopaths, and...and you just didn't want to try and understand…”

Then, the former Angel of Light began to walk closer. His steps echoed throughout the entire hotel.

Lilith winced. “When...when we had that fight, I...I felt like I ruined your life, like...like you and Charlie didn't need me...I know that I left you and Charlie alone. I-I was wrong, and...and I see that now.”

Silence.

Lilith felt herself tearing up when she only heard silence.

“S-stop being so stoic, Luci! Scream! Shout! Just- just say something!”

Then, Lucifer was now face to face with her. He looked up and suddenly placed a hand on her cheek…caressing it.

Charlie very slowly let go of her mother’s hand, backing up to let her father have his own moment with her.

And then…Lucifer finally spoke.

“…you’re as beautiful as the day I lost you.”

Lilith's eyes widened...and then her eyes watered. She pulled Lucifer into a hug, beginning to sob .

Lucifer wrapped his arms and his wings around his queen, his hat falling right off his head as tears streamed from his shut eyes.

And for a moment...Lilith was reminded of when they were back in Eden. When Lucifer had been the silly angel she'd fallen in love with.

The dreamer who convinced her that she was her own person free to make her own choices.

She could see the man she wanted to marry again.

Then, Lucifer’s wings flapped as he flew lightly above her before he cupped her face and kissed her.

Lilith blushed...but she kissed him back, gently wrapping her arms around his neck.

Lucifer moved his arms to around her waist, carrying Lilith into the air as he kissed her.

Charlie couldn’t help but smile. She remembered how despite everything, she would always see how in love her parents were when she was little.

Whether they would be dancing, cuddling, holding hands, they would almost never hesitate to show affection. Even in a completely public place, they didn’t care.

In fact...the way Lilith looked at Lucifer as she gently parted the kiss...

It reminded Charlie of the way Vaggie looked at her.

Charlie’s smile only grew at that…and then she noticed that her mother’s wedding ring was still there.

Seems she was just as much of a hopeless romantic as she and her father were.

Lucifer then gently flew down as he looked at his wife with a large smile. But, it slowly faded. “…let me guess. You were in Heaven this whole time…?”

Charlie slowly stepped forward. “She was…”

Lucifer let out a weak chuckle. “The last place I’d look…”

Lilith's face filled with shame. “I...I made a deal with Adam. I'd stay where he could 'keep' me, as long as he never went near the two of you during the Exterminations...obviously, he didn't keep that part of the deal.”

“Typical of him…” Lucifer said before his smile returned. “…I don’t think I can forgive you for leaving right now, but…at the same time? I’m the reason you left, Lily. I’d probably do the same if I were you…and I’m just too happy to have you back.”

Charlie walked over. “…you think we can get a family therapist?” She asked as she hugged both her parents.

Lucifer snorted a bit, his eyes still watery as he wrapped his wings around his daughter and wife. “I’d say so.”

Lilith giggled, holding Lucifer and Charlie close. “Oh, yes. Absolutely.”

Lucifer smiled wide as he finally got to hold his family in his arms again.

And it was like this for a while before eventually, the door opened.

“Vaggie, please, I insist it is a family moment-!”

“I just need to see if she's okay-!”

Lilith's eyebrows raised. “Who's that?”

Charlie’s eyes lit up and she very slowly let go of her parents. “O-oh! Umm, Mom! This is actually kind of perfect!!!”

And sure enough, GM and Vaggie were walking through the door.

GM was about to say something else before seeing the large hug. “…oh! I can see it went well!”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed. “Dad…did you know Lily was in Heaven?”

“…to be fair, son…this is far from the first time she’s done the exact opposite of what I wanted…but yes. And I am sorry. I wanted her to tell you on her own.”

“…fair.” Lucifer sighed.

Vaggie then walked over, holding Charlie’s hand, her face filled with concern. “You okay, hermosa...?”

Charlie smiled and pressed her forehead against Vaggie’s. “I’m okay, mi amor.”

She then faced her mother. “Mom? This is Vaggie. My girlfriend.”

“And get this! She’s a Fallen Angel too!” Lucifer grinned. “She’s been Charlie’s partner with this hotel for years.”

Lilith's eyes lit up and almost immediately, she hugged Vaggie. “Welcome to the family, dear!”

Vaggie was surprised, but slowly hugged her back. “O-oh, uh, thank you, your highness…”

Then...Lilith made a connection and her eyes narrowed. “...Adam named you, didn't he?”

Vaggie’s eye widened and she laughed sheepishly. “…yes?”

“Don’t worry! Adam’s dead, Mom…and I’m actually happy about someone dying for once!” Charlie said.

Lucifer laughed. “You should’ve been there, Lily! It was awesome! And now we’ll never have to see him again.”

GM slowly nodded. “…yes…never have to see him again…”

Lilith gave GM a look. “...Yeah. Sure, Heavenly Father…”

GM nervously sweat since, well, he outright told Lilith earlier that Adam was in Hell now.

“…okay, gonna start ignoring that.” Lucifer said.

And eventually, the day turned into night. Lilith would get to properly meet everyone else soon enough.

It was almost difficult for Charlie to leave her mother’s side, but she did eventually leave to her own room.

“And this is where I’ve been staying. A lot less lonely than the palace.” Lucifer chuckled, showing his room in the hotel.

Lilith giggled, and cooed when she saw the rubber ducks. “Awwww! You still make these?”

Lucifer’s cheeks reddened slightly and he nodded. “M-maybe…”

He then noticed the ducks of him and Lilith on his desk and quickly hid them.

Lilith giggled. “Oh, Luci...you're still so adorable!”

“Awwww, Lily!” Lucifer laughed. “And you’re still more gorgeous than Heaven itself.”

Lilith blushed. “Oh, please…”

Lucifer smirked a bit and stepped forward. “Man calls me the Father of Lies, but I could never lie of such beauty. Such a face is truly one of a kind.”

Lilith blushed more, laughing. “Luuuuuuccci!”

“Oh, hush! You’d do the exact same to me!” Lucifer laughed, nuzzling her.

But then, his smile faded. “…but…I really am sorry…”

Lilith's eyes softened. “Lucifer-“

“I-I can’t excuse leaving Charlie. I love you, but…yes. She did need you.” Lucifer sighed. “…but I’m the one who should be blamed.”

He looked out the window for a moment. “You were right. Hell was supposed to be our kingdom. These Sinners and Hellborn, no matter how awful they can be, are still our people. And we should strive to make it better, not just meekly hope it all goes away. I should’ve never approved the Exterminations…I shouldn’t have let my fears stop me from being the man you agreed to marry…”

He then faced her. “I was no better than Adam. I approved of Adam’s ideas because I didn’t care what would happen. I didn’t give you a choice…so I really can’t be mad at you for leaving when I’m the cause of it…”

Lilith looked at him softly. “But...I also can't blame you for feeling hopeless…”

Lucifer looked into her eyes. “…it was just hard to feel happy in a place where there was so much darkness…”

“I know...I tried so hard…”

“You did…you and Charlie were my only lights…” Lucifer whispered. “And I should’ve seen that…when you’re in darkness, you can always get back up and brighten it.”

He then held her hands…and he began to sing softly. “~I was told that Heaven’s never too far gone. I was told my soul was meant to sing a song, but as I tarried through life, I learned that that was not quite so~”

Lilith's eyes softened. “Darling…”

“~Through right and wrong and perpetual sin…forever bound to struggle from within. I was sold a lie, I thought that Heaven were those people and I didn’t want to sing their song~”

Lucifer then suddenly began to smile, gently pulling his wife closer. “~But grace…how sweet it sounds. Claimed and loved for nothing…redeemed. You were lost, but now found!!!~”

He then created a portal to an all too familiar golden pocket realm he had created. Something he and Lilith would visit all the time in Eden.

“~Can I hope? Can I change? Can I erase a past that has caused so much pain?~” Lucifer sang as his wings spread once again. “~Wash it clean! White as snow! Surely there’s Hell to pay, but I’ll never…be the same~”

Lilith's eyes lit up. “I...I remember this place…”

Lucifer’s grin only grew wider before he flew into the air. “~I was told that Heaven’s streets were paved with gold! I was told that I would never walk alone! But my hands and feet are bloodied, and no one wants a Sinner’s lot~”

He then flew down, scooping Lilith into his arms as he began flying with her. “~If man cannot forgive what I have done…and man was made from Father up above, then why give us a choice? We know that I will lose control! But love…you hold my hand. You tell me I am worthy of love and to not hold back!!!~”

Lilith smiled softly at Lucifer and held him close. “~I only give what you gave to me, my dear~”

Lucifer nuzzled her before he dove further into the stardust-filled void of the realm. “~I can hope! I can change! I can fix up the past that has caused so much pain! Wash it clean! White as snow! But even with all of that, I may never be the same!!!~”

He then tossed her into the air before catching her again. “~You can love! You can change! We can fix up the past that’s caused us this pain! Wash it clean! White as snow! Surely there’s Hell to pay! In this cage, we won’t stay! But with all of that, we may never…be the same~”

He then slowly flew to the ground, setting down his wife. “…will you give this Fallen Angel another chance…?”

Lilith smiled and pulled him into a deep kiss. “Forever and always, darling…”

Lucifer’s wings spread as wide as they could as he melted into the kiss.

The world- the universe’s first lovers…they had so much to work through, but…they could rest easy in each other’s arms knowing it would be fixed eventually.

"Oh! By the way, we have a new daughter!"

"Wait, what-"

Chapter 39: Finale...?

Chapter Text

Grandpa Morningstar stood from his desk in Heaven before facing…you.

“Oh, hello there! I hope you’ve enjoyed so many of these chapters! Frankly, it was much more than even I was expecting…but now? We’ve reached the end of our time here. Not much left to do! So…I figured it could be fun to do one last send-off. A proper thank you…and what better way to do that…”

(Finger snap!)

GM: Then through the only way we know how? Hit it!

(Music fills the air. It’s cheery and upbeat, yet with a violin’s woeful goodbye as well. It’s the song written by BlackGryph0n: ‘THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT.)

GM: ~It’s been a blast, been a slice, been a helluva ride! We’ve had some laughs, had some fights! Even some of us cried! But all good things must come to an end, and I guess this is our time-!~

(Alastor comes in and blocks The Heavenly Father with a large grin, even using his tentacles to lift himself up.)

Alastor: ~So, so long! Farewell! And we’ll see you on the other side! But it’s not goodbye forever! Cause we’re all down here together! And we hope we get to see you when you die!~

(The spotlights shine on the entire main cast.)

The Hazbin Hotel: ~We may be monsters, creeps, and killers! But we’ll miss you just the same! And don’t be sad, we’re stuck for eternity in constant torture, fire, and pain! Cause there is love and joy and laughter! Who cares if it’s wrong or right? We had so much fun, so thank you and goodnight! Goodnight! Goodnight! Thank you and goodnight! Goodnight! Goodnight!~

GM: Take it away, Angel!!!

Angel Dust: ~What a trip, never had such a natural high!~

GM: Now Husker!

Husk: ~Hey, I’d buy you a drink, but I’m not that kind of a guy. Or not~

(Cherri Bomb spins Sir Pentious around, dipping the snake as he went red in the face.)

Cherri Bomb: ~You’re the bomb, you’re the blowout, no doubt the cherry of my eye!~

(Nifty then crawls onto GM’s hat, staring into the audience with a grin.)

Nifty: ~And thought you gotta check out, I’ll keep it neat and tidy ‘til next time! Buh-bye! ~

Vaggie: ~But we won’t leave you with nothing!~

Lucifer: ~Cause we hope we gave you something!~

Alastor: ~Even if that something made your conscience cryyyy~

(The room goes dark, shining a spotlight on Charlie alone as she takes off her tophat, her wings spreading wide.)

Charlie: ~If anyone out there can hear me…I have one last thing to say. Despite the unideal location…we hope you enjoyed your stay! Cause there was love and joy and laughter! It’s not perfect, but we tried~

(The spotlights shine on every member of the cast, not just the main stars. The Seven Deadly Sins, I.M.P, Prince Stolas, The Vees ((except Valentino)), The Archangels, J, Lucille, Annabelle, Molly, Minnie, Sera, Emily, The Overlords, Adam, Lute, and Lilith.)

All: ~We had so much fun, so thank you! We had so much fun, so thank you! We had so much fun, so thank you and goodniiiight! We may be monsters, creeps, and killers! But we’ll miss you just the same! And don’t be sad, we’re stuck for eternity in constant torture, fire, and pain! But there is love and joy and laughter! Who cares if it’s wrong or right!? We had so much fun, so thank you! We had so much fun, so thank you! We had so much fun, so thank you and goodnight!!! Thank you and goodnight! Goodnight! Goodnight! Thank you and goodnight! Goodnight! Goodnight!~

(Everyone in the cast begins to dance or spin around while singing. Couples would dance with each other hand in hand, solo acts would dance and laugh to the music.)

All: ~Cause there is love and joy and laughter! Who cares if it’s wrong or right?~

GM: ~We had so much fun, so thank you and… goodnight~

CREDITS

Thomas Sanders as Grandpa Morningstar and Leviathan

Erika Henningsen as Charlotte Morningstar

Jeremy Jordan as Lucifer and Michael Morningstar

Eden Espinosa as Lilith Morningstar

Wagner Moura as Azrael Morningstar

Sean Austin as Raphael Morningstar

Bryce Pinkham as Uriel Morningstar and Stolas Goetia

Caleb Hyles as Gabriel Morningstar

Sarah Nicole-Robles as Camael Morningstar and Molly

Elsie Lovelock as Jophiel Morningstar

Kyle Land as Jesus/J and Abel

Stephanie Beatriz as Vaggie

Blake Roman as Angel Dust and The Egg Boiz

Keith David as Husk

Amir Talai as Alastor

Kimiko Glenn as Nifty and Arthur

Krystina Alabado as Cherri Bomb

Alex Brightman as Sir Pentious and Adam

Jessica Vosk as Lute and Victoria

Patina Miller as Sera

Shoba Narayan as Emily

Monica Franco as Annabelle

Anika Nono Rose as Lucille

Mae Whitman as Crymini

James Monroe Iglehart as Zestial/Cain and Asmodeus

Daphne Rubin-Vega as Carmilla Carmine

Christian Borle as Vox

Joel Perez as Valentino

Lilli Cooper as Velvette

Brandon Rogers as Blitzø

Richard Horvitz as Moxxie

Vivian Toxon as Millie and Belphegor

Erica Lindbeck as Loona

Kesha as Beelzebub

Patrick Page as Satan

Michael Cusack as Mammon

Grey DeLisle as R̴͕̹̰͈͛̓̉̓̈́̋̑̾̈́̇̿̔̏̚͠ô̴̝̭̥͎̺̰̳̟͖͗͌̎̀̅̂̇̚̚͜͝o̸̡̹̖̫͆̓̽̃̅͐̂̉͘͠͝

Roo: Surprise!!! Did you seriously think we were done? No, no, no…we got a tiny bit more left! This certainly isn’t goodbye! We got a long-ass wait until Season 2 of the actual show. Awww, did any of you think this was canon? It’s not. And it’s never gonna be…but? Maybe. Just maybe, I’ll make an appearance. Maybe I’ll act different, talk different…but either way …evil never sleeps…

S̸̡̻̰̟͓̖̗̗͍̬̦̺̥͒́̃̐̍͆̍̾͗́͝͝͝͠ͅƠ̵̞̭͎͎̊̎̀͛̀ ̶̭̺̮̾̈͐́̅̈́͒͂͊͆͆ͅI̸̧̢̞̣̬͓̮͙͉̯̻̭͎̤̱͌̏͌̆̿̄͗͗̔͘̚͠ ̶̨̛̦͍͈̆̈́̀̈̒͗̉̌͋̉̓̚͝Ǹ̵̨̗͓͍̖̣͚͚͔̝͕̥Ē̴̮̰̗͎͈̦͌̊̄̍̄͒̇̿̿̐͝V̸͈͑͂̅̇́Ȩ̶͖̲͈̥̼͂́̂́͂̋̽̄̀̊̆͝Ŗ̵̛͉̹̟̟̮̦͓̲̞̹͙͇͍̆̔̿̍̃͒̆̀̈́́͋̆̀͜ ̵̡͎̭̳̳͍̩̯̀̈́͝D̵̠͔͍̯̗̥̝͂͊̂̍͌̅̾̈́̈́̎́͋͘͜Ï̶̢̧̨̞̝͉͓̠͚̞̰̮̳͚̭̆͒͛̒͂͗̽͝E̷̢̟̘̦͂͑͑́̇̏͌̒́͝.̸̡͎͉̻̪̤͖̜̯̘̈́͆͂͂͂͌͆

Chapter 40: Epilogue: Helluva Wedding

Chapter Text

Sometime in the not so distant future…

“Okay! Is everything in order?” Vaggie asked as she looked around the hall.

The various workers all faced her, with one speaking to her. “Yes, ma’am. It’s ready for the big day.”

Vaggie nodded. “Good. Now the waiting…”

Charlie then walked over to her girlfriend, her eyes soft as she smiled. “You look stressed, mi amor.”

“Planning your parents’ second wedding is apparently harder than I thought it would be.” Vaggie sighed before facing her. “But, I’ll be fine.”

Charlie smiled and rested her forehead against Vaggie’s. “It means a lot to us that you’re helping.”

“Well. It’s the least I could do.” Vaggie smiled. “I’m just surprised that your parents are doing this. It’s been barely a year since she came back and here they are, getting married a second time despite never even getting divorced.”

Charlie giggled. “You should’ve seen the second proposal. They literally proposed to each other at the exact same time. ”

“Wow. They love each other, huh?” Vaggie asked.

Charlie grinned and kissed her forehead. “As much as I love you.”

“Charlie…we’re in public.” Vaggie said.

The big day. Lucifer had been forced to go to several other weddings and he loved every second of his own…but that didn’t erase one thing:

Nerves.

“Is my suit okay!? Is my hat okay!? AM I OKAY!?!?” Lucifer shrieked.

Michael walked over, looking at the same mirror his brother was. “Luci, you look great. It’s fine.”

“More than fine even!” Prince Stolas himself said with a smile. “Lilith will love it!”

Lucifer took a deep breath. “Alright…alright, alright. I can do this! I can marry the only woman I’ve ever loved a second time!!!”

“I’m…still confused as to how that works.” Stolas admitted. “You two never divorced.”

Michael shrugged. “I think it’s more a grand romantic gesture than anything else.”

Stolas sighed. “Still hoping for Blitz to do that to me sometime…”

“Just give it time. Take things slow.” Michael reassured.

Lucifer smiled. “Yeah, Stols! I mean, take me and Lily for example! We started off as friends and now look at us!”

“…Luci, I highly doubt you were ever just friends at one point. If love at first sight is a thing, that’s you two.” Michael said, his eyes narrowed.

Then, the door opened and the newly adopted Morningstar and Head Seraphim, Emily, poked her head in. “Dad, you’re on! Mom’s about to come out soon!”

“Shoot! Thanks, sweetie.” Lucifer said with a grin before he fastened his bowtie and then walked out with Michael following, since he was his best man.

And as he stood at the end of the isle patiently, he could see just how many people they actually invited.

His siblings, his daughters and Vaggie, The Deadly Sins and any partners they had, all the residents of The Hazbin Hotel both redeemed and unredeemed, about three other demon royals (the ones that were tolerable), Azazel and his followers, and about two Heavenly Council members.

Those last ones were mostly just because they needed to fill up space.

“Nervous yet?” Ozzie whispered.

Lucifer laughed. “You kidding? I’m terrified. What if she’s actually gonna wanna divorce me this time?”

“Relax, Luci.” Michael reassured before a familiar music filled the air and they all stood straight.

Then, the doors very slowly opened…and in walked The Queen of Hell herself, wearing an absolutely stunning purple gown. She had her crown on her head and her long horns were out for everyone to see. And of course, her blonde hair was as beautiful and long as ever.

She slowly walked down the isle, smiling softly.

Lucifer’s whole face nearly went red at the sight of his bride before he snapped out of it once she made it to the end of the isle, standing across from the king.

The world’s first lovers stared at each other for a moment before a familiar figure appeared in the middle of them.

God himself, now wearing a white and gold robe instead of his usual tuxedo. GM cleared his throat and the music came to a stop. “Friends, family, and some we just invited for no particular reason!”

A few chuckles couldn’t help but be heard from the audience.

“We gather here today to celebrate the reunion of King Lucifer Morningstar and Queen Lilith Morningstar in unholy matrimony.” GM smiled. “Or holy. Whichever you prefer.”

“Dad.” Lucifer said softly with an amused grin.

GM nodded, focusing on the event at hand. He then snapped his fingers and two pillows with golden rings on them floated right beside Lucifer and Lilith.

Lucifer smiled, grabbing his queen's ring and slowly sliding it on her finger. Lilith’s smile was possibly wider as she did the same.

“We shall now proceed with the vows.” GM said, turning to his son.

Lucifer nodded and then looked at Lilith. “…my love. My queen. One of the only lights in such a dark and dreary Hell. When I first met you, I saw you as this truly fascinating and beautiful person. Somehow, your smile could rival the gorgeousness of Heaven’s cities. I honestly don’t know how I could have not fallen for you…and I’m happy that I did. We’ve had some bumps in the road, times where we’ve fought and struggled to be on the same page…but I’m truly so grateful that I met you. No dream I’ve ever had could possibly beat the times I spent with you or the family we made.”

GM smiled and then turned to Lilith as he vaguely heard someone blow their nose in the audience.

Lilith’s cheeks were rosy at Lucifer’s words before she spoke. “My Lightbringer…if you had given me an entire day to write out everything I felt about you, we would be here for longer. You gave me freedom and the choice to be who I wanted to be. You gave me my home, my daughters, and above all…another chance. I left out of fear of what I was turning you into. For a moment, I couldn’t see the ambitious dreamer I fell for…but now? Now, that’s all I can see and more. The only time I will ever leave again is the day I am finally struck down.”

“If anyone wishes to object and see that these two shall not be wed… please leave.” GM said.

A few laughs were heard, especially from Lucifer and Lilith.

GM then stood tall. “Lucifer, do you take Lilith to be your royally wedded wife for richer and for poor, for sickness and for health, together as you both shall live til death do you part?”

“I do.” Lucifer smiled.

“And Lilith, do you take Lucifer to be your royally wedded husband for richer and for poor, for sickness and for health, together as you both shall live til death do you part?”

“I do.” Lilith nodded.

GM smiled. “Then, by the power vested in me as the creator of the known universe…I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the-“

Lilith tossed her bouquet into the air and grabbed her husband, dipping him and pulling him into a deep kiss as everyone stood from their seats and began to clap.

However though, the bouquet landed…right on Charlie's head, although the Princess of Hell didn’t even notice.

Life in Hell sucked through and through, but it surprisingly wasn’t nearly as bad as the former Exorcists were thinking it would be.

They managed to get an apartment and some jobs…but having to work to keep a roof over your head was new.

Adam groaned as he collapsed on the couch. “I miss Heaven!!!”

Lute sighed as she sat beside her sort-of boyfriend. “I know.”

“Seriously, this place f*cking sucks! I love the hardcore vibes, but… working? Having to avoid dying? UGH!!!” Adam groaned.

Lute then grabbed the television remote. “How about we just see what is on to distract ourselves?”

But when she turned on the TV…the wedding between Lucifer and Lilith started to play.

Adam’s now red eyes glowed. “Are you f*cking kidding me!?!? Did they get married a second time!?!”

Lute sighed and changed the channel…and then again…and then again.

The wedding was on every channel.

Lute sighed. “…well. It could be worse.”

“How could this be worse!?” Adam cried.

“He could be marrying Lilith and Eve at the same time. And then f*cking them both.” Lute said.

“…if Eve wasn’t a f*cking psycho now, yeah, I’d agree.”